About HowAreYouToday : How are you today? Personally, I have seen better days... I came to Earth on the ship Degui MXXVIII, after my planet Vlou was destroyed by the invading Ortri soldiers. When I arrived in 1760, I was shocked at how primitive your species was, and set out on a quest to change that. Now, all these years later, you're living that story...
I never take things to heart
Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Today, my boyfriend went and bought Skyrim, Modern Warfare 3 and renewed his WoW subscription. Looks like I won't be getting laid for a month or two. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37061) - you deserved it (8625)
On 11/17/2011 at 3:22pm - intimacy - by anonymous - Canada (Alberta)
Today, like every day since my birth, my name is Spreme. Yeah, you probably have trouble pronouncing it correctly too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35603) - you deserved it (2799) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, I scored the winning goal in my soccer tournament. For the other team. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22820) - you deserved it (11476)
On 11/06/2011 at 1:14am - misc - by XxFA1LxX - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I was the 19th wheel at a party. Yes, I counted. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26272) - you deserved it (3210)
On 11/01/2011 at 1:01am - love - by Tom - United States
Today, I got a boner at the dentist. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27534) - you deserved it (6119)
On 10/27/2011 at 2:40am - intimacy - by Me - United States
Today, I went to the hospital with severe chest pain, thinking it was a heart attack. Turns out now I just can't have booze, pop, chocolate, fruit with skins, seeds, tomatoes, or mint. I'd rather have the heart attack. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20803) - you deserved it (2536)
On 10/23/2011 at 9:37pm - health - by heartsick (woman) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I went to the hospital with severe chest pain, thinking it was a heart attack. Turns out now I just can't have booze, pop, chocolate, fruit with skins, seeds, tomatoes, or mint. I'd rather have the heart attack. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20803) - you deserved it (2536)
On 10/23/2011 at 9:37pm - health - by heartsick (woman) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I could actually feel my toe hairs flapping in the breeze. I'm a girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19016) - you deserved it (13632)
On 10/07/2011 at 6:35am - misc - by Hairytoes - United States
Today, I showed my boyfriend a calendar, marked with the number of times we've had sex over the past month. Then followed by a calendar of the month before, which had almost triple the number of hits. I had to point out that our stats need to improve. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17962) - you deserved it (12154)
On 10/04/2011 at 3:04am - intimacy - by friskeyk14 - United States (California)
Today, I was at my job in the Halloween store. I had to tell someone, "Please stop hitting the Bieber wig with that pimp cane." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20751) - you deserved it (2760)
On 10/02/2011 at 1:15am - work - by katt_is_here (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, my school voted for a Pokémon theme for this year's homecoming. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28078) - you deserved it (11931)
On 09/18/2011 at 5:16pm - misc - by ohgodwhy - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, my school voted for a Pokémon theme for this year's homecoming. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28078) - you deserved it (11931)
On 09/18/2011 at 5:16pm - misc - by ohgodwhy - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, my girlfriend gave me a speech on me "not being manly enough". I started crying. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13957) - you deserved it (42167)
On 09/17/2011 at 4:17am - love - by Anonymous - South Africa (Gauteng)
Today, my wife told our six year old daughter that the devil beats his wife whenever there's a rainbow. Now she won't stop crying. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26803) - you deserved it (2671)
On 09/01/2011 at 2:02pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, while bitching some girl out for spilling coffee all over me, she looks at me with accepting eyes and says after I'd finished, "I can understand your anger, big girls like you get grumpy when they're hungry." FML
I agree, your life sucks (9727) - you deserved it (30562)
On 08/28/2011 at 5:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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