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IvanHou

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IvanHou

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 30 January 1983 (31 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 340
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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IvanHou's favorite FMLs

Today, my brother tried to convince me to get a clitoris piercing at his recently opened piercing studio. FML

#20668963
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59738) - you deserved it (6044)

On 05/17/2013 at 12:40pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Varmlands Lan)

Today, my girlfriend was visiting, and while in the bathroom, she clogged the toilet. Since there was no plunger in the room, she unclogged it with the only thing she could find: my mother's hairbrush. FML

#20660172
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40136) - you deserved it (4760)

On 05/13/2013 at 1:02am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I told my husband that a guy I work with told me that I'm the most beautiful woman he has ever met. My husband replied, "He needs to get out more." FML

Today, I lost a bet with my friends. I had to go to the super market and buy a copy of 50 Shades of Grey along with a cucumber. The cashier was trying so hard not to laugh while ringing me up. FML

#20516035
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39143) - you deserved it (10339)

On 02/21/2013 at 8:43am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, my husband and I were fooling around in the shower. For some reason, I thought it'd be a good idea to grab his man meat and show him how to wash someone at a nursing home. He said he'd never be turned on by a nurse again. I'm a nurse. FML

#20515797
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10967) - you deserved it (37448)

On 02/21/2013 at 12:51am - love - by tomedicalforlove -

Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML

#20512214
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10925) - you deserved it (35379)

On 02/18/2013 at 2:11pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. As I shook her father's hand, he squeezed with an ungodly amount of force, leaned in with a smile, and murmured that my balls will be the next thing he'll crush if his daughter ever complains about me. FML

#20511181
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33980) - you deserved it (5288)

On 02/17/2013 at 7:11pm - love - by daniel55 (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my girlfriend and I decided to take a jog in an area we never been before. We then got lost. She actually thought that the tattoo on her arm of an open compass with north, east, south, and west would help us. FML

#20510517
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31034) - you deserved it (5643)

On 02/17/2013 at 9:27am - misc - by omgstuupidd - United States (New York)

Today, I was making love to my boyfriend. He put me up against the wall and I yelled, "Harder!" without thinking. I heard the entire house go silent, my dad and his friends included. FML

#20508952
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18549) - you deserved it (53616)

On 02/16/2013 at 12:27am - intimacy - by uhoh (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, the company I was fired from three years ago merged with the company I work at now. The new owners' first order of business was to fire me again. FML

#20508810
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42617) - you deserved it (2792) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/15/2013 at 8:37pm - work - by Nico - Sent from mobile version

Today, while at the store with my mom, we ran into the girl I recently confessed to being interested in. My mom decided to shout, "IS THAT HER?! IS THAT THE GIRL YOU LIKE?!" Embarrassed, I desperately told her to be quiet. She grounded me for being "rude" to her. FML

#20508609
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34725) - you deserved it (3307)

On 02/15/2013 at 7:39pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Italy (Lombardia)

Today, my dad lost his mind over the meteorite incident in Russia. He's convinced that it's part of some big government conspiracy to cover up a UFO crash-landing, and now he won't stop dismissively calling us "sheep" and telling us "do the research" just because we don't agree with him. FML

#20508499
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23598) - you deserved it (2763)

On 02/15/2013 at 6:00pm - misc - by dadsadipshit - United States

Today, my girlfriend finally said that she finally felt ready to have sex with me. It ended up being so terrible that I only managed to get some pleasure out of it when my mind drifted to the thought of going to Olive Garden later and eating some of their breadsticks. FML

#20508270
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38352) - you deserved it (9368)

On 02/15/2013 at 2:50pm - intimacy - by Acolyte of the Bacon God (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I worked up my courage and took an elevator for the first time in my life. Unfortunately, it was also my first time getting trapped for several hours in an elevator. FML

#20507764
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35657) - you deserved it (3571)

On 02/15/2013 at 2:18am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I felt frisky, so I did my hair and put on make-up and some lingerie. I walked into the living room, where my husband was playing a video game. He glanced up, said, "Oh, for fuck's sake." and made me wait nearly 15 minutes for him to reach a save-game point. FML

#20506870
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36264) - you deserved it (8079)

On 02/14/2013 at 6:00pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Staffordshire)



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