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Holybatman

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Holybatman

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 20375
  • Number of comments : 54
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Holybatman's page activity

Visits<b>misjell94</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 7:08am<b>KrustyKrab</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 6:49am<b>arasx0</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 3:29pm<b>Tsula1994</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 5:33pm<b>oathkeeper99</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 9:09am<b>KatPlaysMC</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 7:15am<b>pubeboy</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 5:41pm<b>jordaandanielle</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 11:20pm<b>mwali02</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 3:18pm<b>jentrynicole</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 12:48pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 9:26am<b>stryggzy</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 7:06am<b>Atowns40</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 9:01am<b>Zenithbeauty</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 12:47am<b>hollandchris0822</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 2:35pm<b>zehtinyapple</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 1:42pm<b>netflixislove</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 9:11am<b>catherine012</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 10:05am

Fucked!<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 3:26pm<b>Zenithbeauty</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 6:47am

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Holybatman's favorite FMLs

Today, at a big family dinner, my dad said, "Pfff, gays don't have it hard at all. The things a guy has to do for sex with a girl? Crazy. All a gay guy has to do for sex is become an altar boy!" My husband's side of the family is very religious, and all hell quickly broke loose. FML

#21369938
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32581) - you deserved it (3037)

On 03/07/2015 at 1:42pm - misc - by killme (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I witnessed my very overweight cat trying to jump over my fence, only to shit himself half way up, and then land in it. FML

Today, I got on one knee in front of my girlfriend. I pulled out the ring, uttered the words "Lisa, will you..." then abruptly shat my pants. FML

#21271177
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42746) - you deserved it (5154)

On 10/05/2014 at 11:47am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk, except it wasn't really a talk, but rather him making me watch a hardcore porn video with him as he commented on what the actors were doing. I had to listen to all this and ignore his obvious erection for almost an hour. FML

#20660939
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79782) - you deserved it (5502)

On 05/13/2013 at 3:10pm - intimacy - by more than I wanted to know (man) - Italy (Emilia-Romagna)

Today, I came home in a really good mood, and I greeted my husband with a grin and a "Hi, babe!" He just muttered, "Why can't you just DIE?" and continued playing his video game. FML

#20490556
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38435) - you deserved it (4968)

On 02/02/2013 at 5:34pm - love - by rani (woman) - Norway (Oslo)

Today, I found out that the tinsel on my Christmas tree is worth a couple of hundred euros per strand. Well, that's how much the two that were surgically removed from my cat have cost me. At least the cat's going to be fine. FML

#20410843
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18805) - you deserved it (12610)

On 12/21/2012 at 5:02am - animals - by I Like My Cat (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, I had to explain to my fiancé that having me watch him jerk off over a porno is not in fact considered foreplay. FML

#20409320
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41241) - you deserved it (11120)

On 12/20/2012 at 5:45pm - intimacy - by alicia (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my boyfriend told me his Christmas gift to me was custom made. I told my parents in excitement, thinking it could possibly be a ring. Half an hour later he told me what it was; a molded dildo of his penis. It's going to be an awkward conversation with my parents when they ask what I got. FML

#20408274
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39808) - you deserved it (14282)

On 12/20/2012 at 12:30am - intimacy - by djl (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my car window got smashed in. The cop that came to take the report said they'd already caught the guy doing it, he'd smashed in several other car windows, all of the exact same model and color. His reason for doing it was simple: he was drunk and "hated red Jeeps". FML

#20403025
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31015) - you deserved it (3350)

On 12/17/2012 at 12:08am - misc - by Cold (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, during a conversation, my boss said, "What, what?" Before I could stop myself, I replied, "In the butt." FML

#20191552
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12033) - you deserved it (28269)

On 12/04/2012 at 9:43pm - work - by whitecollar - United Kingdom (York)

Today, an hour after having been turned down for sex, I walked in on my wife fingering herself to a copy of War and Peace. FML

#20178424
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34186) - you deserved it (4106)

On 11/25/2012 at 4:34pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands (Noord-Brabant)

Today, dressed in my sexiest nightie, I asked my boyfriend in the most sensual voice possible what he'd like me do to for him tonight. His eyed widened, he started clapping wildly and then shrieked, "SPAGHETTI CARBONARA!" FML

#20142866
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24304) - you deserved it (4313) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 11/01/2012 at 7:48am - love - by Anonymous - France (Picardie)

Today, I passed out while I was with my boyfriend in his garden. I woke up on the concrete just outside his house. Apparently, he'd tried to carry me in, but because he was too weak, he gave up and went to watch TV. FML

#20131269
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24562) - you deserved it (3220)

On 10/24/2012 at 12:52pm - love - by Alice - United Kingdom

Today, I tried role playing with my boyfriend. As I came out in sexy lingerie, I announced, "I'm Natalia, a Russian spy fluent in 2 languages: Russian and your cock." He laughed so hard he practically pissed himself. The night ended in me doing his laundry. Alone. FML

#20119371
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32062) - you deserved it (18507)

On 10/16/2012 at 8:36am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I got a call from my son's school saying to pick him up because he'd shat his pants. He's in high school. FML

#20119263
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26084) - you deserved it (2627)

On 10/16/2012 at 4:07am - kids - by Mike - United States



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