Jasper

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Jasper

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 258886
  • Number of comments : 203
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Jasper : i love girls. i love boys.

Jasper's page activity

Visits<b>WP40</b> - the 10/21/2016 at 8:26am<b>beatlesfan117</b> - the 10/19/2016 at 6:19am<b>Franck045</b> - the 09/17/2016 at 12:52pm<b>Jahzara3lm</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 7:21pm<b>iYodah</b> - the 09/08/2016 at 9:00pm<b>ajk168</b> - the 09/08/2016 at 8:43pm<b>DrafteeSelf</b> - the 07/27/2016 at 8:29pm<b>JazzlaWazz</b> - the 07/06/2016 at 1:38pm<b>Redditfantic</b> - the 06/20/2016 at 7:48pm<b>thatweirdasian</b> - the 06/13/2016 at 9:56pm<b>draftskink</b> - the 06/06/2016 at 11:13pm<b>OB1Kenobi</b> - the 04/26/2016 at 3:41am<b>OnlyKayleah</b> - the 04/18/2016 at 3:05pm<b>logank013</b> - the 04/01/2016 at 2:00pm<b>walker9879</b> - the 03/30/2016 at 7:59am<b>hullarms</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 12:18pm<b>jill97</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 3:05am<b>SirPringles</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 4:46pm

Fucked!<b>thatweirdasian</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 3:56am<b>logank013</b> - the 04/01/2016 at 8:00pm<b>Angel1999</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 12:55am

Jasper's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Jasper's favorite FMLs

Today, I was with my girlfriend in her room. She starts screaming. Her father bursts in and, thinking I'm some kind of rapist, hits me in the head with a baseball bat. Not bad enough? I wasn't the one making her scream. There was a huge spider on the wall. FML

by spiderhater / 04/12/2009 at 2:11pm / United States (Virginia) / Animals

Today, I found my dog, who had been missing for over a month, at the local pound. Clearly it was my dog, she responded to her name and cried when she saw me. However, the woman there told me I could not simply take her, I had to follow through with all policies. I paid $250 to adopt my own dog. FML

by anbrown6 / 04/12/2009 at 1:55pm / United States (North Carolina) / Animals

Today, it was easter and I thought it might be fun to look for eggs with my little brother. My parents told me to take the ones in the higher places that my brother couldn't reach. All of his eggs were filled with candy or money. Each one of mine had a note saying 'maybe when you lose weight'. FML

by Anonymous / 04/12/2009 at 11:22am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, for Easter, my brother and sister both got $200 gifts from my parents. I got a chocolate egg. I'm allergic to chocolate. FML

by Anonymous / 04/12/2009 at 9:53am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I parked my car on the street to go to the gym. When I came back my car was blocked by a parade of people. I turned to a shop worker smoking a cigarette and said "Jesus! What the hell is going on?" I got many strange looks. It was a Good Friday parade lead by a local church. FML

by Anonymous / 04/11/2009 at 10:52pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Transportation

Today, I told my ex boyfriend I lost 20 lbs because of the stress of the break up. His response was "you're welcome." FML

by blutownie13 / 04/09/2009 at 6:11pm / United States / Love

Today, at lunch I was running to my group's table with my friend. She accidentally tripped me, and I slid across the café floor face first on my belly. The whole cafeteria was silent. They then broke out in hysterics when the head janitor ran up to me and yelled 'SAFE!' like a baseball umpire. FML

by eun / 04/08/2009 at 9:42pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got all my co-workers motivated. We were all going to quit and walk out the door. I went first. I gave an emotional speech to my boss and threw my uniform to the ground. Then I turned around to to see the rest follow, they all began laughing. They didn't. They WANTED me to quit. FML

by ineedanewjob / 04/08/2009 at 8:34pm / United States (Missouri) / Work

Today, I made the mistake of sneezing in front of a hyper religious customer, who for ten minutes blamed the incident of shifting weather patterns that signaled the return of Jesus, who was as she explained, upset about the abortion rates in America and President Obama. FML

by Anonymous / 04/08/2009 at 6:26am / United States (North Carolina) / Work

Today, my girlfriend and I were outside tanning in the sun. I asked her if she could put some sunscreen on my back. Thinking it would be funny, she used the lotion to write "I Love Little Boys". I work as a children's swimming instructor. FML

by Anonymous / 04/08/2009 at 12:03am / Canada (British Columbia) / Kids

Today, I ran over a squirrel. I saw it twitching, so I backed over it to end its suffering. It wasn't a squirrel; it was a kitten. The children it belonged to watched as I ran over their kitten. Twice. FML

by Anonymous / 04/07/2009 at 8:11pm / United States (Virginia) / Animals

Today, I saw the blueprints for my family's new house. My room is half the size of the room next to it. The room next to it is my step mom's walk-in closet. FML

by Powerfool / 04/07/2009 at 6:07am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was walking my little sister home from the eye doctor. It was raining out so we were kind of in a hurry to get home. We get home and about half an hour later, the cops show up. Apparently, someone saw me walking my sister and called the cops on me thinking I was a child molester. FML

by omgn00blolz89 / 04/06/2009 at 8:42pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I was at the mall shoplifting when a girl who looked my age pointed to a shirt I had in my bag. "Stole that, huh?" she asked smiling. She looked pretty cool, so I nodded and asked if she stole the jeans she was wearing, which were from the store. Turns out she didn't, she's the manager. FML

by blovesg / 04/06/2009 at 8:41pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, on my flight to Vegas, I was wishing that a really cute guy would come sit in the seat next to mine. A few minutes later, a really cute guy sat in the seat next to me and even started to talk to me. When I said, "I like rugged men." he said "Oh ya, me too! I really like buff guys also." FML

by vela9002 / 04/06/2009 at 3:40am / United States (California) / Love