JaykeXD

Search for a member

Offline (the 01/14/2016 at 5:49am)

JaykeXD

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 14 July 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1264
  • Number of comments : 28
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About JaykeXD : Whoa...I'm Jayke. I'm always happy and I love meeting new people so hit me up. Not trying to be a dick but when I read some of these stories it makes me appreciate my predictable boring life. Oh, I'm kind of a spelling nazi. Seriously though, send me a damned message. I'm fucking lonely over here.

JaykeXD's page activity

Visits<b>W31rdG1rl</b> - the 07/14/2016 at 6:25am<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 1:48am<b>Quendolin</b> - the 05/30/2016 at 2:17pm<b>neneluvsyooh</b> - the 03/13/2016 at 11:40pm<b>Dodgejeeptrucks</b> - the 03/03/2016 at 7:08pm<b>mwing14</b> - the 12/11/2015 at 7:50pm<b>itta_pupu</b> - the 09/25/2015 at 6:47am<b>HarleyBlues</b> - the 09/15/2015 at 5:38pm<b>lemondrop81</b> - the 09/08/2015 at 4:59am<b>Larissa24</b> - the 09/04/2015 at 6:04pm<b>imnotslick</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 2:31pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 10:03am<b>me127</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 7:32pm<b>nikebaseball10</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 1:39am<b>toasty_narwals</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 10:19pm<b>uncle_jimmy</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 2:08pm<b>aa1717</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 3:16pm<b>1nertia</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 5:35am

Fucked!<b>HarleyBlues</b> - the 09/15/2015 at 11:39pm

JaykeXD's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of JaykeXD's badges

JaykeXD's favorite FMLs

Today, my father told me to take the car and get some groceries. An hour and a half later, coming home with the groceries, I see the cops all around my house because my dad had called them, thinking that I had run away and stolen the car. FML

by me / 11/11/2012 at 11:30pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was consoling my drunk husband as he violently emptied his stomach contents into our toilet. One particular retch made me nauseous, and I vomited all down his back, causing him to turn his head and vomit all over the wall. I got to clean it all up. FML

by hnickell93 / 10/08/2012 at 9:55pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I found out that my parents changed the code on our alarm system while they were out of town. The police could not verify I was their son, despite spending hours trying to get hold of them. They thought it was just another telemarketer. FML

by Anonymous / 09/23/2012 at 10:26pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I bought the only cat on Earth that doesn't like chasing after a laser dot. Goodbye, hours of sick, sick entertainment. FML

by lonelygirl / 08/17/2012 at 7:33pm / United States (Utah) / Animals

Today, I finally convinced my girlfriend to allow the cats to sleep with us on the bed. As we started to cuddle, one of the cats pissed right in between us. We are sleeping on the couch until the baking soda absorbs the smell in the mattress. I'll be sleeping there longer than that. FML

by couchsurfer / 08/09/2012 at 8:02pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

Today, my mom thought I was flying high on weed and nearly grounded me for it. I wasn't high, I was just actually in a good mood for the first time in a few weeks. FML

by HappyMan / 08/02/2012 at 10:14pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to slowly explain to my boss that in some parts of the world, it's currently winter, due to the different hemispheres. He scoffed, accused me of "making shit up," and said that if I took him for a fool again, I'd be looking for a new job. FML

by Anonymous / 07/14/2012 at 6:47pm / United States / Work

Today, I got a sweet promotion at my job. Instead of being happy and celebrating with me, my boyfriend broke up with me because he is jealous that I'm more successful than he is. FML

by jenA / 07/11/2012 at 10:40pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my parents were awake while I was still in bed on my iPod touch. I decided to play The Smurfs Village. One of its minigames involves shaking the iPod, so I was breathing heavily. Later, my parents sat me down for a little "talk". FML

by Anonymous / 06/23/2012 at 9:11am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was reading a book on paper for the first time in maybe a month. I had to stop at a word I did not recognise. Because I'm so used to using a Kindle, I tried to get the definition by pressing it. I had my finger on the word for a few seconds before I realised it was paper. FML

by Bilze / 05/17/2012 at 2:57pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I bought a lanyard for my new car keys. "Epic Fail" was printed on it. Not two hours after getting it and putting my keys on it, I locked them in my car. I don't have a spare. FML

by Anonymous / 09/25/2011 at 12:18am / United States / Transportation

Today, my girlfriend of six months broke up with me because I didn't know what her favorite ice cream was. She says it proves I don't care enough about her. I don't think I've ever seen her eat ice cream. FML

by wtf3456 / 08/31/2011 at 5:16am / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, I introduced my parrot to oranges. Now she makes a high pitched scream if I don't give her any, and I've just run out of oranges. FML

by bursteardrums / 08/16/2011 at 11:00am / United Kingdom (Devon) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was so drunk that I gave my mom's number instead of mine to the really cute guy I met at the bar. FML

by MC / 08/14/2011 at 10:51pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I was so drunk that I gave my mom's number instead of mine to the really cute guy I met at the bar. FML

by MC / 08/14/2011 at 10:51pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love