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Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Today, a guy I've been seeing for a while sent me a link to a porn site, with the message, "Holy fuck, isn't this your mom?!" Thinking he was joking around, I clicked the link just to see what sick shit he wanted to show me. It was my mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48128) - you deserved it (1980)
On 09/19/2012 at 4:41pm - intimacy - by identitychangeplease - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)
Today, my boyfriend introduced me to his parents. My boyfriend is Japanese, and I wanted to introduce myself in Japanese so I'd asked him. Little did I know he'd taught me how to say, "Hello, I love your son's cock." I almost got kicked out of their house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22541) - you deserved it (3170)
On 09/16/2012 at 8:50pm - love - by painfetish8021 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I was shopping with my boyfriend, when he suggested that I might want to buy a new loofah. When I asked why, he admitted he's been using it to scrub his ass crack for weeks. I use that loofah to wash my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18134) - you deserved it (1605)
On 09/16/2012 at 3:48pm - health - by Derp McShitstain (woman) - United Kingdom (St. Helens)
Today, I was pulled over. The cop stated that he "couldn't see" me because I had "blended in with the dark car background", and that it looked like no one was driving. I was literally pulled over for being black. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36536) - you deserved it (2906)
On 09/12/2012 at 3:00am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, my girlfriend of 2 years texted me saying "I can't wait to f*ck later." I replied saying, "Couldn't we just spend time together?" Her response was, "What are you, a girl?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (13288) - you deserved it (34157)
On 04/12/2012 at 12:06am - intimacy - by girly (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I accidentally moaned my own name during sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25850) - you deserved it (20212)
On 01/04/2012 at 1:43am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my dad looked me dead in the eyes and told me that if I wanted to join the Lingerie Football League, I would have his approval. His drunken friends nodded in agreement. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25113) - you deserved it (2064)
On 08/26/2011 at 7:32pm - misc - by Alexis - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was buying condoms for my girlfriend and myself. While at the checkout counter, my guy friend sees me, runs to me, puts his arm around me, kisses me on the cheek, then yells "Thank you baby!" There were about twenty people behind me, they all gave me dirty looks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29425) - you deserved it (7541)
On 05/09/2010 at 10:20am - intimacy - by imustbegay - United States
Today, I entered my bedroom, ready to play some COD on my xbox 360. Instead, I find a note where my xbox used to be. It read "You think you can cheat on me and get away with it? Fuck you. I smashed the hell out of your stupid xbox." It was signed by my girlfriend. I never cheated on her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28117) - you deserved it (2116)
On 01/06/2010 at 7:29pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)
Today, I was working at a grocery store when a couple of my co-workers called a code pink in aisle 22, which means there was an attractive woman in that aisle. After hearing about how hot she was, I went over to see her for myself. It was my mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52175) - you deserved it (4038)
On 05/17/2009 at 1:46am - work - by sonofmilf (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I wanted to seduce my boyfriend so I put on my sexiest lingerie and started playing mood music. As he was eating dinner, I climbed up on the table and started seductively crawling across to him. The table collapsed under my weight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23539) - you deserved it (36629)
On 02/15/2009 at 6:15pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)
Monday 20 May 2013
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