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Holybatman

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Holybatman

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 19371
  • Number of comments : 54
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Holybatman's favorite FMLs

Today, as I was pressed for time, I opened some canned food for dinner. When my children were served, they said, "Mmm, this is best meal you've ever cooked for us!" I cook healthy, balanced meals every day. FML

#557
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21597) - you deserved it (7233)

On 12/20/2008 at 7:23am - kids - by Lola - Sent from mobile version

Today, I had sex with a girl who cried out as she came "Forgive me Lord! Forgive me Lord!" FML

#552
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52067) - you deserved it (6321)

On 12/19/2008 at 11:05am - intimacy - by chicochico - Sent from mobile version

Today, during dinner, my new girlfriend's father stroked my leg several times under the table with his bare foot. FML

#527
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33306) - you deserved it (2040)

On 12/16/2008 at 11:10pm - misc - by bloom - Sent from mobile version

Today, I need to go to the toilet. Thinking that everyone has left work, I decide that, since I AM a jedi, my penis ought to be my Light saber. All of a sudden I hear a familiar voice: “At least someone is having fun!” It was my boss. FML

#523
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8469) - you deserved it (30883)

On 12/15/2008 at 10:58pm - work - by lopez - Sent from mobile version

Today, my Art Director once again turned down a demo model (for an advertisement) that I'd been working on for a week. This time he took his belt off and started thrashing the model to pieces. FML

#517
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23490) - you deserved it (1865)

On 12/14/2008 at 10:24pm - work - by Fuzy - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend told me in a very natural way that my mother is better at sex than me. FML

#452
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71732) - you deserved it (3964)

On 12/05/2008 at 3:12am - intimacy - by Mak1 - Belgium (Brabant)

Today, during a lunch I said "It must be awful to realize that you've been cheated on!". One of the men present had just found out that he had been. I then try to correct my tactlessness by saying "The worst must be when your wife leaves you for another woman". Which was also the case. FML

#399
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23926) - you deserved it (8916)

On 11/27/2008 at 7:34am - misc - by lovely-sweet - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was looking for a magazine in my mother's bedside cabinet and I came across some daft test about sex. Apparently, my mother likes anal, oral, and my dad's cock is bent. Nauseous. FML

#386
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39510) - you deserved it (9223)

On 11/25/2008 at 3:54am - intimacy - by mael - Sent from mobile version

Today, whilst chatting with my mum on MSN, she unintentionally sent me an animated emoticon of a penis jerking off repeatedly. I don't even want to know the type of conversation she was having. FML

#375
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36920) - you deserved it (2358)

On 11/23/2008 at 4:24am - intimacy - by Dina - Sent from mobile version

Today, I helped my son do his maths homework. He got a C and won’t talk to me anymore. FML

#298
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29717) - you deserved it (16627)

On 11/13/2008 at 6:39am - kids - by pinpin - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was writing to my girlfriend on msn when her roommate answered «Sorry, this is not Marie, she is at her boyfriend’s». Really? I've looked everywhere in my flat, I can’t find her. FML

#39
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69195) - you deserved it (3488)

On 10/25/2008 at 12:56pm - love - by Icy -

Today, I was lying on the bed with my boyfriend. We were watching his cell phone when an automatic reminder message came on the screen: "Do not forget to tell a lie to babe about going out this Friday". FML

#13
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (103627) - you deserved it (15133)

On 10/13/2008 at 4:23am - love - by Sarah91 -

Today, I woke up and switched on the TV. The first thing I saw was a picture of a wanted rapist, who looks just like me. I'm afraid to leave home. FML

#8
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (293287) - you deserved it (28372)

On 10/13/2008 at 4:20am - misc - by mehdi -

Today, in class, I was sitting next to the guy that I fancy. Shyly, I write our initials (L and A) into a heart on his hand to see his reaction. He said, "I love Los Angeles too!" FML

#6
443 comments

I agree, your life sucks (88751) - you deserved it (40439)

On 10/13/2008 at 4:19am - love - by mocass’1 (woman) - France



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