Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Holybatman

Offline (yesterday at 10:04pm) | Search for a member

Holybatman

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 20445
  • Number of comments : 54
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Holybatman's page activity

Visits<b>superwhovian</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 10:01pm<b>misjell94</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 7:08am<b>KrustyKrab</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 6:49am<b>arasx0</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 3:29pm<b>Tsula1994</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 5:33pm<b>oathkeeper99</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 9:09am<b>KatPlaysMC</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 7:15am<b>pubeboy</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 5:41pm<b>jordaandanielle</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 11:20pm<b>mwali02</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 3:18pm<b>jentrynicole</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 12:48pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 9:26am<b>stryggzy</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 7:06am<b>Atowns40</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 9:01am<b>Zenithbeauty</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 12:47am<b>hollandchris0822</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 2:35pm<b>zehtinyapple</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 1:42pm<b>netflixislove</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 9:11am

Fucked!<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 3:26pm<b>Zenithbeauty</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 6:47am

Holybatman's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Holybatman's badges

Holybatman's favorite FMLs

Today, as I was pressed for time, I opened some canned food for dinner. When my children were served, they said, "Mmm, this is best meal you've ever cooked for us!" I cook healthy, balanced meals every day. FML

#557
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21629) - you deserved it (7241)

On 12/20/2008 at 7:23am - kids - by Lola - Sent from mobile version

Today, I had sex with a girl who cried out as she came "Forgive me Lord! Forgive me Lord!" FML

#552
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53901) - you deserved it (6572)

On 12/19/2008 at 11:05am - intimacy - by chicochico - Sent from mobile version

Today, during dinner, my new girlfriend's father stroked my leg several times under the table with his bare foot. FML

#527
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33337) - you deserved it (2044)

On 12/16/2008 at 11:10pm - misc - by bloom - Sent from mobile version

Today, I needed to go to the toilet. Thinking that everyone had left work, I decided that, since I AM a Jedi, my penis ought to be my lightsaber. All of a sudden I hear a familiar voice: "At least someone is having fun!" It was my boss. FML

#523
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8474) - you deserved it (28951)

On 12/15/2008 at 10:58pm - work - by lopez - Sent from mobile version

Today, my Art Director once again turned down a demo model (for an advertisement) that I'd been working on for a week. This time he took his belt off and started thrashing the model to pieces. FML

#517
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23516) - you deserved it (1865)

On 12/14/2008 at 10:24pm - work - by Fuzy - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend told me in a very natural way that my mother is better at sex than me. FML

#452
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71770) - you deserved it (3966)

On 12/05/2008 at 3:12am - intimacy - by Mak1 - Belgium (Brabant)

Today, during a lunch I said "It must be awful to realize that you've been cheated on!". One of the men present had just found out that he had been. I then try to correct my tactlessness by saying "The worst must be when your wife leaves you for another woman". Which was also the case. FML

#399
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23946) - you deserved it (8921)

On 11/27/2008 at 7:34am - misc - by lovely-sweet - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was looking for a magazine in my mother's bedside cabinet and I came across some daft test about sex. Apparently, my mother likes anal, oral, and my dad's cock is bent. Nauseous. FML

#386
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39533) - you deserved it (9228)

On 11/25/2008 at 3:54am - intimacy - by mael - Sent from mobile version

Today, whilst chatting with my mum on MSN, she unintentionally sent me an animated emoticon of a penis jerking off repeatedly. I don't even want to know the type of conversation she was having. FML

#375
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36957) - you deserved it (2362)

On 11/23/2008 at 4:24am - intimacy - by Dina - Sent from mobile version

Today, I helped my son do his maths homework. He got a C and won’t talk to me anymore. FML

#298
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29749) - you deserved it (16638)

On 11/13/2008 at 6:39am - kids - by pinpin - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was writing to my girlfriend on msn when her roommate answered «Sorry, this is not Marie, she is at her boyfriend’s». Really? I've looked everywhere in my flat, I can’t find her. FML

#39
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72227) - you deserved it (3730)

On 10/25/2008 at 12:56pm - love - by Icy -

Today, I was lying on the bed with my boyfriend. We were watching his cell phone when an automatic reminder message came on the screen: "Do not forget to tell a lie to babe about going out this Friday". FML

#13
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (103740) - you deserved it (15137)

On 10/13/2008 at 4:23am - love - by Sarah91 -

Today, I woke up and switched on the TV. The first thing I saw was a picture of a wanted rapist, who looks just like me. I'm afraid to leave home. FML

#8
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (294067) - you deserved it (28389)

On 10/13/2008 at 4:20am - misc - by mehdi -

Today, in class, I was sitting next to the guy that I fancy. Shyly, I write our initials (L and A) into a heart on his hand to see his reaction. He said, "I love Los Angeles too!" FML

#6
444 comments

I agree, your life sucks (91177) - you deserved it (41471)

On 10/13/2008 at 4:19am - love - by mocass’1 (woman) - France



FML's blog

  • Elaillce's illustrated FML
  • So, did you catch the game this week? You know, the one with the ball, the scoring and all that stuff. Isn't that how you're supposed to talk to people? OK, I know nothing about sports and teams, but I…

Friday 17 April 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: