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Ilikeurfmls

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 18 December 1992 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3735
  • Number of comments : 83
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About Ilikeurfmls : Butts

Ilikeurfmls's page activity

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Ilikeurfmls's favorite FMLs

Today, my sister and I were both on Facebook, updating our statuses. I set mine to "just got released from hospital with Baby Lily", as I'd had a baby earlier this week. My sister set hers to "menstrual blood smells like shrimp". Her status got 37 likes. Mine got none. FML

#13469972
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32559) - you deserved it (6391)

On 10/16/2010 at 8:31am - love - by married (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was sitting in a lecture about the history of the KKK and the problems it has caused, when the weirdest and quietest kid leans over my shoulder and says "I'd burn you first..." and winks. FML

#13455190
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32322) - you deserved it (3193)

On 10/15/2010 at 2:00am - misc - by racist - United States

Today, I tried to put my friend's hand in lukewarm water while he was sleeping, to see if he'd pee himself. He woke up and punched me in the face. FML

#13426894
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5669) - you deserved it (58805)

On 10/12/2010 at 10:09pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had a wet dream about having sexual relations with a rubber duck. FML

#13373695
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29730) - you deserved it (8934)

On 10/09/2010 at 1:15am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, I received a 7 page text message during school from my mom yelling at me because I ate her cereal. FML

#13373250
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26314) - you deserved it (5257)

On 10/09/2010 at 12:39am - misc - by mylifesuckssss - United States

Today, I asked my mom why she decided to be a parent. She replied, in all seriousness, "Everyone else was doing it." FML

#13321505
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24093) - you deserved it (3342)

On 10/04/2010 at 8:57pm - kids - by ugh (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I caught my husband modeling my cute floral panties. All he could manage to say was "I love you." FML

#13274017
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26891) - you deserved it (4229)

On 10/01/2010 at 7:07am - intimacy - by canispankthat - United States (California)

Today, I was changing in the back seat of my new truck when it started to roll backwards. In my haste to reach the brake, I hit my head and fell face first into the steering wheel. I then realized that it wasn't rolling. The car next to me was just pulling out. FML

#13223022
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10237) - you deserved it (25507)

On 09/27/2010 at 3:22pm - misc - by milhouse86 (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was on my way home on an airplane. The guy I had to sit next to was reading a book with naked girls in it. About 15 minutes into the flight, he had an erection and started to giggle. It was a 2 hour flight. FML

#13124550
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32386) - you deserved it (2981)

On 09/20/2010 at 3:16am - intimacy - by Thomas - United States (Oregon)

Today, my boyfriend told me that he gets the same amount of entertainment out of tickling me and having sex with me, and he likes the tickling noises better. FML

#12782161
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24337) - you deserved it (6679)

On 08/28/2010 at 1:49am - intimacy - by JessykaB - United States

Today, I superglued my headphones back together. They weren't dry before I put them back in my ears. FML

Today, I was riding the public bus and a really fat, smelly guy sat next to me. He put his arm around my shoulder and asked me if I was single. My stop wasn't for three more miles. FML

#12760106
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33059) - you deserved it (3225)

On 08/26/2010 at 7:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend started talking to my breasts in public. As if that wasn't bad enough, he then started to jiggle them in his hands. FML

#12449213
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26640) - you deserved it (13694)

On 08/11/2010 at 5:16am - intimacy - by KBL3 (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my husband discovered that whispering anything in my ear will turn me on. He turned to me and whispered 'cheeseburger' in my ear. Unfortunately, I moaned. Now he now laughs about it with our roommate. FML

#12377816
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26002) - you deserved it (17387)

On 08/07/2010 at 9:05pm - intimacy - by Indigo_Kitten (woman) - United States (Florida)



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