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Jenmic

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Jenmic
  • Town/Country : Canada
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 16 March 1986 (27 years)
  • Number of visits : 1426
  • Number of comments : 53
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

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This isn't what should be happening

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Jenmic's favorite FMLs

Today, I returned to my apartment to find everything reduced to ashes, hidden in black clouds of smoke. Turns out there was a blackout, and my fiancé lit a candle on top of a stack of all our wedding papers. When he smelled the smoke, he got hungry for a taco and left instead of calling 911. FML

#2387828
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53382) - you deserved it (3767)

On 05/28/2009 at 9:32pm - misc - by Jeanine (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was pulled over by a police officer for speeding. After writing the ticket, he asked me why I was wearing a surgical mask. I told him that swine flu was found in our area and I was scared. He thought that I was insulting him and wrote me another ticket. FML

#1383069
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62361) - you deserved it (11643)

On 04/27/2009 at 2:24am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was looking at my recommendations on Amazon, which included several vibrators. Just a few days earlier I was looking at books on anger management. Amazon thinks I need to get laid. They're right. FML

#1297315
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53546) - you deserved it (6546)

On 04/24/2009 at 6:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while working at a Subway store right next to a big hospital, there was a big line of people all getting their subs toasted. Without turning around, I asked the next person in line, "I'll bet you want yours extra toasted?" She was a burns victim from the hospital. FML

Today, I got my long hair cut in a short pixie cut. When my five year old daughter saw me she laughed and proclaimed 'You look just like a man!'. That afternoon I got a concerned call from the school. My daughter has told everyone 'mummy has gone away, I now have two daddies!' FML

#765462
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58147) - you deserved it (5651)

On 04/02/2009 at 12:14pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Edinburgh)

Today, I was at a Chinese restaurant, I'd forgotten my glasses and had a migraine. I was straining my eyes, squinting and rubbing my temples to alleviate my migraine. I was kicked out of the restaurant and banned henceforth because my waitress thought I was mocking her eyes. FML

#433810
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70775) - you deserved it (8940)

On 03/18/2009 at 2:22am - misc - by lemonjuice (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, while I was out to eat, I was approached by the restaurant manager. He told me that while he respected my personal choices, his patrons didn't feel comfortable with someone who used to be a man using the women's restroom. He thought I was a transsexual. I am a naturally-born female. FML

#424816
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (283152) - you deserved it (21969)

On 03/17/2009 at 9:24pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, in a very crowded public restroom at a sporting arena, after looking to the man using the urinal to his right, my 6 year old son turns to address me on his left and exclaims, "Daddy, that man's wiener is a lot bigger than yours!" The whole bathroom heard and looked immediately at me. FML

#221148
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56955) - you deserved it (2857)

On 03/05/2009 at 8:51pm - kids - by SadDad - United States (Florida)

Today, after class I was chatting with my teacher, a really cool and stylish old black guy. I tell him he reminds me of one of those soul dudes from those 70s movies, right down to the pimp-walk. He tells me he walks that way because he was beaten for drinking out of the wrong fountain as a kid. FML

#115273
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16829) - you deserved it (37659)

On 02/23/2009 at 5:11pm - misc - by catfish - United States (Texas)

Today, My boyfriend gave me a gift card for $32 to a local salon. I thought the amount was kind of random, but when I went in I saw that the bikini wax was $32. FML

#66686
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33240) - you deserved it (10191)

On 02/18/2009 at 3:06am - misc - by nadalada (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was taking the elevator down with a group of people. It stopped on the 2nd floor and I said "What asshole can't take the steps from the 2nd floor?" Then a kid in a wheelchair got on. FML

#6517
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4496) - you deserved it (33055)

On 02/03/2009 at 3:30pm - misc - by j0natron (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)



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