This member hasn't filled in their description.
Holybatman's FML badges
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
I like your style
You've liked someone. How cute!
Holybatman's favorite FMLs
by cupcake_butt / 10/17/2011 at 4:39am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Unemployed / 10/16/2011 at 3:15am / United States (Oregon) / Work
Today, I awoke to rose petals leading me to the front garden. Curious, I followed them, thinking my boyfriend planned something romantic. As I walked out the door, I was hit in the face with a paper plate full of whipped cream and sprinkles, and then locked outside. FML
by Eet- / 10/13/2011 at 3:20pm / United Kingdom (Dorset) / Love
by Anonymous / 10/13/2011 at 12:56pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, during my first date with a girl I've liked for awhile, she tells me about some minor disabilities she was born with. Wanting to be honest with her too, I tell her I'm slightly autistic. Her response was, "I'm sorry this isn't going to work. I can't date a retard." I had to eat alone after that. FML
by DyingPlants / 10/09/2011 at 11:27pm / United States (Missouri) / Love
Today, I was talking with my uncle, when the subject of my abusive mother-in-law came up. He assured me he'd talk to her and straighten things out. Apparently this means posting on her Facebook wall threatening to "pimp-slap a bitch" if she doesn't get her "fat ass out of family business". FML
by ...... / 10/07/2011 at 10:40pm / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous
by soapy / 10/01/2011 at 12:08pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/22/2011 at 1:20am / United States (Florida) / Work
by Anonymous / 09/19/2011 at 4:27pm / United States / Love
by Nicole / 09/19/2011 at 4:16pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I had my parents over at my new apartment. As I was telling them how quiet and peaceful my new place is, we could hear my neighbors talking nasty to each other before launching into a full-blown sex ordeal. FML
by holler / 09/15/2011 at 12:22am / Japan (Tokyo) / Intimacy
Today, I watched a cat pounce on a small bird and rip it to shreds, feather by feather. It wouldn't have been any worse than mildly disturbing, had I not just spent the last 4 weeks nursing the bird back to health from a broken wing. FML
by Twitchy / 09/14/2011 at 7:20pm / Bahamas (New Providence) / Animals
Today, I finished the first month of a diet and exercise program designed to help me lose weight. To keep myself motivated, I have avoided the scale the entire time. I weighed myself today. I've gained 6 pounds. FML
by Anonymous / 09/14/2011 at 2:21pm / United States (South Carolina) / Health
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, I was eating my lunch. When I opened my mouth to eat a spoonful of rice, a bee flew right…