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JazzVibes's favorite FMLs
by Volunteer / 09/13/2013 at 6:24pm / United States (Indiana) / Work
by solitaire / 07/20/2013 at 4:14am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
by cheated / 07/19/2013 at 1:34pm / United States (North Carolina) / Love
by Kat_Styles / 07/19/2013 at 4:51am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
Today, during a sex ed lesson, we were given a lecture on pregnancy and abortion from the school nurse. Throughout the session she kept repeating, "Of course, Sophie knows ALL about this." The nurse happens to know that my dad's a gynaecologist. That's not what everyone else in the year thinks. FML
by Soph / 03/25/2013 at 5:53pm / United Kingdom (Birmingham) / Miscellaneous
Today, as per usual, my mother went to see her psychic, who told her that one of her children is harbouring a "dark secret". Now we're all grounded until one of us confesses our obviously non-existent secret. FML
by daughter of a gullible cunt / 01/13/2013 at 4:02pm / Australia / Miscellaneous
by hiccups / 01/13/2013 at 1:15am / United States (Connecticut) / Kids
Today, my wife brought my 5-year-old daughter to visit me at the office. My boss has a speech impediment, and when she heard it, she exclaimed, "Hey my daddy can sound just like you! Show him daddy! Show him!" FML
by Anonymous / 01/12/2013 at 3:14am / United States (Texas) / Kids
Today, while buying paint, I began to help an elderly woman working to lift some heavy boxes. She told me what a nice young lady I was. Then her boss came over, screamed at her for being lazy and fired her. She cried. So did I. FML
by Anonymous / 12/31/2012 at 10:44am / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Miscellaneous
Today, at a restaurant, I happily watched as my boyfriend of three years got down on his knees and proposed to me. Before I could say yes and hug him, a girl flung herself at him, kissed him and shouted, "Yes!" With us still highly confused, she then ran away. FML
by Anonymous / 12/30/2012 at 1:29am / Canada (Alberta) / Love
by gassy / 12/29/2012 at 4:32am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
Today, I set up a spy cam in my room to find out which one of my pervy brothers has been using my computer to watch porn. Turns out it was actually my father. I now have a video of him sitting in my chair masturbating, and I can't get it out of my head. FML
by Anonymous / 12/28/2012 at 2:05pm / Malaysia (Selangor) / Miscellaneous
Today, a girl mistook me for her boyfriend and broke up with me because I'm "a liar and a cheating bastard." I've never seen her in my life, but I'm so lonely that I tried to convince her to give me another chance and stay with me. FML
by Alone / 12/28/2012 at 12:24am / United States / Love
by Anonymous / 12/27/2012 at 11:31pm / United States / Love
by gaggin / 12/26/2012 at 2:30pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 2Today, after working for Uber for a few weeks I realized that my driver rating was dropping. After… 3Today, I received a phone call, angry at me for not calling my dad on Father's Day. When I told her…
- Today, I’m on a mission in Africa. My company driver is so old, deaf and half blind that I have to… Today, I told my son off because he lost a form. A form that I later found in my right-hand pocket.… Today, returning home, I found my roommate trying one of my bras. When he saw my shocked face, the…