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Ilikeurfmls

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Ilikeurfmls

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 18 December 1992 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4591
  • Number of comments : 83
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About Ilikeurfmls : Butts

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Ilikeurfmls's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to go to the hospital to get a harmonica removed from my mouth. FML

#17675757
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12538) - you deserved it (23889)

On 09/05/2011 at 10:52pm - health - by wheezy (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I'm getting kicked out of my flat because my drunk friends stole a pony and left it tied outside. FML

#17669700
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25910) - you deserved it (2992)

On 09/05/2011 at 11:03am - misc - by thefrightening1 (woman) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, at my dental practice, we received a shipment of the stupid flavoured gloves my boss ordered to make the place more "friendly to the kids". I started working in an adult patient's mouth, when he decided to start creepily making out with my fingers. FML

#17661211
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32225) - you deserved it (2670)

On 09/04/2011 at 12:42pm - work - by -- - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I got my first handjob. She ripped out a pube. It hurt so bad my eyes teared up. She asked what was wrong and not wanting to make her feel guilty I had to tell her it was "Just so good." FML

#17659578
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36008) - you deserved it (9413)

On 09/04/2011 at 5:36am - intimacy - by southernluxe - United States

Today, I asked my Dad if it was true that my mother had a C-section at my birth. He replied "Yeah, so technically you weren't even born, you were surgically removed, like a tumor." FML

#17638273
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34895) - you deserved it (4403)

On 09/01/2011 at 7:40pm - misc - by mannydanny (woman) - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, I played a Jazz gig. It rained, making the tent the band performed under heavy with water. When I stepped forward to play my solo, the front end of the tent collapsed under the weight of the rain, drenching me. FML

#17617354
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22265) - you deserved it (2194)

On 08/29/2011 at 11:56pm - misc - by TheJazzKid - United States (California)

Today, I got a text message from a number I don't know saying "I'm sorry, but I'm cheating on you, I couldn't do this in person because you're ugly when you cry." I haven't had a relationship in 6 years and I still manage to get dumped. FML

#17584361
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35642) - you deserved it (2672)

On 08/26/2011 at 7:09am - love - by j_babydoll6520 - Australia (Victoria)

Today, after waiting 3 months, I finally got my wedding dress back from the dry-cleaners. The dry cleaning lasted longer than the marriage. FML

#17583056
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33731) - you deserved it (8904)

On 08/26/2011 at 1:28am - love - by justmyluck - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my aunt and uncle stole $584 from me, since I'm moving out. Their reasoning? I stole things. When I asked what I'd stolen, my aunt looked me straight in the eye and said "Milk Duds." FML

#17566014
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30634) - you deserved it (2807)

On 08/24/2011 at 4:03am - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my stepbrother found my diary and read it. He then told my boyfriend how I had a crush on another guy, and no longer liked him, causing my boyfriend to break up with me. That diary was from the third grade. FML

#17535182
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38643) - you deserved it (3221)

On 08/21/2011 at 2:25am - love - by Tinkerer - United States (Oregon)

Today, I had to say "Put away your burrito," "that ruler is not a light saber," and "stop making dog noises" all in the same sentence at work. I teach Advanced Placement Calculus to high school seniors. FML

#17526799
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30419) - you deserved it (4650)

On 08/20/2011 at 3:42am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to say "Put away your burrito," "that ruler is not a light saber," and "stop making dog noises" all in the same sentence at work. I teach Advanced Placement Calculus to high school seniors. FML

#17526799
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30419) - you deserved it (4650)

On 08/20/2011 at 3:42am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, while riding in the car with my mother, we got into an argument, at which point she pulled the vehicle over, took the key out of the ignition and used it to turn off the passenger airbag. She then continued driving in silence. FML

#17526290
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33286) - you deserved it (4474)

On 08/20/2011 at 2:23am - misc - by W1D0 - United States (Illinois)

Today, after a tennis lesson, the coach was picking up the stray tennis balls around the court. Trying to be helpful, I asked him, "Do you want me to grab your ball bag?" His eyeballs almost burst out of their sockets. FML

#17512926
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26501) - you deserved it (7521)

On 08/18/2011 at 8:18pm - intimacy - by BigmouthStrikesAgain (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I walked outside my house to find my father in nothing but his underwear, spraying ants with ant-killer, laughing like a maniac and screaming, "Die bitches! Die!" FML

#17447180
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31820) - you deserved it (4279)

On 08/12/2011 at 2:17am - misc - by TuteSweet - United States (Connecticut)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

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FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

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