Jasper

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Jasper

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 257780
  • Number of comments : 203
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Jasper : i love girls. i love boys.

Jasper's page activity

Visits<b>JazzlaWazz</b> - the 07/06/2016 at 1:38pm<b>Redditfantic</b> - the 06/20/2016 at 7:48pm<b>thatweirdasian</b> - the 06/13/2016 at 9:56pm<b>draftskink</b> - the 06/06/2016 at 11:13pm<b>OB1Kenobi</b> - the 04/26/2016 at 3:41am<b>OnlyKayleah</b> - the 04/18/2016 at 3:05pm<b>logank013</b> - the 04/01/2016 at 2:00pm<b>walker9879</b> - the 03/30/2016 at 7:59am<b>hullarms</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 12:18pm<b>jill97</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 3:05am<b>SirPringles</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 4:46pm<b>keyface5</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 9:44am<b>twarn15</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 7:37am<b>samrompain</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 10:08pm<b>david66</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 4:15pm<b>holymacabre</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 12:11am<b>2C0OL4SCH0OL</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 4:28pm<b>Envy22</b> - the 10/21/2015 at 8:54pm

Fucked!<b>thatweirdasian</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 3:56am<b>logank013</b> - the 04/01/2016 at 8:00pm<b>Angel1999</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 12:55am

Jasper's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Jasper's favorite FMLs

Today, I had my first appearance in a court as an attorney. I called the prosecution the prostitution. FML

by apav / 06/11/2009 at 7:52am / Australia (New South Wales) / Work

Today, my mom's will was read to the rest of the family. I helped my mom write it a couple years ago, and I was to get funds to pay off school loans. She revised it and put in a note saying I was to get nothing because I was "lazy." The executor read it out loud. FML

by TSampson / 06/11/2009 at 7:51am / United States (Georgia) / Money

Today, I decided to confess my feelings to the girl I've had a crush on since the beginning of high school. We agreed to meet at Starbucks, but she was bringing a friend. I didn't care, because I just wanted to tell her how I felt. When I got there, I saw her making out with another girl. FML

by Ryuga / 06/10/2009 at 9:43pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, my baseball team had a game and one of our best players was injured sliding into first. I'm pretty fast so when the coach called my name I grabbed a helmet assuming it was finally my chance to get in the game. Turns out he just wanted me to get ice. The entire team couldn't stop laughing. FML

by fmlprobot / 06/04/2009 at 7:48pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex. Over breakfast, she said it was the most intense, primal and mind-blowing sexual experience she ever had. Problem is, I don't remember a damned thing. FML

by Anonymous / 06/04/2009 at 4:10pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, I was cleaning my father's study room and wondering why I did not receive my acceptance/rejection letter from a college I really wanted. I found the acceptance letter, on his desk, also approving of a full scholarship. The deadline to confirm was a month ago. FML

by guamfml / 06/02/2009 at 8:10pm / Guam / Miscellaneous

Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunder storm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML

by fmlfmlfml / 06/02/2009 at 2:03pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I called Tech Support because the computer program wouldn't let me open files for my online classes. After an hour, and being walked through the downloading process multiple times. There was a pause and he said "You're a F*ing idiot." and hung up. It still won't work. FML

by holliefall / 06/02/2009 at 4:42am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at the extremely crowded gym when someone came up behind me and shouted in my ear scaring the living shit out of me. I jump into a karate pose in front of everyone. No one was behind me. It was a new song starting on my headphones. A trainer asked me if I needed an ambulance. FML

by dearme / 06/01/2009 at 9:53pm / United States (North Carolina) / Health

Today, I had to give a presentation about Adolf Hitler. I wanted to point out he was a very good speaker, and could incite a crowd. Instead, what came out was 'Hitler's oral skills made everyone go wild with excitement" FML

by Cail / 06/01/2009 at 7:12pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, there was a parents bike race on the track at my high school for a fundraiser. My dad entered, and ended up winning. He did his victory dance with a massive erection showing through his spandex. Just about all of my friends, teachers, other parents, and the hot soccer team saw. FML

by biker2012 / 06/01/2009 at 3:13pm / United States (Maine) / Intimacy

Today, I was getting my first tattoo done. My parents told me it was a bad idea. My friends' parents told me it was a bad idea. I told them that people get tattoos done all the time and nothing goes wrong. 50 min into the tattoo on my back, the artist says "Oh shit, shit, shit. We can fix this." FML

by thats_not_good / 05/28/2009 at 2:15pm / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I felt left out that all my friends are getting married or have great relationships and my boyfriend won't commit. I made a facebook up and pretended to talk with this really cute guy I made up. Today, I found out that my boyfriend is gay... he started hitting on my made up facebook guy. FML

by sounfair90 / 05/27/2009 at 12:06am / United States (Alabama) / Love

Today, I saw this tourist almost get hit by a cab. After he walked away I complained to my boyfriend about how idiotic people like him just deserve to die. After 5 blocks of my ranting the tourist turns around and says "I'm right in front of you bitch." I hid behind my laughing boyfriend. FML

by Ash / 05/26/2009 at 11:08pm / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous

Today, I snuck out of my house in the middle of the night. I ran into my dad carrying wine into another house. I didn't assume he was cheating until he saw me and said "I won't tell if you don't tell, please don't tell your mother". FML

by Anonymous / 05/25/2009 at 10:55am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous