About Ilikeurfmls : YOLo fuCK BitChEs geT da MonYe DoEJust kidding if you really say that i'll probably hate you. I hate people. I don't think i'm funny or cleaver nor do I try to be. I just try and state the obvious. Most of my comments suck I know I just don't care. Oh and on 8/11/12 I met FIR Jacky said hi and asked me how I was doing while I kinda got ignored by Ronnie while my dad talked to him I stood there shaking. Nuff said about myself. I'm a fangirl what can I say. :x
I'm always on the app so if I don't respond to a message don't worry, I might not hate you.
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This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
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Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, my parents heard from my sister that I'd recently lost my virginity to my girlfriend. I've never been bitched out so viciously in my life, and yet my sister, whom everyone knows has had numerous casual sexual partners this year, is treated like a princess 24/7. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19315) - you deserved it (1324)
On 12/02/2012 at 1:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Suffolk)
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house when I got a call from my parents. They told me to come home immediately. Panicking, I rushed home. My dad pulled out a clear tube filled with dried leaves. They accused me of having marijuana. It was catnip for my kitten. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17227) - you deserved it (1059)
On 12/01/2012 at 9:01pm - misc - by potheadloljk (woman) - United States (Maine)
Today, I was watching a video from the 80s on sexual dysfunctions, and I noticed that one of the boys in the film looked strangely like my dad when he was younger. After a little investigation, I now know that in his youth, my dad had a crippling masturbation problem. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29601) - you deserved it (2075)
On 11/27/2012 at 4:04pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)
I agree, your life sucks (18578) - you deserved it (2404)
On 11/26/2012 at 8:41pm - love - by imnotacheateryouimmaturefuck (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he'd rather play the new Assassin's Creed game or have a night of sex with me. He started crying from indecision. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26119) - you deserved it (9194)
On 11/24/2012 at 8:54am - intimacy - by ladylol (woman) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)
Today, after having finally kicked my insomnia's ass after three hours, I was woken up by something I only thought happened in movies. Someone had paid for a Mariachi band to play for their girlfriend, outside my apartment, in the middle of the night. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17217) - you deserved it (1002)
On 11/23/2012 at 5:51pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my girlfriend dared me to put on her bra and panties and give her a lap dance. Feeling spontaneous, I decided to do it. Just as I was getting really into it, she told me I was on webcam for all her friends. Apparently it was a contest of who had their boyfriend the most whipped. She won. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36487) - you deserved it (9578)
On 11/23/2012 at 1:14am - intimacy - by Embarassed (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, my mom sold my Magic box at a garage sale because I "never use it." Locked inside it was my fake ID, a couple of hundred bucks, and a bag of weed. She can't remember who she sold it to. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11436) - you deserved it (21410)
On 11/19/2012 at 9:04pm - misc - by karmaquestionmark (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I sat on my balls while at a restaurant. As I was wincing in pain and readjusting myself, my girlfriend came and sat on my lap. She landed directly on my nuts. After a minute or two, I stood up, only to rack myself once again on the corner of the table. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23539) - you deserved it (4053)
On 11/16/2012 at 4:40am - misc - by mfischer (man) - United States
Today, I went to see a movie with three of my friends, and I was sharing popcorn with one of them. Halfway through the movie, my friend asked me why I wasn't eating our popcorn. I then realised I'd been taking popcorn from the man sitting next to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18574) - you deserved it (5208)
On 11/12/2012 at 12:27pm - misc - by mm (woman) - United Kingdom (Warrington)
Today, we found out that the beloved "Uncle Jimmy" from my early childhood was really the man my mother was cheating on my dad with. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17511) - you deserved it (841)
On 11/09/2012 at 3:53pm - misc - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Gisborne)
Today, I had my first orgasm. I also came to the realization that whenever I orgasm I get an uncontrollable case of hiccups for at least half an hour afterwards. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18222) - you deserved it (1948)
On 11/03/2012 at 11:52am - intimacy - by hiccups - United States (New York)
Today, I had surgery on my arm. My mom has recently had the same surgery and my dad is having his first rib removed and won't be able to move his arm. My family combined now has three functioning arms. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16572) - you deserved it (1146)
On 11/01/2012 at 1:08am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)
Today, my boyfriend of a year broke up with me by saying, "It's not you, it's me. I have a terrible taste in women." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20912) - you deserved it (2042)
On 10/30/2012 at 9:27am - love - by LonelyMe -
Today, my mom decided to wake me up by pouring ice cold water on my face. Again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14168) - you deserved it (2751)
On 10/28/2012 at 6:43am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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