About Hikarishimizu : I'm 14. Life sucks at this age. :/
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That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
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Today, my identical twin sister's boyfriend walked over to me, and whispered in my ear, "I know what you look like naked." FML
I agree, your life sucks (34102) - you deserved it (2875)
On 06/12/2012 at 2:28pm - misc - by creeped out - United States (New York)
Today, I asked my girlfriend why she never lets me in her house. She stared blankly and said, "What is inside is not for thine eyes." I told her best friend about this creepiness later on. She sighed and said, "T'was not for mine eyes either. I didst fail to listen." I feel like I'm losing my mind here. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18757) - you deserved it (2420)
On 06/11/2012 at 5:45pm - love - by amidreaming?? (man) - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, I was trying to take my shirt off. It was an awkward fit, so I had to basically wrestle it for five minutes. The kicker was that I was giving my boyfriend a striptease. He laughed so hard and for so long that we never had sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16404) - you deserved it (5005)
On 06/05/2012 at 3:36pm - intimacy - by Damn (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I arranged a romantic dinner for my boyfriend. His favourite meal, fresh flowers, scented candles. Everything went beautifully, at least until he wrapped an arm around me and whispered, "Want some dick?" into my ear. Mood horrifically ruined. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21665) - you deserved it (4680)
On 06/01/2012 at 7:50pm - intimacy - by dating a manchild (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)
Today, I met up with my dad after having worked abroad for the past six months. Apparently, during that time he's had a mid-life crisis or been snorting a few too many turds, because he's now some sort of hippie calling himself "Memnoch of Pleiades". FML
I agree, your life sucks (13942) - you deserved it (1444)
On 05/30/2012 at 5:34pm - misc - by wtf (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)
Today, my boyfriend and I were acting out a kinky scenario at home, where we'd met in a club and were having a one night stand. We ended up getting into a real argument about an imaginary girl in the club. I didn't have sex and we haven't spoken since. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7850) - you deserved it (20596)
On 05/27/2012 at 10:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I got yelled at and called a pedo by a mother after I sat down in a swing next to her daughter. I was too embarrassed to tell her that I'm a 20 year old who really does enjoy swinging in my spare time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17586) - you deserved it (2863)
On 05/27/2012 at 9:13am - misc - by CA19oo - United States (Georgia)
Today, I was watching a boys volleyball team warming up, and I had my eye on one of them who was quite attractive. He sent the ball a little too far and it hit me in the face. He apologized, and I then for some reason replied with, "It's fine, I like balls in my face." FML
I agree, your life sucks (14172) - you deserved it (24753)
On 04/15/2012 at 9:13pm - intimacy - by lifeonfire12 (woman) - Canada
Today, my girlfriend of 2 years texted me saying "I can't wait to f*ck later." I replied saying, "Couldn't we just spend time together?" Her response was, "What are you, a girl?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (13285) - you deserved it (34135)
On 04/12/2012 at 12:06am - intimacy - by girly (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was eating a banana, and decided to practice my blowjob skills, since my boyfriend is always complaining that I'm bad at giving head. Let's just say my lungs now have their daily dose of potassium. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6748) - you deserved it (21852)
On 04/11/2012 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by potassiumgirl - United States (Florida)
Today, I was eating a banana, and decided to practice my blowjob skills, since my boyfriend is always complaining that I'm bad at giving head. Let's just say my lungs now have their daily dose of potassium. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6748) - you deserved it (21852)
On 04/11/2012 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by potassiumgirl - United States (Florida)
Today, I was eating a banana, and decided to practice my blowjob skills, since my boyfriend is always complaining that I'm bad at giving head. Let's just say my lungs now have their daily dose of potassium. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6748) - you deserved it (21852)
On 04/11/2012 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by potassiumgirl - United States (Florida)
Today, I was eating a banana, and decided to practice my blowjob skills, since my boyfriend is always complaining that I'm bad at giving head. Let's just say my lungs now have their daily dose of potassium. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6748) - you deserved it (21852)
On 04/11/2012 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by potassiumgirl - United States (Florida)
Today, I was eating a banana, and decided to practice my blowjob skills, since my boyfriend is always complaining that I'm bad at giving head. Let's just say my lungs now have their daily dose of potassium. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6748) - you deserved it (21852)
On 04/11/2012 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by potassiumgirl - United States (Florida)
Today, I found out that my boyfriend is afraid of female orgasms. Right as I was about to climax, he panicked, pulled out, and ran into the bathroom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28293) - you deserved it (2015)
On 04/05/2012 at 2:47am - intimacy - by displeased - United States (North Carolina)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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