Joey44

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Joey44

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 12010
  • Number of comments : 138
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Joey44's page activity

Visits<b>GAeroNKissR</b> - the 11/12/2015 at 12:32am<b>Ethann44</b> - the 01/02/2015 at 8:02pm<b>kelseysking</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 10:21am<b>Bafrinn</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 9:52pm<b>Bradley_Dillon</b> - the 11/06/2013 at 1:58am<b>lexandra957</b> - the 12/17/2011 at 7:19pm<b>kewlstoribro</b> - the 12/07/2011 at 7:56pm<b>geon_olam</b> - the 12/06/2011 at 7:47pm<b>raphanne</b> - the 11/17/2011 at 12:11pm<b>DocBastard</b> - the 11/03/2011 at 11:20am<b>krez</b> - the 10/12/2011 at 12:17pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:24pm

Joey44's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

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Joey44's favorite FMLs

Today, I discovered that last night, my son snuck downstairs at 3am, drank two glasses of my very expensive wine, threw up on his bed, and then slept in his own vomit. My son is 14. FML

by sadmommy / 04/23/2012 at 6:51pm / United States (Texas) / Kids

Today, due to nervousness, I threw up while proposing to my girlfriend. FML

by Anonymous / 04/23/2012 at 5:51am / United States / Love

Today, I found out the bed I sleep in is the bed I was conceived in. FML

by Capteen / 04/22/2012 at 8:17am / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my mum bought a phone. Since teaching her how to text, I have received 27 messages, repeatedly saying the word "penis". FML

by jaderie / 04/21/2012 at 5:26am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to explain to my neighbor that not all black people are lactose intolerant. His eyes still bulge out every time I eat cheese. FML

Today, some Juggalos mocked me for the way I was dressed. Juggalos giving sartorial advice, really? FML

by amazed / 04/18/2012 at 7:08pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, during my first day as a doctor’s intern, I attended a consultation. The embarrassed patient asked me to leave. Not really knowing my way around, I went through the first door I could find. By the time I realized it was a closet, I didn’t dare come back out. Twenty minutes is a long time to wait. FML

by bibou2324 / 04/18/2012 at 4:41pm / Work

Today, I woke up to a text from my mother-in-law saying, "Happy birthday! I hope you have great birthday sex!" I'm now afraid to go over there for dinner tonight. FML

by Anonymous / 04/17/2012 at 3:29pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Intimacy

Today, while I was in the midst of the most mind-blowing shower sex ever, the fire alarm went off. My girlfriend had left the stove top on and the entire kitchen had caught on fire. So instead of finishing, I frantically ran around naked trying to douse the flames. FML

by blocked_by_fire / 04/17/2012 at 2:13pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I have been awake so long I hallucinated a llama in my living room. I have a medical condition that keeps me from sleeping properly. I've run out of medication. I still see the llama. FML

by SeeingLlamas / 04/17/2012 at 5:38am / United States (Tennessee) / Health

Today, there was a mandatory staff-wide "cleaning party" for a corporate inspection. I was assigned the outside bar which is infested with full-grown roaches with wings. FML

by Anonymous / 04/17/2012 at 12:26am / United States / Work

Today, I found out that my daughter has been watching Supernatural and The X-Files so she'll fit in better at school. I'm not even angry that she's suddenly a brain-dead conformist, it's just that she now has nightmares all the time and insists on sleeping in my bed. She's a kicker. FML

by orangechicken / 04/16/2012 at 6:00pm / United States (Michigan) / Kids

Today, I was in the car with my daughter, when I narrowly missed hitting a car after running a stop sign. After she screamed at me and demanded to know what I was doing, I had to admit that I'd been daydreaming about David Bowie. FML

by DJ Clitter / 04/16/2012 at 3:35pm / United States / Transportation

Today, my mom admitted that the only reason she took me out for lunch was because she felt guilty over going on a massive shopping spree for my sister while I was forced to stay home alone. I thanked her for the Wendy's meal anyway. FML

by Rebecca / 04/16/2012 at 2:49pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I watched as my neighbor walked to my front lawn, looked me right in the eye, and pissed on my mailbox. FML

by Anonymous / 04/16/2012 at 8:38am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous