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About Incitatus : Today, this person was reading my description. I don't even know them. And it isn't even funny. FML
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I figured out why my name is Ashley. In order to tell my older sister about getting a new little sister, my parents thought it would be a good idea to make her imaginary friend "Ashley" real. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19387) - you deserved it (1897)
On 12/18/2010 at 4:03am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I discovered that the painful eczema I get every winter was actually being caused by the moisturising cream I use to treat it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18976) - you deserved it (2724)
On 12/16/2010 at 7:06am - health - by spleg (man) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)
Today, I was listening to music while I wrapped Christmas presents. All was going well when the music was cut off, literally. I snipped the cable to my very expensive headphones in half. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8814) - you deserved it (20868)
On 12/15/2010 at 12:22pm - money - by Username - United Kingdom (Reading)
Today, my toddler stood up in the shopping cart and fell giving himself a black eye. Later while at a restaurant he tried to stand up in his highchair. I quickly blurted out "Sit down! Do you want another one of those?" while pointing at his eye. Now the waiter wont stop glaring at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31168) - you deserved it (7293)
On 12/15/2010 at 12:42am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)
Today, I went to check if my neighbours were home to return their dog, having looked after her for a few days. I looked in the window and the place was empty. They'd moved house and stuck us with their dog. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21176) - you deserved it (2214)
On 12/11/2010 at 12:16am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via facebook. I don't even have a facebook. My friends had to tell me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26115) - you deserved it (2141)
On 12/11/2010 at 12:05am - love - by itsover (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, while browsing YouTube, I looked at the section "Recommended for You." I saw a video titled "How to get a girlfriend." Even YouTube thinks I can't get one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20202) - you deserved it (3587)
On 12/10/2010 at 6:59pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, I went to my local pharmacy. Walking in, the security guard rudely asked me what I was going to buy. I brushed him off and walked in. I was paying and told the cashier what happened. She said "Sorry, we get a lot of hobos, they tend to steal." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18554) - you deserved it (3281)
On 12/10/2010 at 6:37am - misc - by iamnotuseless -
Today, I finally worked up the courage to tell my mom that I'm gay. She sympathetically patted my back and told me I don't need to make up excuses for me being so unattractive to women. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24825) - you deserved it (3658)
On 12/10/2010 at 3:24am - misc - by augh -
Today, my wife was complaining she always has to put up the Christmas tree. So this year while she was out shopping, I decided to put it up. I set it too close to the fireplace and it caught fire. I'm a firefighter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8761) - you deserved it (25864)
On 12/10/2010 at 12:11am - misc - by 479firefighter -
Today, I was Rizzo in a production of Grease. I sang a line about needing a ring. I've been able to put up my left ring finger for every rehearsal, but today I put up the one next it. I flipped off the audience. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7580) - you deserved it (12873)
On 12/08/2010 at 9:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I went to see a famous rapper perform. My girlfriend got us up to the front to get pictures with him. He went to give me a high-five, I thought it was a fist-bump, so I made a fist. So he made a fist while I made a palm to match his retracted high-five. Then I panicked, cupped his fist and ran. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8326) - you deserved it (18418)
On 11/26/2010 at 10:43am - misc - by blackitalian - United States
Today, I discovered that for the past 4 years my mother has been slipping meat into my food because she thinks my vegetarianism is a "stupid hippie fad." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21002) - you deserved it (13624)
On 11/26/2010 at 9:17am - misc - by veggieweggie (woman) - United States (Delaware)
Today, I found out my stalker is my mom's new boyfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26242) - you deserved it (1890)
On 11/26/2010 at 8:15am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Leicestershire)
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house for dinner with his family. His mom cooked up a steak dinner, except that I'm a vegan, but trying to be a good girlfriend, I forced it down. Upon his mother finding out I was a vegan, she called me "disloyal to my beliefs." FML
I agree, your life sucks (11122) - you deserved it (23805)
On 11/25/2010 at 10:28pm - misc - by saywhat (woman) - United States (California)
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