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Ilikeurfmls

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Ilikeurfmls

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 18 December 1992 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3724
  • Number of comments : 83
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About Ilikeurfmls : Butts

Ilikeurfmls's page activity

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Ilikeurfmls's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a text message from a number I don't know saying "I'm sorry, but I'm cheating on you, I couldn't do this in person because you're ugly when you cry." I haven't had a relationship in 6 years and I still manage to get dumped. FML

#17584361
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35526) - you deserved it (2668)

On 08/26/2011 at 7:09am - love - by j_babydoll6520 - Australia (Victoria)

Today, after waiting 3 months, I finally got my wedding dress back from the dry-cleaners. The dry cleaning lasted longer than the marriage. FML

#17583056
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33606) - you deserved it (8880)

On 08/26/2011 at 1:28am - love - by justmyluck - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my aunt and uncle stole $584 from me, since I'm moving out. Their reasoning? I stole things. When I asked what I'd stolen, my aunt looked me straight in the eye and said "Milk Duds." FML

#17566014
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30517) - you deserved it (2803)

On 08/24/2011 at 4:03am - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my stepbrother found my diary and read it. He then told my boyfriend how I had a crush on another guy, and no longer liked him, causing my boyfriend to break up with me. That diary was from the third grade. FML

#17535182
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38533) - you deserved it (3215)

On 08/21/2011 at 2:25am - love - by Tinkerer - United States (Oregon)

Today, I had to say "Put away your burrito," "that ruler is not a light saber," and "stop making dog noises" all in the same sentence at work. I teach Advanced Placement Calculus to high school seniors. FML

#17526799
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30306) - you deserved it (4638)

On 08/20/2011 at 3:42am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to say "Put away your burrito," "that ruler is not a light saber," and "stop making dog noises" all in the same sentence at work. I teach Advanced Placement Calculus to high school seniors. FML

#17526799
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30306) - you deserved it (4638)

On 08/20/2011 at 3:42am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, while riding in the car with my mother, we got into an argument, at which point she pulled the vehicle over, took the key out of the ignition and used it to turn off the passenger airbag. She then continued driving in silence. FML

#17526290
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33195) - you deserved it (4466)

On 08/20/2011 at 2:23am - misc - by W1D0 - United States (Illinois)

Today, after a tennis lesson, the coach was picking up the stray tennis balls around the court. Trying to be helpful, I asked him, "Do you want me to grab your ball bag?" His eyeballs almost burst out of their sockets. FML

#17512926
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26386) - you deserved it (7512)

On 08/18/2011 at 8:18pm - intimacy - by BigmouthStrikesAgain (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I walked outside my house to find my father in nothing but his underwear, spraying ants with ant-killer, laughing like a maniac and screaming, "Die bitches! Die!" FML

#17447180
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31711) - you deserved it (4272)

On 08/12/2011 at 2:17am - misc - by TuteSweet - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was preparing food in the microwave. I hadn't noticed that a fly had flown in until I noticed its melted corpse engraved into my hot-pocket. FML

#17429478
278 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28593) - you deserved it (5332)

On 08/10/2011 at 1:47pm - animals - by Ser17 - United States

Today, my mother and aunt got into an argument about who had gotten groped more times in public. I don't know what's more disturbing, that my own mother would brag about getting groped, or that she won the argument, at 34 times. FML

#17374758
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27375) - you deserved it (2250)

On 08/05/2011 at 3:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my old neighbor pelted me with apples when I walked out the door. I ducked for cover and asked what her problem was. She yelled, "You took fresh peas from my garden!" I looked at her garden, only to see my dad tiptoeing back to our lawn, laughing and holding a bag full of peas. FML

#17344218
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31447) - you deserved it (2869)

On 08/02/2011 at 2:36pm - misc - by scully11 (woman) - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, I found out that the crazy old man that sleep walks naked around my neighborhood every night is my grandpa. And he's not sleepwalking. FML

#17340162
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31270) - you deserved it (2452)

On 08/02/2011 at 2:46am - misc - by Username - United States

Today, in health class, I raised my hand and asked if you could get an STD from dogs. I have officially now ruined any extremely small chance I had of being popular. FML

#17304355
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9957) - you deserved it (71247)

On 07/30/2011 at 12:38am - animals - by loser4life - United States (Colorado)

Today, I found out that when you kick another man in the snowglobes and he smiles at you, there's something creepily wrong. FML

#17292941
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32378) - you deserved it (6551)

On 07/29/2011 at 12:20am - intimacy - by FML (man) - United States (Indiana)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

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