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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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Insert_Wit_Here
  • Town/Country : Halifax, Canada
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 29 October 1989 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 45449
  • Number of comments : 101
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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Insert_Wit_Here's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend of 3 years left me for a guy whose favorite color is camouflage. FML

#8612745 (301)

I agree, your life sucks (26038) - you deserved it (3008)

On 02/24/2010 at 10:29am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was falling asleep on my desk, my head on my fist. My elbow slipped off the edge of the desk and I punched myself, leaving a fist mark on my cheek. At school, people think my parents hit me. My parents think I'm getting bullied at school. No one believes the actual story. FML

#6213583 (75)

I agree, your life sucks (21751) - you deserved it (3455)

On 11/08/2009 at 3:44pm - misc - by bob (man) - Mexico (Distrito Federal)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, in the middle of the night, I was punched in the face by my frightened girlfriend who had just been awakened by her own fart. FML

#5550225 (167)

I agree, your life sucks (51892) - you deserved it (3372)

On 09/29/2009 at 5:21pm - love - by P0wned (man) - France (Bretagne)

Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on his couch when suddenly I tried to get up. Before I could stand, he grabs onto me and says, "I'm a koala and you're my eucalyptus tree!" He then continued to latch onto me for a good five minutes pretending to eat my hair. FML

#4046377 (746)

I agree, your life sucks (81739) - you deserved it (24046)

On 07/26/2009 at 1:57am - love - by treegirl (woman) - United States

Today, I learned that when you flush the toilet, the contents do not disappear into oblivion. They show up in your basement when your sewer backs up. And they come in greater numbers. FML

#3794107 (82)

I agree, your life sucks (40767) - you deserved it (2548)

On 07/16/2009 at 3:26am - misc - by megxox (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my friend put a bunch of cheetos all over me at the beach while I was taking a nap. Next thing I know I'm being woken up by a bunch of seagulls attacking me. One pooped in my hair. FML

#3792988 (82)

I agree, your life sucks (34989) - you deserved it (3178)

On 07/16/2009 at 2:30am - misc - by kewlcat (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I learned that walking on the sidewalk does not mean that you will not be hit by a car. FML

#3791674 (317)

I agree, your life sucks (64058) - you deserved it (2420)

On 07/16/2009 at 1:32am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my little brother learned that breaking a glow stick and emptying it into someone's eyes does not help them see in the dark. It's a good lesson, I just wish he hadn't used my eyes to learn it. The doctor says the burning feeling should go away in 3 or 4 days. FML

#3503017 (127)

I agree, your life sucks (41963) - you deserved it (3323)

On 07/05/2009 at 12:10pm - health - by blinded (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my mom put some bubblewrap on my desk because she thought I would have fun with it. I'm 18. It was awesome. FML

#3229865 (454)

I agree, your life sucks (51835) - you deserved it (26219)

On 06/26/2009 at 2:13am - misc - by Jeweler (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I took a late night drive, and after a while he stopped at a gas station and asked if I wanted anything I replied "guess". He came out and gave me a box of tampons. Apparently I've been bitchy. FML

#3112345 (231)

I agree, your life sucks (11077) - you deserved it (46676)

On 06/22/2009 at 3:47am - misc - by tamp (woman) - United States (Montana)

Today, I spent the whole day seeing how many licks it would take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop: 763. I'm 24. FML

#2209832 (393)

I agree, your life sucks (41157) - you deserved it (15446)

On 05/23/2009 at 12:15pm - misc - by Tootsy_Roll_Pop (man) - United States