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Isamermaid

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Isamermaid
  • Town/Country : Albuquerque, NM
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 23 June 1990 (23 years)
  • Number of visits : 1533
  • Number of comments : 137
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About Isamermaid : ^ ...pimpin' in the bathroom. Hey, at least I do my own laundry.

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Isamermaid's favorite FMLs

Today, my drunk mother got into a fight with the lady at Krystal burger. Why? "Because the bitch said they aren't making special orders." FML

#8085656
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18678) - you deserved it (2098)

On 02/10/2010 at 10:10am - misc - by Krit - United States

Today, I realized that 6 months ago I signed up for a 3 day trial for a porn website that turns into a $30 membership after 3 days. I completely forgot the day after and never viewed it. I've spent $180 so far. And I can't remember my password. FML

#5573814
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7338) - you deserved it (56196)

On 09/30/2009 at 9:22pm - money - by GetMoney (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my girlfriend of eight years explained to me that the Egyptian pyramids were built by aliens from Mars. I have a B.S. in Biology and an M.S. in Anthropology, and I am working on my Ph.D. She thinks I'm an irrational idiot for telling her she is wrong. FML

#3970394
349 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39273) - you deserved it (7718)

On 07/23/2009 at 2:13am - work - by published_anthropologist (man) - United States

Today, I meant to express to my friends that I was enamored with a young saleswoman I had encountered at a store. I wanted to tell them that she was quite petite and that I am, in general, attracted to petite women. Instead I said "You know? I like little girls." FML

#2556869
274 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15123) - you deserved it (43845)

On 06/03/2009 at 1:23am - love - by boinger (man) - United States (California)

Today, my last task for the day as a high school janitor was to power-wash the concrete area where the graduation ceremony will take place. Tired and bored, I drew a huge penis with the power hose. Right before I was going to wash it off, the machine broke. Graduation is tomorrow. FML

#2350763
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15007) - you deserved it (65110)

On 05/27/2009 at 7:10pm - work - by waterproblem (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my cat was hit by a car. I took it to the vet expecting the worst but they told me that she’d be fine. I was so happy I didn't even mind paying the $50 bill. The next morning my cat was dead. Having her put down humanely would have cost $45, I paid $5 extra to have her die in my kitchen. FML

#2137962
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51129) - you deserved it (3457)

On 05/21/2009 at 4:06am - animals - by georgia819 - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I got on an elevator with a woman and her child. I was the first one on. When she stepped on, the capacity alarm went off. As she left she told her daughter that's why fat people shouldn't be allowed in public. I'm 145 lbs. She was twice my size. I got called fat by a hippopotamus. FML

#721846
305 comments

I agree, your life sucks (159125) - you deserved it (9653)

On 03/31/2009 at 10:17am - health - by warp_routine (woman) - United States (Vermont)



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  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

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