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Jirekianu2's favorite FMLs
Today, at my job working retail, I had just finished cleaning and straightening a whole aisle. This kid watched me do the whole thing. When I was done, he stuck his arm out, and ran it down the whole shelf, knocking everything off it. His mother just grabbed his hand and walked away. FML
by RetailRage / 08/10/2015 at 8:23am / United States (California) / Work
by jordan.marie97 / 08/09/2015 at 2:27am / Australia / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 08/08/2015 at 11:53pm / United States / Kids
Today, my sister offered me a couple doughnuts she bought recently. Thinking she was just being nice, I went ahead and started eating, and was met with the most horrid taste I've ever experienced. Turns out her "recently" was two weeks ago. FML
by Anonymous / 08/07/2015 at 5:18pm / United Kingdom (Plymouth) / Miscellaneous
Today, I had to take a drugs test at work. Later, I found out it was my fiancé's mother who called our hotline. Her reason: I work till 6 pm, her "baby" should eat before that, but he can't cook, so I should quit my job. He is 35. And he thinks I should apologize for upsetting her at dinner. FML
by Dobche / 08/06/2015 at 7:16am / Bulgaria (Burgas) / Work
Today, I took a dump at work, when I realized there was no toilet paper left. There was another guy in the room, so I asked him for some. He decided he'd rather dump all the rolls of paper into the other toilets, before wishing me luck and walking out while laughing his ass off. FML
by FUCKFACECUNT / 08/02/2015 at 9:32am / United Arab Emirates (Abu Dhabi) / Work
by Son of a Bitch / 08/01/2015 at 1:17pm / United States / Holidays
by GidleyWife / 07/30/2015 at 1:22pm / United States (California) / Kids
by HF44 / 07/29/2015 at 1:00pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Application / 07/28/2015 at 4:44pm / United States (Ohio) / Work
by Anonymous / 07/27/2015 at 9:27pm / United States (Florida) / Love
Today, I went to put a lasagna in the oven for dinner. I was greeted by a revolting scent of a chicken-soup and biscuits boxed dinner. The fridge apparently was too full for my brother to put it away inside, so he covered it up and forgot about it in the oven. We made that dinner two weeks ago. FML.
by Anonymous / 07/26/2015 at 6:43pm / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went on a fabulous date with a really cute, smart, funny guy. He only mentioned his dad, so when I asked about his mom, I asked if they were divorced. She'd died of breast cancer so I felt awful. Then I asked if his dad had ever remarried. His stepmom had died of cancer too. FML
by lextoast / 07/26/2015 at 2:15pm / Rwanda / Love
by WhoLikesPie / 07/25/2015 at 11:51am / United States (Florida) / Love
Today, I'm grieving over the death of my best friend of 9 years. My mom wasted no time arriving at the conclusion that I must be hormonal and pregnant with his child. Apparently it's not normal for a woman to cry so much over a man, unless they've been fucking. FML
by Anonymous / 07/24/2015 at 12:05pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
- Today, I stuck my hands in my pocket to get my phone during math class. The teacher then announced… Today, my mother surprised our family by playing a clip of my ex singing a song he wrote. She tells… Today, my dad brought home yet another different brand of dog food. Today was also the day I spent…