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Ilikeurfmls

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Ilikeurfmls
  • Town/Country : Usa
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 18 December 1992 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 2954
  • Number of comments : 83
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Ilikeurfmls : Butts

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Today, I was chatting with a cute guy on Omegle. He seemed really friendly and interested after I had showed him a picture of me. When I mentioned that I play music, he seemed even more interested, so I gave him the link to my music Myspace. I waited patiently. He disconnected. FML

#8602827
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7903) - you deserved it (19549)

On 02/23/2010 at 10:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my boss made me some tortellini for lunch. As I was happily eating it, he started to give me a massage, while talking to his friends in Greek. He told me that he said "She's my #1 cashier." Turns out, what he really said was "See, if you feed them well, they let you touch them." FML

#8576368
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24780) - you deserved it (4986)

On 02/23/2010 at 12:17am - work - by meaganlea (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was working at Publix ringing up some 70 year old woman. She says "Man, you're a fast cashier, I like my men fast!" and then gives me a wink. I got really nervous and didn't know how to respond, so not thinking, I quickly said, "Yeah, me too." FML

#8565371
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22858) - you deserved it (6464)

On 02/22/2010 at 8:29pm - work - by Patrick (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was walking with a friend after buying two cups of steaming hot coffee. While crossing the busiest street in town I tripped and fell, spilling the coffee all over me. My friend didn't notice I fell right in front of her and tripped over me spilling her coffee on me as well. FML

#8528184
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18548) - you deserved it (2199)

On 02/21/2010 at 8:31pm - misc - by burnnnnn (woman) - Ecuador (Azuay)

Today, I got fired. To make things worse, I had to sit in three-hour bumper to bumper traffic, waiting for a wreck to clear on my way home. In front of me was a fat man with a hairy butt crack on a motorcycle. I was forced to stare at a fat, underwear-less man's ass for 3 hours. FML

#8395812
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21906) - you deserved it (3136)

On 02/18/2010 at 12:31am - work - by buttcrack (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my girlfriend was really depressed. I listed the top 50 reasons why I love her. Her response was "thanks for that but seriously, this video on youtube is hilarious." I couldn't cheer her up but apparently a 10 second video of a dog running in circles can. FML

#8238401
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24583) - you deserved it (2969)

On 02/14/2010 at 3:48am - love - by Samson (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was about to take a crap when the smoke alarm went off. I ran out of the bathroom and tried to run downstairs. I tripped and shit on myself. The alarm had gone off cause my kid put my wallet in the toaster. FML

#8051668
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33443) - you deserved it (4385)

On 02/09/2010 at 1:20pm - kids - by justme - Sent from mobile version

Today, I have the flu, food poisoning and I'm on my period. I have enough liquids pouring out of me from various holes to satisfy a sewer. FML

#8045354
280 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40490) - you deserved it (2753)

On 02/09/2010 at 7:22am - health - by SickSmick (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I was feeling hungry, so I went to the kitchen to get a bowl of cereal. I found hundreds of weevils festering in my Lucky Charms. FML

#7937291
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20508) - you deserved it (3599)

On 02/06/2010 at 1:48pm - misc - by annony-moose - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was walking by a pond when I saw a small frog. I decided to catch it to get a close look. After I picked it up, I realized that it was not a frog. It was dog shit shaped like a frog. FML

#7776158
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10680) - you deserved it (32009)

On 02/01/2010 at 9:34am - animals - by adad - Sent from mobile version

Today, I found out that my girlfriend had replaced our picture in her locket for a picture of Taylor Lautner shirtless. FML

#7724225
258 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28962) - you deserved it (5185)

On 01/30/2010 at 10:20pm - love - by Twilightsux (man) - United States

Today, after having been a vegetarian for 8 years because I'm opposed to cruelty to animals, I lost a bet and had to eat a whole cheeseburger. I loved it. FML

#7666116
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9475) - you deserved it (48992)

On 01/29/2010 at 2:25am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom asked me if I would be embarrassed if she got a tramp stamp. FML

#7651599
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24820) - you deserved it (2073)

On 01/28/2010 at 8:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was driving home from college when I saw a couple of sporty chicks jogging on the side of the road. I honked at them and yelled suggestively as I do at college, which usually gets a fun flirty reaction from college girls. It was my next-door neighbor and her 11 year old daughter. FML

#7587300
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4557) - you deserved it (45539)

On 01/26/2010 at 9:39am - misc - by Fonz (man) - United States (California)

Today, to my surprise my girlfriend said, "I've never felt this way before." We have been dating for six months, and I knew that I loved her, so I replied, "Me neither, I love you." There was a long awkward pause. Turns out, she was talking about her abnormally painful period cramps. FML

#7551805
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26582) - you deserved it (3718)

On 01/24/2010 at 7:50pm - love - by dan (man) - Canada (Ontario)



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