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Today, taking the train to work after the worst hangover ever, two immense fat women start talking about rim jobs. I got up to switch cabins just in time for their conversation to switch over to RECEIVING rim jobs. I sprayed puke all over myself and an innocent bystander. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15067) - you deserved it (2442)
On 01/08/2009 at 6:21am - health - by depraved - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was baby-sitting four rather noisy and rowdy kids. After a two hour struggle, I finally manage to get them into bed. I then ask them what they want before going to sleep, and the eldest replies: "Can you tell us a story where you die at the end?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (23418) - you deserved it (1919)
On 12/29/2008 at 5:56am - kids - by Hellau - Sent from mobile version
Today, I sat in the train and the old lady sitting next to me stares at my face. I ask her if she is ok and she starts yelling "Willy! It's you! Where have you been all this time?". The entire train trip went like this. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13272) - you deserved it (952)
On 12/25/2008 at 5:30am - misc - by LDF - Sent from mobile version
Today, I'm 65 years old, and I've been given a bottle of wine produced in the year I was born. The wine tastes foul; not a good omen. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13133) - you deserved it (1488)
On 12/21/2008 at 7:14am - misc - by Phil - Sent from mobile version
Today, Father Christmas touched my ass in a shopping mall. I'm a bit worried about what's going to happen on Christmas Day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12542) - you deserved it (1256)
On 12/21/2008 at 12:04am - misc - by Loola - Sent from mobile version
Today, I am a Frenchie who's been in England for two months. While wanting to say to my technician that my manager made me groan during our meeting, I said that he made me moan. Now he keeps looking at me with a grin on his face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11200) - you deserved it (2206)
On 12/18/2008 at 11:30am - misc - by ladyhead - United Kingdom (Kingston upon Hull)
Today, I discovered that my 15 year old girl had hidden a disgusting porn film in the "future career" folder. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34189) - you deserved it (4597)
On 12/02/2008 at 3:27am - intimacy - by hell! - Sent from mobile version
Today, I went to rent a DVD with my 85-year-old grandpa. I was walking around and then realized I was alone. I looked for him for quite a while until I finally found him open-mouthed in the porn section. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21181) - you deserved it (1677)
On 11/21/2008 at 7:53am - misc - by Kourou - Sent from mobile version
Today, I sent a text message to my girlfriend telling her how much I wanted to make love to her tonight. I've just realized I sent it to her brother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30911) - you deserved it (14482)
On 11/14/2008 at 6:20am - intimacy - by Kaji - Sent from mobile version
Monday 20 May 2013
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