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Holybatman

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Holybatman

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 12933
  • Number of comments : 54
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Holybatman's page activity

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Holybatman's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

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Holybatman's favorite FMLs

Today, my brother's girlfriend dumped him. I overheard my mom tell him "It could be worse. Your brother can't even get a girlfriend". FML

#1919
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23655) - you deserved it (1644)

On 01/20/2009 at 3:41pm - love - by Taylor - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I found out my boyfriend's mom tried to bribe him with an iPhone to dump me. He accepted. FML

#1705
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29748) - you deserved it (1913)

On 01/19/2009 at 6:12am - love - by f'ed_over - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got an email notification from Yahoo! Personals: "Hi, we've found 0 new matches for you". FML

#1495
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19056) - you deserved it (2302)

On 01/17/2009 at 7:40pm - love - by sad sack. - United States (Florida)

Today, was just like almost every for the past few months; I slept till 1pm, smoked cigarettes, jerked off, went to the store to get coffee, smoked more cigarettes, and sat in my room alone until 4am, jerking off and smoking cigarettes. FML

#1487
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10254) - you deserved it (38345)

On 01/17/2009 at 6:35pm - misc - by none - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I went to the bagel shop down the street for breakfast, the same one I've been going to for over 6 months now. At the counter the same lil' cook guy who's served me over those same 6 months, looks at me and says, "Yes, Ms?". I'm a guy. FML

#1077
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16769) - you deserved it (2068)

On 01/14/2009 at 6:06am - misc - by dunnough - United States (New York)

Today, I went to the bagel shop down the street for breakfast, the same one I've been going to for over 6 months now. At the counter the same lil' cook guy who's served me over those same 6 months, looks at me and says, "Yes, Ms?". I'm a guy. FML

#1077
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16769) - you deserved it (2068)

On 01/14/2009 at 6:06am - misc - by dunnough - United States (New York)

Today, I saw a friend in the street but he didn't see me, so as a joke I decided to ring him. He took his mobile out of his pocket, sighed and didn't pick up. FML

#1016
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30511) - you deserved it (2755)

On 01/12/2009 at 9:47pm - misc - by patty - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend and I were looking for our bubblegum flavored "numbing" lotion to have some morning fun. We couldnt find it anywhere. After about 10 minutes, my little nephew comes from my room crying and drool coming out of his mouth. He smelt like bubblegum, his mouth and tongue were all numb. FML

#997
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29668) - you deserved it (7865)

On 01/12/2009 at 10:37am - intimacy - by LiLGeek - United States (California)

Today, I went into a shop, not really completely awake. To get to the upper floor, I took the escalator... in the wrong direction. After about 30 seconds (which seemed like hours) trying to climb up the wrong way, my brain started working and by that time I already had a few amused spectators watching me. FML

#722
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14598) - you deserved it (7911)

On 01/07/2009 at 12:53am - misc - by maaaryy - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was eating at a nice restaurant. Feeling curious, I daringly asked for the surprise "Maiden's Dream" dessert. The waiter came back with a banana between two balls of ice-cream on a plate, and no spoon. FML

#689
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19329) - you deserved it (6976)

On 01/03/2009 at 3:38am - misc - by sm@rtie - Sent from mobile version

Today, while kissing my girlfriend's neck, I sneezed a blob of snot onto her. She told me that "it doesn't matter", while hiccuping a bit of vomit. FML

#626
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20838) - you deserved it (5887)

On 12/29/2008 at 11:54pm - love - by sneezer - Sent from mobile version

Today, my fiancé told me, that after 7 years together, he is no longer in love with me. Shocked and appalled, I ask him if he has anything else to add. "Happy Birthday". FML

#608
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29335) - you deserved it (1593)

On 12/27/2008 at 5:26am - love - by Nalya - Sent from mobile version

Today, feeling romantic and overwhelmed with love, I told my fiancée: "I don't know what I'd do without you." She replied: "Well, you'd wank". FML

#591
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22449) - you deserved it (5381)

On 12/25/2008 at 1:07am - intimacy - by Nicos - Sent from mobile version

Today, as I was pressed for time, I opened some canned food for dinner. When my children were served, they said, "Mmm, this is best meal you've ever cooked for us!" I cook healthy, balanced meals every day. FML

#557
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20227) - you deserved it (6949)

On 12/20/2008 at 7:23am - kids - by Lola - Sent from mobile version

Today, I had sex with a girl who cried out as she came "Forgive me Lord! Forgive me Lord!" FML

#552
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50965) - you deserved it (6190)

On 12/19/2008 at 11:05am - intimacy - by chicochico - Sent from mobile version



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