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Today, my uncle drove to my house in his tractor, beer in one hand, and a radio strapped to the dash blasting country music at unimaginable volume. Neither of us live on a farm. Half the neighborhood stood angrily glaring at us until we went inside. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21428) - you deserved it (2059)
On 05/24/2013 at 6:48pm - misc - by unwilling redneck - United States
Today, a package was delivered to my house, addressed to me, clearly marked "sexual health products". Inside were condoms, birth control pills, and an invoice made out to me. My parents went ballistic and grounded me. Whoever staged this "hilarious" prank: well played. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28525) - you deserved it (2040)
On 05/24/2013 at 5:43pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Iceland (Eyjafjardarsysla)
Today, after a sleepless night, I fell asleep at my work desk. When I awoke, I found my co-workers had duct taped me to my chair. I was yelling at them to untape me, when our boss came in, scolded me for fucking about on the job, and left without saying a word to my colleagues. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19955) - you deserved it (6580)
On 05/24/2013 at 12:08pm - work - by anthony512 (man) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)
Today, my friends and I were talking about the creepy stranger that used to stalk me back in high school. I guess his looks changed a lot through the years because I found out that he's my current boyfriend of 4 months. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37339) - you deserved it (10302)
On 05/24/2013 at 10:00am - love - by datgirl92 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was torn from my car and slammed against the hood because a canister of window-cleaning wipes I keep in my glove compartment apparently looks vaguely like a pipe-bomb. My lawyer agreed with the cops, and won't handle the "excessive force" case I threatened the police with. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29004) - you deserved it (2653)
On 05/24/2013 at 3:42am - misc - by JDziewaltowski (man) - United States
Today, my piano teacher complimented my song, calling it great. I was proud and thanked him, then realized he was being sarcastic. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24038) - you deserved it (2946)
On 05/24/2013 at 3:18am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I was using a restroom with automatic sinks and toilets. I assumed the paper towel dispensers were automatic too. I stood there waving my hands like an idiot before a girl walked in, pulled a lever, and made paper towels come out for me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13627) - you deserved it (25028)
On 05/23/2013 at 8:24pm - misc - by paper towel virgin - United States (Missouri)
Today, my aunt drove to my house and screamed at me for skateboarding in her driveway and denting her car. She then ransacked my room for said skateboard so she could break it in half. My aunt lives 4 hours away. I don't own a skateboard. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32173) - you deserved it (1482)
On 05/23/2013 at 7:25pm - misc - by Dalistair (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, the communications expert I'm forced to work with added the line "as they can catch bigger fishes" to a film script. She does not believe me when I tell her that the plural of fish is "fish." This idiot not only has the final word, she makes twice what I do. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24147) - you deserved it (2524)
On 05/23/2013 at 4:15pm - work - by onefishtwofishes (woman) - United States (District of Columbia)
Today, my girlfriend actually yelled, "Why are you making this all about YOU?!" after I confronted her over cheating on me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31659) - you deserved it (1771)
On 05/23/2013 at 12:40pm - love - by a single fuck (man) - Germany (Berlin)
Today, I got a call from work stating that my employment was being terminated. This was after being suspended while they investigated my sexual harassment claim. Their reason for firing me: misuse of company time. Yes, I suppose reporting being sexually harassed is a huge waste of time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35160) - you deserved it (3273)
On 05/23/2013 at 3:24am - work - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I finally scored a goal in a soccer game. Too bad it was in our own net. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21498) - you deserved it (26974)
On 05/23/2013 at 1:55am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was stuck in my apartment complex's elevator. I was shouting out for help when a voice came screaming, "This is the fire department." I was relieved until he said, "Just kidding." FML
I agree, your life sucks (35834) - you deserved it (2201)
On 05/23/2013 at 1:11am - misc - by Mylifesucks - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I have to defend my client in court. The defense that my client wants me to use is, "It's not a robbery if you have swag" and then goes on saying, "The judge is bound to let me go after he sees my swag." FML
I agree, your life sucks (41523) - you deserved it (3134)
On 05/22/2013 at 9:57pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I confronted my boss to find out why I was denied a promotion that she promised to me. Her response? "You should know by now I'm a liar. Not my fault if you believe the things I say." FML
I agree, your life sucks (27271) - you deserved it (2399)
On 05/22/2013 at 5:48pm - work - by Snurkles McGee (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Friday 24 May 2013
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