Ismellpurple

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Ismellpurple

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1308
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Ismellpurple's page activity

Visits<b>aLiYaaH</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 12:19pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 07/30/2013 at 9:15pm<b>KoGWitness</b> - the 05/30/2013 at 9:28pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 05/26/2013 at 12:03am

Ismellpurple's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

See all of Ismellpurple's badges

Ismellpurple's favorite FMLs

Today, I was taking a patient's blood pressure, and listening for his pulse with my stethoscope. I couldn't hear anything, so I adjusted the cuff and tried again. Still no pulse. He pointed out that my stethoscope was the wrong way around and sneered, "You been smokin' the reefer, boy?" FML

by no sir I have not / 03/07/2013 at 7:35pm / United States / Work

Today, I woke up next to my boss naked. We are both women and she is married. Work should be interesting tomorrow. FML

by BigBananaLover / 09/26/2011 at 2:20pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I realized that my wife is such a bitch normally, she's actually nicer when she is on her period. FML

by Username / 07/09/2011 at 12:32am / United States / Love

Today, I realized that my wife is such a bitch normally, she's actually nicer when she is on her period. FML

by Username / 07/09/2011 at 12:32am / United States / Love

Today, I found out that as a supervisor, if you reprimand a female worker and end the conversation with "Now get back to making sandwiches." your boss will consider it sexism and suspend you. I work at Subway. FML

by MakeMeASandwich / 06/10/2011 at 1:01am / United States (Illinois) / Work

Today, I spent almost two hours cleaning my fish tank, only to find out that my cat had secretly eaten all of my fish while I was cleaning the tank. FML

by Anonymous / 03/14/2011 at 3:52pm / United States / Animals

Today, I was busily having fun with my girlfriend, when suddenly the bedroom door opened and a man walked in, picked me up, and threw me outside the apartment. I was naked and didn't even know she was into men, much less had a husband. FML

by Katrina / 02/13/2011 at 5:32pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Intimacy

Today, I accidentally said, "Bye, love you," to a co-worker as I clocked out. Before I made it home, I had six missed calls and a long text from my co-worker professing her love to me. FML

by Anonymous / 01/28/2011 at 2:55pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, I was doing my grocery shopping, absent-mindedly wondering if my new diet was working. I got my answer when my panties fell down around my ankles. FML

by knickersdontfit / 01/26/2011 at 12:44pm / United States (New Jersey) / Health

Today, whilst driving to the store, an idiot driver found it to be okay to drive ridiculously fast in below freezing temperatures on the ice and snow. As he passed my car, I angrily gave him the finger. And then I realized I was wearing mittens. FML

by Anonymous / 11/25/2010 at 12:24am / United States (Washington) / Transportation

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my doctor told me to buy some KY Jelly and a dildo to help "loosen me up" so sex isn't so painful. I haven't been able to have sex for 6 months because it hurts so badly, and now my doctor has basically told me to go fuck myself. FML

by painfulintercourse / 11/22/2010 at 2:36pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend asked me to meet his parents over Christmas. I was ecstatic. But there was one condition: I must go dressed as a girl since he hasn't worked up the nerve to come out to his parents yet. We've been dating for over a year. FML

by neverdateaclosetcase / 11/17/2010 at 1:16pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, my girlfriend of two years broke up with me. She wants to try dating women. This is the second time this has happened to me. FML

by Anonymous / 11/15/2010 at 8:54pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, after moving house, changing my number, my email, and beginning legal action to get away from a girl who was stalking me, I decided to go to the movies to relax. As soon as I got in my seat, that same girl walked into the nearly empty theatre. She sat next to me. FML

by Anonymous / 11/05/2010 at 5:19am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, I went into a haunted house. Around 30 seconds into the adventure, I couldn't stop screaming at the top of my lungs from all of the scares. Suddenly, the little girl ahead of me, who was all by herself, turned around and told me to "suck it up and grow a pair, loser." FML

by Anonymous / 11/01/2010 at 7:56pm / Canada (Manitoba) / Kids