About Jayrs93 : Hello my next creeper, here's my life... Video games and sports... And if there is any kind of apocalypse I hope it is a zombie one so I can kill some zombies... Sniper, pistol mix, with a machete I think so... I'm never on FML on the computer so if u message me i will probably not answer (and by probably I mean it's highly unlikely)... Have an nice life :)
Mobility
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Today, my brother had a party with over 60 people in my basement. It turns out that five different couples had sex under the same comforter. The comforter was mine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23571) - you deserved it (1872)
On 07/11/2012 at 9:29am - intimacy - by Sherry - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I got a new pair of glasses, and was driving home. While waiting at a stop sign, I noticed a homeless guy touching himself. He saw me, smiled and waved, and then continued. So much for my new eyesight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16229) - you deserved it (1480)
On 06/11/2012 at 4:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I was playing an online game in nothing but my boxers, when suddenly a girl joined my team. I immediately felt embarrassed and put some pants on. There were no webcams involved. I need to get out more. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12983) - you deserved it (8925)
On 06/01/2012 at 12:48am - misc - by furred (man) - Philippines
Today, I found out that my ex-girlfriend, the girl I completely love, is now dating my father. She tried giving me the "I know I'm not your mother..." speech. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44858) - you deserved it (1874)
On 09/24/2011 at 7:01pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, out of my bedroom window, I can see my next door neighbour's window. On his ledge, I can see binoculars, tissues and vaseline. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35909) - you deserved it (3191)
On 09/24/2011 at 3:22am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML
I agree, your life sucks (71665) - you deserved it (9144)
On 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by IbetIgotAIDS (man) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I asked my Dad if it was true that my mother had a C-section at my birth. He replied "Yeah, so technically you weren't even born, you were surgically removed, like a tumor." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29394) - you deserved it (3957)
On 09/01/2011 at 7:40pm - misc - by mannydanny (woman) - United Kingdom (Coventry)
Today, I got a text message from a number I don't know saying "I'm sorry, but I'm cheating on you, I couldn't do this in person because you're ugly when you cry." I haven't had a relationship in 6 years and I still manage to get dumped. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29720) - you deserved it (1944)
On 08/26/2011 at 7:09am - love - by j_babydoll6520 - Australia (Victoria)
Today, my grandpa told me what he'd do if he was president. I sat there for 30 minutes listening to how he'd get rid of prisons, send all the prisoners to a desert for 5 years and give them a gun to fight over. And then he'd surgically attach child molesters' penises to their foreheads. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23227) - you deserved it (4129)
On 08/23/2011 at 10:46am - intimacy - by Andrew (man) - United States
Today, while riding in the car with my mother, we got into an argument, at which point she pulled the vehicle over, took the key out of the ignition and used it to turn off the passenger airbag. She then continued driving in silence. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27066) - you deserved it (3321)
On 08/20/2011 at 2:23am - misc - by W1D0 - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was teasing my 12 year old little cousin about him liking my best friend. I guess it made him mad because he yelled "Breast cancer!" at the top of his lungs before power-punching my right boob. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14455) - you deserved it (22954)
On 08/13/2011 at 2:51am - kids - by brittbrat4 - United States (Florida)
Today, I was using a public urinal when a man came up to use the one next to me. As he approached, he said, "Friendly spy plane inbound" and pretended to look at my knob. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20688) - you deserved it (1812)
On 08/12/2011 at 6:40am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)
I agree, your life sucks (26818) - you deserved it (3816)
On 08/12/2011 at 2:17am - misc - by TuteSweet - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I gave my dad a brochure for anger management. His response? Throwing a chair out the window. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29933) - you deserved it (6352)
On 07/28/2011 at 11:25am - health - by 99520 - United States (Indiana)
Today, I discovered that when you buy ropes, duct tapes, a shovel, razor blades, a fire poker, and a carton of cigs, the police can turn up and search your house for 'prisoners'. Those items were actually coincidental. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28135) - you deserved it (6462)
On 07/19/2011 at 9:51pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)
Friday 24 May 2013
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