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Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Today, at the elementary school where I teach, the kids all voted for their favorite teacher. I was the only one to receive zero votes. When I asked a small group of students why no one voted for me, one boy replied "because you're the ugliest". FML
I agree, your life sucks (39809) - you deserved it (2992)
Today, I fell asleep. I felt something on my face. I batted it away. It was my hamster. It died from a concussion upon hitting the wall. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28003) - you deserved it (10664)
On 02/04/2009 at 6:29pm - animals - by EpicFail (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I fell asleep. I felt something on my face. I batted it away. It was my hamster. It died from a concussion upon hitting the wall. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28003) - you deserved it (10664)
On 02/04/2009 at 6:29pm - animals - by EpicFail (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I told my girlfriend that I didn't feel wanted. Then she talked about how her cat puked on the carpet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20877) - you deserved it (2131)
On 02/04/2009 at 9:18am - love - by constantine (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, in biology class, I kept seeing a fly mosquito buzzing past my face and I kept trying to swat at it... only to realize that it was a ceiling sprinkler that was about 10 feet away. I have no depth perception. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9146) - you deserved it (10017)
On 02/04/2009 at 5:56am - animals - by Mith (man) - Poland (Wielkopolskie)
Today, I got up at 5am, brushed my teeth, shaved and showered to get ready for work only to step barefoot in a huge pile of dog crap in the middle of my living room floor. I don't own a dog. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31759) - you deserved it (1360)
On 02/04/2009 at 2:53am - animals - by RustyBulletHole - United States (Illinois)
Today, my friend's son asked me how much coke costs in this place. I told him "about a dollar?" He said "wow, that's really cheap for blow." He's 10. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26928) - you deserved it (1896)
On 02/03/2009 at 6:55pm - kids - by Morgan (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, my girlfriend asked if her friend Alex from high school could join in with us and we could have an amazing threesome. As a horny dude how could I say no? Turns out Alex is also a guys name. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11659) - you deserved it (49452)
On 02/02/2009 at 11:29am - intimacy - by Randy Savage (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my boyfriend called me by his mother's name for the 100th time. I'm a guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26282) - you deserved it (6975)
On 02/01/2009 at 2:01pm - love - by someonevexed - Germany (Baden-Wurttemberg)
Today, my boyfriend called me by his mother's name for the 100th time. I'm a guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26282) - you deserved it (6975)
On 02/01/2009 at 2:01pm - love - by someonevexed - Germany (Baden-Wurttemberg)
Today, I was waiting after work in a parking lot for my ride and was dancing a little to keep warm. Next thing I know the cops pull up to me and said that someone called in to report someone dancing in an empty parking lot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18139) - you deserved it (1892)
On 01/31/2009 at 7:01pm - misc - by HumanNature - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend and accidentally called her Brad (one of my roomates name) when I came. Now her and her friends think i'm gay and my roomate Brad moved out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32009) - you deserved it (25987)
On 01/29/2009 at 4:44pm - intimacy - by GavinHosler - United States (Michigan)
Today, I marked the 6th anniversary of the last time I had intercourse. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27696) - you deserved it (3627)
On 01/28/2009 at 3:18pm - misc - by Noname - United States (California)
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend and as I pulled out to finish I slipped and ended up punching her in the stomach, I came while she was writhing in pain. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25996) - you deserved it (8435)
On 01/27/2009 at 5:26pm - intimacy - by ottawaaa - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I picked up my cat and it went wild because I didn't know he was sleeping. I ended with with several cuts, and one on my wrist. Later a kid in my high school saw my wrist and told my guidance counselor who told my parents. Now everyone thinks I'm either a liar, attention whore, or emo. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17802) - you deserved it (1590)
On 01/27/2009 at 12:44pm - animals - by Anizzaf - United States (Massachusetts)
Monday 20 May 2013
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