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About JENNYPANTS13 : i live in the clouds. reality is not for me. people say i should come down. that clouds are not a place for grownups to be. i smile at them. maybe one day, i say maybe one day i'll come down. but i never will. reality is not for me. i shall stay up here. the view is quite breathtaking.
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I went to my school to take my yearbook picture. I was wearing a shirt that said ANALOG on the front. When I bent in to take the picture, part of my shirt overlapped itself. Now I'm known as the ANAL kid in the yearbook. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31916) - you deserved it (13065)
On 09/02/2009 at 5:23pm - misc - by boytoy (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I told my boyfriend that my fantasy was for him to eat me out on the dinner table. My boyfriend told me his was me in a Pikachu costume. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35471) - you deserved it (6317)
On 08/30/2009 at 1:38am - intimacy - by pokie (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was in the gas station and I saw this creepy lady staring at me and smiling. She just didn't stop. I even gave an awkward wave to let her know that I saw her staring at me. Finally I decided to confront the woman, turns out the overly happy woman was a cardboard cut out FML
I agree, your life sucks (9143) - you deserved it (44644)
On 07/15/2009 at 12:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I found out why my girlfriend of 8 months has never agreed to stay the night before. Now I have a 4-month old mattress that needs replacing, and a 23-year-old bedwetter for a girlfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39824) - you deserved it (5645)
On 07/05/2009 at 6:07am - misc - by wetboy (man) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I woke up finding myself violently humping my pillow. My mom recorded it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (54085) - you deserved it (9225)
On 07/04/2009 at 4:58am - intimacy - by R_U_CEREAL (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, my boyfriend returned from a 2 month internship in New York. As I saw him exit the plane, I imagined him running to me and kissing/spinning me around passionately like in movies. He got closer and closer, and as I opened my arms to embrace him, he runs past me saying, "BRB, I GOTTA TAKE A SHIT." FML
I agree, your life sucks (42730) - you deserved it (6899)
On 07/04/2009 at 2:07am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, the dentist sneezed in my mouth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (77445) - you deserved it (3345)
On 07/01/2009 at 2:33am - misc - by kewlio45 - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I finally hooked up with the boy of my dreams at a party. Later, while on aim, I noticed one of his friends away messages was a quote from the guy's screen name, which said "I can't believe what I stick my d... In sometimes." FML
I agree, your life sucks (34663) - you deserved it (8157)
On 07/01/2009 at 12:41am - love - by Bulldogs09 - Sent from mobile version
Today, my crush came to my house to watch movies with me. We were sitting on the couch when he turned to me and said that he had had a dream about me the night before. I moved in to kiss him, thinking he liked me. He then added that I had fallen of a cliff and he had pissed himself laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40540) - you deserved it (4300)
On 06/13/2009 at 7:01am - love - by Mojo_Jojo (woman) - China (Beijing)
Today, I woke up in the night and was really thirsty so I took a drink of water that had been sitting next to my bed for a few hours. After taking a huge gulp, I felt something strange in my mouth, ignored it and went back to sleep. When I woke up I saw all the ants that were floating in it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46145) - you deserved it (9564)
On 04/19/2009 at 3:07am - misc - by Ihatebugs. (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I found out that I'm pregnant. My husband and I have been trying to have a baby for a while, and I was very excited to tell him the news. When I opened his office planning to surprise him with the news, I saw him making out with a man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (317429) - you deserved it (15412)
On 04/19/2009 at 12:05am - intimacy - by soontobedivorced (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was at a frat band party dancing with my girl when I felt some liquid on my arm. Normally, I'll lick spilled drinks off my arms and being slightly intoxicated, I did. Then I realized it was chunky. The girl dancing next to us had puked everywhere and I licked her vomit off my arm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22265) - you deserved it (77565)
On 04/18/2009 at 6:42am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)
Today, I had to re-take an hour long MRI scan because I got an erection midway through. FML
I agree, your life sucks (58299) - you deserved it (11968)
On 04/17/2009 at 10:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I discovered that I had left my sunroof open all night during a storm and my front seats was soaked. I grabbed a towel for my seat but didn't close my sunroof because it was nice out. As I pull out of my driveway, I felt something wet hit my forehead. A bird shit on me through my sunroof. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49252) - you deserved it (10656)
On 04/16/2009 at 10:38am - animals - by oops1234 (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I decided to snack on some M&M's. I saw my dog sniffing something and realized one of my M&M's had fallen on the floor. To prevent my dog from eating the chocolate, I hurriedly snatched the M&M off the ground and ate it. When I bit down, I realized it wasn't an M&M. It was a dead beetle. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26747) - you deserved it (40864)
On 04/15/2009 at 9:22pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)
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