Ilikeurfmls

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Offline (the 11/04/2014 at 12:58pm)

Ilikeurfmls

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 18 December 1992 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 10933
  • Number of comments : 83
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About Ilikeurfmls : Butts

Ilikeurfmls's page activity

Visits<b>justarandomalien</b> - 4 hours ago<b>Maximusmime</b> - the 07/04/2016 at 4:03pm<b>Jonjon554</b> - the 05/15/2016 at 7:23pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 12:33pm<b>cmat84</b> - the 03/23/2016 at 7:48am<b>kbnaamany</b> - the 03/22/2016 at 1:56pm<b>CringePotato</b> - the 03/14/2016 at 3:50pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 02/29/2016 at 4:56pm<b>jen1097</b> - the 02/28/2016 at 11:46am<b>thatonekidalex33</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 9:56am<b>TyroneLeBron</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 12:31pm<b>Life_sucksXx</b> - the 01/19/2016 at 1:51pm<b>samrompain</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 9:18pm<b>cloco87</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 4:56am<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 12/13/2015 at 11:18pm<b>stereofeathers</b> - the 10/16/2015 at 8:41am<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 09/29/2015 at 4:39pm<b>Raelthelamb</b> - the 09/28/2015 at 11:02pm

Fucked!<b>Jonjon554</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 1:21am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 6:33pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 02/29/2016 at 10:56pm<b>Nathan23xx</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 2:58pm

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Ilikeurfmls's favorite FMLs

Today, I was going through my daughter's contacts, except all of them had names from Harry Potter. I found the name "Mom." I was relieved I didn't have some silly name, until I realized it wasn't my number; it was her father's new wife. My number was under "Voldemort." FML

by Jill / 06/15/2013 at 12:19am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, after dating for almost a year, I decided to introduce my parents to the man I was sure I'd fallen in love with. When dad saw him, his and my boyfriend's face completely dropped. I asked them what was wrong because I could feel the discomfort. Turns out, I'm dating my dad's drug dealer. FML

by explanations / 06/14/2013 at 2:48am / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, my boyfriend dumped me, accusing me of lying to him about "being a hermaphrodite". His almost total lack of knowledge about female anatomy led him to believe that my clitoris is actually an extremely tiny penis. FML

by Hannah / 06/13/2013 at 12:19pm / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy

Today, after years of researching and saving money, I got a pet fox. I was able to enjoy the majesty of the animal for three hours before it burrowed under the fence and ran away. FML

by SadFoxLady / 06/10/2013 at 2:01pm / United States (Iowa) / Animals

Today, I went to the local pharmacy to buy some condoms. When I went to go purchase them, the elderly lady behind the counter took one look at me and said, "Honey, you're your own birth control." FML

by Anonymous / 06/09/2013 at 10:29am / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. She pulled down my trousers, saw my Poke-ball boxers, and absolutely lost it. I had to lie next to her in bed for the next 10 minutes hearing her howl with laughter while crying "Dickachu, I choose you!" FML

by Anonymous / 06/07/2013 at 3:10am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, I went to the gym for the first time in a while. I was doing upper body workouts and decided to ask a very large man to spot me while I did bench presses. As he stood over me, I saw two beads of sweat roll off his nose. One hit me on the cheek. The other landed in my open mouth. FML

by dollabill009 / 06/06/2013 at 4:49am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, after finally seeing a psychologist about the death of my dad and spending the longest hour of my life confessing every thought I've experienced in the 6 years since his passing, my psychologist asked me if I was walking home or if my dad would be picking me up. FML

by irishbubble / 06/04/2013 at 8:35am / Australia (New South Wales) / Health

Today, I was in bed with my fiancé. After a while of quiet cuddling, I said, "Babe, I have cold feet." He replied with, "Me too. Let's call off the wedding." I was talking about the actual temperature of my feet. Our wedding is tomorrow. FML

by anonymous / 05/26/2013 at 8:23am / Australia / Love

Today, while on an escalator, instead of just telling me my underwear label was hanging out of my jeans, a woman behind me decided to tuck the label in herself. You should never have to feel a stranger's finger on your butt crack. FML

by violatedbuttcrack / 05/16/2013 at 6:24am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, the regional manager of my company came out to do some performance reviews. I was so nervous that my palms were sweaty, and when he reached out to shake my hand, I blurted out, "I'm sorry, you made me wet." FML

by Anonymous / 05/13/2013 at 8:01am / Australia (Queensland) / Work

Today, I found out that my wife is having an affair with the same guy my ex-wife left me for. FML

by Anonymous / 05/06/2013 at 2:13pm / Ireland (Donegal) / Love

Today, my mom came back from a major surgery. She also had a yeast infection. I had to push the applicator in because she couldn't bend down. This cannot be unfelt. FML

by asausa / 05/04/2013 at 7:26pm / United States (Virginia) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML

by wtfmama / 05/04/2013 at 8:51am / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids

Today, my wife shaved her pubic hair so that it resembles Hitler's mustache. She won't stop referring to it as "the Clitler". FML

by Anonymous / 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous