Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Ilikeurfmls

Offline (the 10/22/2014 at 3:07am) | Search for a member

Ilikeurfmls

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 18 December 1992 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4620
  • Number of comments : 83
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About Ilikeurfmls : Butts

Ilikeurfmls's page activity

Visits<b>akacruz</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 7:18am<b>jayeterror775</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 4:00am<b>Elgaard</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 2:27am<b>urbantrashcan</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 11:11pm<b>BrianWinter</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 8:36pm<b>Dany93</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 2:07am<b>kAPISH</b> - the 05/23/2014 at 3:27pm<b>msmama1985</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 3:00am<b>blackhawkdown69</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 8:22pm<b>recklessryan</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 4:20pm<b>pplthinkimbad</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 2:43pm<b>coolsoccer1234</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 3:39pm<b>Laconic01</b> - the 04/11/2014 at 5:59pm<b>WhatsOpTic</b> - the 03/28/2014 at 10:15pm<b>badluckross</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 7:39am<b>steffysxe</b> - the 03/07/2014 at 6:33pm<b>Furby94</b> - the 01/24/2014 at 12:26am<b>xXChaosRoseXx</b> - the 12/06/2013 at 11:54pm

Ilikeurfmls's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

See all of Ilikeurfmls's badges

Ilikeurfmls's favorite FMLs

Today, I was reading a blog post by a girl that I really like. In the post, it said, "I know I'm not beautiful." I told her that I thought it wasn't true at all. She responded by crying hysterically and asking me why I would say that. It turned out that it actually said, "I know I'm beautiful." FML

#15714143
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21199) - you deserved it (28514)

On 04/09/2011 at 8:24pm - love - by Arran (man) - United Kingdom (Stoke-on-Trent)

Today, I learned that when I leave skid marks in the toilet my wife uses my toothbrush to remove them. FML

#15598918
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33447) - you deserved it (45110)

On 04/02/2011 at 1:03am - misc - by Toothy (man) - United States (California)

Today, I walked into a room, where a guy was violently picking his nose. He kept picking. A very pretty girl walked in after me, and he immediately stopped and sat up straight. Apparently, I'm too ugly to motivate strangers to stop excavating their nasal cavities. FML

#15546142
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32693) - you deserved it (4921)

On 03/29/2011 at 1:12pm - misc - by uggo - United States

Today, I was sitting beside a very cute girl on a 3 hour bus trip with my class. She fell asleep, head on my lap. She woke up because my erection was jabbing her in the cheek. FML

#15532710
483 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55172) - you deserved it (27681)

On 03/28/2011 at 4:13pm - intimacy - by dickface - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to work despite having a nasty cold. I didn't call up sick because last week when I called in, my boss said I was being "unprofessional and unacceptable." My boss sent me home with a written warning today, claiming that coming to work sick was "unprofessional and unacceptable." FML

#15431401
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36298) - you deserved it (3342)

On 03/22/2011 at 12:59pm - work - by SickandTired (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I called a wrong number. Calling back the right person, I began a long story about how I'd just called the wrong number. It was the wrong number lady again. FML

#15429029
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11134) - you deserved it (34031)

On 03/22/2011 at 8:38am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend in his bedroom. It was getting pretty intense, so he got up to close the door. While he was facing the other way, I took off my bra and sling-shot it so that it would hit him. Right when I let go of it, his mom walked in and it hit her in the face. FML

#15426482
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47750) - you deserved it (27082)

On 03/22/2011 at 1:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML

#15415559
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37152) - you deserved it (31497)

On 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)

Today, I looked in my mouse's cage and noticed a tiny weed growing. I've been trying to grow a garden for years to no avail. Even my mouse is a better gardener than I am. FML

#15104344
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22494) - you deserved it (9925)

On 02/24/2011 at 6:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, someone started an event on Facebook for tomorrow called Kick A Ginger Day. Over 300 people are attending. There are only two redheads in my school, and I'm one of them. FML

#15078337
435 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44231) - you deserved it (8751)

On 02/22/2011 at 1:30pm - misc - by Someone (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was in class when someone came in with a rose for me. My teacher made me read the card aloud: "I'm breaking up with you, happy Valentine's." It was from my boyfriend. FML

#14973711
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43100) - you deserved it (3035)

On 02/14/2011 at 1:14pm - love - by sexyredhead - United States

Today, to prevent a fistfight at work, I had to mediate a contested debate between two coworkers on what was evidently a very touchy subject: Which is better, the orange creamsicle or the ice cream sandwich? I was the only one to get in trouble for wasting company time. FML

#14917539
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23601) - you deserved it (4148)

On 02/10/2011 at 12:31am - work - by geoduck - United States

Today, my "friend" put itching powder in my cast while I was sleeping. FML

#14897237
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30555) - you deserved it (2326)

On 02/08/2011 at 4:39pm - health - by scratchy -

Today, I was leaving school to get tested for peptic ulcers, because my stomach has been hurting for a few months. To wish me luck, one of my friends gave me a friendly punch in the stomach. I threw up blood. FML

#14893456
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43387) - you deserved it (2714)

On 02/08/2011 at 7:48am - health - by soccerscout7 -

Today, one of my cats peed all over the back of my couch, so I put her outside for a while. When I let her in, she ran straight to the couch and peed on my laptop. This has been going on ever since I accidentally stepped on her tail, several months ago. FML

#14857654
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27823) - you deserved it (10890)

On 02/05/2011 at 8:58pm - animals - by UghCats (woman) - United States (Wyoming)



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: