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Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
It’s in the can
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Today, my boyfriend and I bought a brand new 72" flatscreen TV. After getting it hooked up and working, we went out for a smoke. Hearing this crashing and smashing noise, I went inside to find out my 2 year old daughter had found a metal pole and decided to use it on the TV. FML
Today, while in our communal showers in the highschool football locker room, I started to swing my penis around because it feels good and I was alone. Two minutes later the rest of the team hops into the shower with me. 30 dudes, one self-induced boner. FML
Today, I was doing a Power Point presentation to the management committee. Outlook Express was still open, and right in the middle of the presentation, a window popped up notifying me of a new message. "Subject: our reply to your application for the post of Marketing Manager". FML
Tuesday 22 July 2014