IHurtMyself

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IHurtMyself

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2793
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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IHurtMyself's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:36pm<b>LBOC</b> - the 02/17/2010 at 7:19pm<b>innnadaze</b> - the 05/28/2009 at 1:48pm<b>_Brookiie_13</b> - the 05/28/2009 at 3:21am<b>wideh2ogirl</b> - the 05/26/2009 at 7:41am<b>donnieandalicia</b> - the 05/26/2009 at 4:11am

IHurtMyself's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

IHurtMyself's favorite FMLs

Today, I was responsible for taking care of Hoppers, the rabbit belonging to my sons 3rd grade class. Tomorrow my son returns Hoppers so the next student can care for him. That won't be happening because Hoppers hopped out my 5th story window. FML

by Anonymous / 04/18/2009 at 5:12pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 1:13am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, while at the Golden Gate Bridge, I spotted a large group of Asians trying to take a picture. Trying to help, I slowly say, "You... want me... take picture?" while using hand motions. The man looks at me and says, "No thanks asshole, I got it," in plain English. FML

by Tourist / 03/26/2009 at 3:19am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

by RC3Welly / 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy