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Today, I was walking by a bunch of pretty girls. I'm not the most attractive boy, so I walked by nervously. I heard one yell "Hey cutie!" I turned to look, and they started laughing. She said "Oh my god, sorry! I assumed you were cute from your butt!" Apparently, my ass is nicer than my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50678) - you deserved it (2065)
On 06/14/2009 at 8:39pm - misc - by bitches. (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML
I agree, your life sucks (97074) - you deserved it (56273)
On 06/10/2009 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by badmom (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, while I was taking a break at work, someone stole my iPod from my desk. I work in a police station. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59770) - you deserved it (5843)
On 06/06/2009 at 7:18am - work - by foretwintie (man) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I went to the store to buy groceries. I didn't care how I looked, so I wore an old shirt that said, "Thousands of my potential children died on your daughter's face last night." I ran into my girlfriend's parents at the store. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33730) - you deserved it (109111)
On 05/24/2009 at 3:50pm - misc - by helloitsbrian6969 (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, my friend had to take my cat who has a tumor to be put down when I wasn't home since I couldn't bare to take him myself. I have two cats. He took the wrong one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (341960) - you deserved it (40704)
On 05/10/2009 at 3:01pm - animals - by catlady (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I had a massive argument with my boyfriend in which he called me stupid repeatedly. I stomped out of his house and sent a very angry text to my best friend about him. She didn't text back. Then my boyfriend texted. 'My girlfriend is so stupid she can't even text the right number.' FML
I agree, your life sucks (14060) - you deserved it (54966)
On 05/09/2009 at 11:48am - love - by rawkdinosawr (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I decided I would eat healthy in order to lose weight. Feeling powerful, I threw away all of the icecream in my freezer. An hour later, I picked the icecream carton out of the garbage and ate the entire half-melted carton. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16195) - you deserved it (84755)
On 05/09/2009 at 10:48am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I rolled down the windows in my car. When I tried to roll up the passenger side window, it was stuck. Rain was coming so I freaked out and brought it to the dealership to get it fixed. The man pushed the child safety lock button and the entire garage erupted in laughter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9754) - you deserved it (52389)
On 05/01/2009 at 2:42pm - misc - by KMilly (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I ran into my serious boyfriend of two years at a restaurant. He was sitting with another girl. I went over and asked him who she was. He replied, "Who are you?" Apparently I was the secret girlfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (61225) - you deserved it (3499)
On 05/01/2009 at 7:36am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)
Today, I came home from work and went to open the door. I Iooked in the window and saw a man in my house. Terrified, I called the police. They came, searched the house, and found nothing missing. I went back inside and looked through the window and saw him again. It was my reflection. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8764) - you deserved it (57239)
On 04/29/2009 at 7:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I went to a concert. They had this feature where you could send a picture of something from your cell phone and they'd put it on the big screens, so I sent a picture of myself in. When the picture came up on the screens, the entire crowd of about 4,000 people went, "Ewwww!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (62240) - you deserved it (20217)
On 04/26/2009 at 12:49pm - misc - by apparentlyugly (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I went to a concert. They had this feature where you could send a picture of something from your cell phone and they'd put it on the big screens, so I sent a picture of myself in. When the picture came up on the screens, the entire crowd of about 4,000 people went, "Ewwww!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (62240) - you deserved it (20217)
On 04/26/2009 at 12:49pm - misc - by apparentlyugly (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I got kicked in the face at a soccer game. Everybody clapped. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55730) - you deserved it (6894)
On 04/26/2009 at 11:14am - misc - by Tal (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I was meeting my girlfriend at the airport after studying abroad for a year. She ran to hug me, and I wanted to pick her up and spin her around, like they do in those romantic movies. I tried to do that, but instead I dropped her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14291) - you deserved it (38362)
On 04/23/2009 at 7:43pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I was talking to my hot neighbor. We were in the driveway of her house, and I looked at her car and noticed a hideous dummy. It was fat and just ugly, but I didn't think much of it. I tried to make a joke and asked, "Where did you get that awful thing?" She said, "That's my daughter". FML
I agree, your life sucks (7908) - you deserved it (67056)
On 04/22/2009 at 11:11pm - misc - by brob56 (man) - United States (Tennessee)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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