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Ilikeurfmls

Offline (the 11/04/2014 at 12:58pm) | Search for a member

Ilikeurfmls

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 18 December 1992 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5091
  • Number of comments : 83
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About Ilikeurfmls : Butts

Ilikeurfmls's page activity

Visits<b>Edogg215</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 4:31am<b>akacruz</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 7:18am<b>jayeterror775</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 4:00am<b>Elgaard</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 2:27am<b>urbantrashcan</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 11:11pm<b>BrianWinter</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 8:36pm<b>Dany93</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 2:07am<b>kAPISH</b> - the 05/23/2014 at 3:27pm<b>msmama1985</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 3:00am<b>blackhawkdown69</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 8:22pm<b>recklessryan</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 4:20pm<b>pplthinkimbad</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 2:43pm<b>coolsoccer1234</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 3:39pm<b>Laconic01</b> - the 04/11/2014 at 5:59pm<b>WhatsOpTic</b> - the 03/28/2014 at 10:15pm<b>badluckross</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 7:39am<b>steffysxe</b> - the 03/07/2014 at 6:33pm<b>Furby94</b> - the 01/24/2014 at 12:26am

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Ilikeurfmls's favorite FMLs

Today, I awoke to my husband talking to someone on the phone at 2am. I heard him say, "Baby you're making me hard." Immediately, I asked him who he was talking to. His response? "It's Jake, from State Farm." FML

#20562846
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79958) - you deserved it (8255)

On 03/27/2013 at 7:55pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I casually mentioned to my mom that my boyfriend of two years and I were thinking about moving in together. She looked me dead in the eye and said if I ever moved out, she'd throw me out of the house. I'm confused. FML

Today, a man attempted to sue my business for giving him food poisoning. I make soap. When I called the cops on him for disturbing the peace, I was told, "Maybe next time you'll put 'not edible' on your label." FML

#20561443
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32049) - you deserved it (3297)

On 03/26/2013 at 8:10pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found out that what my husband meant by "we should try swinging" is "I really want to have sex with this one friend of yours, and if you so much as make eye contact with any guy I'm going to totally flip out and threaten to kill him and you." FML

#20560730
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49088) - you deserved it (6496)

On 03/26/2013 at 8:07am - intimacy - by SwinginSolo (woman) - United States

Today, whilst texting my boyfriend on the train, I noticed the woman sitting next to me staring intently at my phone. After letting my boyfriend know, he sent a message saying, "Are we gonna involve the dog again? Last night was fun." She gasped and screamed that I'm a "twisted dog-humping bitch." FML

#20560035
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38565) - you deserved it (6677)

On 03/25/2013 at 8:28pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, while at my boyfriend's house, I needed to use the bathroom. I decided to be a good girlfriend and leave the seat up for him. He later yelled at me for not putting the seat down because he needed to take a dump. FML

#20557546
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32656) - you deserved it (8025)

On 03/24/2013 at 3:35am - love - by whatchagonnado - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my psycho abstinence-only sex ed teacher claimed condoms give 50% protection at most against pregnancy. I couldn't help but correct her. She apologized for her "mistake", saying, "It's just that we're not ALL sluts, Kara." Now everyone thinks I'm a raging whore. FML

#20555528
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40960) - you deserved it (6079)

On 03/22/2013 at 8:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, on Facebook, I mentioned that I'd just finished reading the novel Pet Sematary. Two hours later, I'd lost two friends and my boyfriend, after they commented "learn to spell, dumbass", "u illiterate fucker", and "well, I'm not dating you for your brains, am I?" I hate humanity. FML

#20555478
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32598) - you deserved it (7218)

On 03/22/2013 at 8:02pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was feeling a bit insecure about my body, and I told my boyfriend I don't know how he can even stand to have sex with me. He replied, "I know, right?" FML

#20555435
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36687) - you deserved it (17702)

On 03/22/2013 at 7:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out my mom thought I was a lesbian because I dated a girl in high school. I didn't date anyone in high school. Apparently, guys never asked me out because my best friend told everyone that I was her girlfriend. I had a two-year lesbian relationship that I never knew about. FML

#20554170
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47466) - you deserved it (3174)

On 03/21/2013 at 8:35pm - love - by SmallAngel (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my girlfriend confided in me that she wanted to try bondage. Since I trust her, I said sure. After I was tied to the bed, she tickled me until I pissed myself. FML

#20553692
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49123) - you deserved it (11634)

On 03/21/2013 at 1:54pm - intimacy - by ldn (man) - Slovenia (Bohinj)

Today, there was a new girl in one of my classes. We both corrected a classmate on his grammar, so, trying to make a new friend, I leaned back to her and said, "Haha, fellow Grammar Nazi?" She gave me a disgusted look and told me she was Jewish. FML

#20553379
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37829) - you deserved it (19402)

On 03/21/2013 at 6:43am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I found out why my boyfriend likes to do my hair and makeup for me. Far from it being some kind of fetish or hobby, it's because he thinks I do such a crappy job that feels he has to apply it himself so I don't "embarrass" him when we're out in public together. FML

#20543666
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30629) - you deserved it (11018)

On 03/14/2013 at 5:01pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Thuringen)

Today, I held hands with the boy I like. Without thinking, I commented that his right hand is softer, as if he only used lotion on that one hand. And then we stood there in terribly awkward silence. FML

#20541635
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41843) - you deserved it (15705)

On 03/13/2013 at 12:57am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, I held hands with the boy I like. Without thinking, I commented that his right hand is softer, as if he only used lotion on that one hand. And then we stood there in terribly awkward silence. FML

#20541635
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41843) - you deserved it (15705)

On 03/13/2013 at 12:57am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)



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