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Illiandray

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Illiandray

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 21 February 1998 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 39
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Illiandray's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally told my dad that I hate his girlfriend. I said her daughter's a complete whore, and her son is annoying as fuck. Turns out they were in the house and within earshot, ready to throw me a birthday party. FML

#21243310
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23602) - you deserved it (43668)

On 08/22/2014 at 6:18pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I stuck one of those "kick me" signs on my friend's back for fun, and someone took the invitation. Unfortunately, my friend whirled around and beat the shit out of him. I managed to sneak the sign off his back, but now I feel like a total asshole. FML

#21243070
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19025) - you deserved it (44397)

On 08/22/2014 at 10:35am - misc - by oops (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my new doctor gave me a breast exam and said everything was healthy, before adding "Well, I think so, anyway. I don't actually work here." As I freaked out, he laughed out loud, said he was just kidding, and that he should prescribe me a chill pill. FML

#21241090
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41527) - you deserved it (5686)

On 08/19/2014 at 4:46pm - health - by humdrummitydrum (woman) - United States

Today, I was hammered, and on my way home I walked into a policeman. My logic was: if I'm on the phone, he can't talk to me, so I pulled my phone out and started speaking. The officer then asked me why I was speaking to my wallet. FML

#21240900
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24243) - you deserved it (44598)

On 08/19/2014 at 9:37am - misc - by drunk under 18 teenager (man) - Morocco (Marrakech-Tensift-Al Haouz)

Today, I went to a café and got some soup. When I was done, a nice waiter came over and offered to take my mostly empty soup bowl. I quickly at the last of it, looked up smiling and said "thanks". The soup dribbled out of my mouth and onto his hand. FML

#21237898
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34843) - you deserved it (9904)

On 08/15/2014 at 1:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I hooked up with a girl at a club, and we had sex. She just lay there like a corpse the whole time. It got so bad, I ended up faking an orgasm and blaming the lack of semen on a botched vasectomy. She actually believed it. What the hell? FML

#21235982
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39596) - you deserved it (9154)

On 08/12/2014 at 4:24pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, was the first day my grandma has seen me since I started going to tanning beds. She is now considering taking me out of her will because I look like "a damn Indian". FML

#21235555
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25519) - you deserved it (31897)

On 08/12/2014 at 2:07am - misc - by kirstyrd - United States (Michigan)

Today, I heard my sister gagging in her room. She was doing it quietly, and I got pretty concerned, after hearing a lot about bulimia recently. I knocked, then heard a gasp, so I let myself in, only to see her on her knees and her boyfriend with his underwear around his ankles. FML

#21233355
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49110) - you deserved it (19390)

On 08/09/2014 at 3:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I found a piece of erotic fiction on my brother's computer. It involved two lesbian teenagers, who just so happened to have the same names and physical descriptions as my sister and me. FML

#21233221
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42653) - you deserved it (3782)

On 08/09/2014 at 11:43am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - India (Maharashtra)

Today, I finally felt ready for intimacy with my boyfriend, and I sent him a sexy picture of myself topless. He texted back, "Ewwwww." FML

#21232655
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43260) - you deserved it (6706)

On 08/08/2014 at 5:05pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Israel

Today, I fell asleep in the doctor's waiting room. When I woke up, the room was empty, and there was a $1 bill tucked into my cleavage. FML

#21232452
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35977) - you deserved it (5957)

On 08/08/2014 at 10:43am - misc - by freakedout (woman) - United States

Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML

#21228111
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49083) - you deserved it (21220)

On 08/03/2014 at 1:16am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, while wandering around the big city I just relocated to, I asked a seemingly pleasant-looking lady where the nearest library was. She told me to get lost, and started laughing. Then said she was just joking and gave me directions. I'm now standing in front of a gay strip joint. FML

#21225641
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42498) - you deserved it (4366)

On 07/31/2014 at 7:38am - misc - by lostintdot (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I walked in on my 15-year-old daughter stripping on Skype for strangers. FML

#21217343
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56415) - you deserved it (41706)

On 07/22/2014 at 1:39pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I walked in on my 15-year-old daughter stripping on Skype for strangers. FML

#21217343
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56415) - you deserved it (41706)

On 07/22/2014 at 1:39pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)



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