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About IsotropicMurphy : For years I've been testing Murphy's laws (the hard way) in many countries: they never fail!
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, my boyfriend and I tried to give his cat medicine. Unfortunately, it reacted in a way it never had before: clawed his arms to bits, bit him so hard a tooth fell out, peed everywhere, including on me, and pooped on the carpet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22858) - you deserved it (4011)
On 06/09/2011 at 3:20am - animals - by CatLady (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting it on for the first time. Just as I was about to climax, I spotted my greatest fear, a big wasp, only a few inches away from me. I shuddered and made a very unmanly orgasm wail. She now refuses to have sex because she says I "turned her off forever". FML
I agree, your life sucks (30712) - you deserved it (7924)
On 06/07/2011 at 4:07pm - intimacy - by Punk (man) - United States
Today, my Facebook was hacked. The hacker messaged all my online friends, explaining that "I" was overseas, had run out of money and needed help. Not one person cared enough to respond. I guess the hacker picked the wrong target. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24148) - you deserved it (3096)
On 06/07/2011 at 8:10am - money - by Username - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I discovered my mother went into the local pub where I work part time, got very drunk, and flashed her boobs at everyone. I found out when a picture was posted on Facebook. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26537) - you deserved it (1983)
On 06/06/2011 at 9:13am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)
Today, I woke up to my Playstation 3 and my laptop missing and window open. My dad faked a robbery to see me freak out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25753) - you deserved it (4806)
On 06/06/2011 at 3:06am - misc - by dwhite032 - United States (Indiana)
Today, I used a fire extinguisher for the first time. Too bad it was on my car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19136) - you deserved it (2236)
On 06/06/2011 at 12:48am - misc - by Username - United States
Today, at my job as a lifeguard, the kids in the pool decided to start a new game. The game involved spreading out to different parts of the pool and pretending to be drowning at the same time. Whoever was "saved" first, won. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36215) - you deserved it (2441)
On 06/04/2011 at 2:15am - work - by zain - United States (Texas)
Today, we finally got wireless Internet. My mom won't let us open any doors or windows in fear that it might "let the Internet out". It's 103 degrees in here. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45898) - you deserved it (3083)
On 06/02/2011 at 5:45am - health - by meyo555 - United States (Nebraska)
Today, I came home from work, only to find the babysitter passed out on the couch with a bottle of Jack Daniel's. At some point, it seems my son had taken the liberty of peeing on her while she slept. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29688) - you deserved it (4227)
On 05/27/2011 at 6:09pm - kids - by diddlebuag - United States (Ohio)
Today, I got in a car accident on the way to work. I received an abusive phone call from my boss saying he shouldn't have to cover my lazy ass. I was driving to cover his shift because he was too drunk to show up to work. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26170) - you deserved it (1980)
On 04/04/2011 at 10:03pm - work - by patch91 -
Today, my tampon string was hanging from my bathing suit. My boyfriend thought it was a thread hanging from my bikini bottom. He publicly pulled out my tampon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (252590) - you deserved it (34055)
On 04/03/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by rebekah (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I fell asleep in class. As a joke, my professor used an airhorn to wake me up. I got so freaked out that I punched the girl next to me in the face. She got knocked out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (69995) - you deserved it (23446)
On 03/23/2009 at 3:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
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