About ImaginaryLight : You're my beautiful liar.
ImaginaryLight's FML badges
What'cha looking at?
You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.
I like your style
You've liked someone. How cute!
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
ImaginaryLight's favorite FMLs
Today, while watching tv at my mother's house, a tornado warning came across the screen. After being in the dark nasty basement for half an hour, my mom realizes she was watching a recorded show, and that tornado warning was for 2 weeks ago. FML
by cargaljen / 08/07/2011 at 1:29am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to Walmart to get some acne cream. As I approached the register, I looked in my wallet for the money. The cashier saw that I didn't have enough money, and before I could say anything, he goes "Just take it, I've never seen anyone who needs it that much!" FML
by Taylor D / 08/07/2011 at 12:40am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
Today, my girlfriend freaked out on me because I answered her call on the first ring. According to her, it implies that I'm desperate, always horny, and just want her for the sex. Just last week she got pissed because I waited three rings to answer. Apparently that means I'm cheating on her. FML
by FML! / 08/06/2011 at 8:27pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love
by Tabby / 08/06/2011 at 4:39pm / United Kingdom / Kids
by pimples / 08/06/2011 at 9:08am / Australia (Queensland) / Love
by nomorecookies / 08/06/2011 at 1:53am / United States (Missouri) / Transportation
by ashlyn / 08/06/2011 at 1:41am / United States (Michigan) / Love
by meach / 08/06/2011 at 12:58am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love
Today, my house was raided for drugs. I had to find out my father is a drug dealer. The cops then told me this wasn't their first time here, but it was the first time I was home to see it. They said it was nice to finally meet me. FML
by thehumanshield / 08/05/2011 at 4:41am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, the guy I've had the biggest crush on came to my house to pick me up for our first date. As we were leaving, my father screams out "Do you still have diarrhea?" I don't have diarrhea. My dad thinks he's so funny. FML
by Anon / 08/04/2011 at 4:30am / United States (Nevada) / Love
by doomeddaddy / 08/03/2011 at 12:46pm / United States (Ohio) / Kids
Today, I went bowling with my parents. This cute guy works there and he always flirts with me. My mom just so happened to see it today. As we left, she says to him "You know she's 13, right?" I'm 17. FML
by Michelle / 08/03/2011 at 2:01am / United States (Maryland) / Love
by soccerbuddyz / 08/03/2011 at 12:04am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, I realized that since I started working full time, the only friend I have left is my cat. Lonely and bored out of my mind, I told him about my day. He decided to end the conversation by shitting on the floor. FML
by Username / 07/29/2011 at 3:17pm / United States (South Carolina) / Animals
Today, while walking home, the gods were kind enough to grace me with the sight of an old man jogging past me in nothing but a pair of short shorts. The image of his balls swinging to and fro underneath like a pendulum has been forever burned into my retinas. FML
by someone / 07/29/2011 at 2:26pm / United States / Intimacy