Just a simple man who hates his life
Today, my boss walked in my office to see me busy making a little Post-it dress for my pen. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7112) - you totally deserved it (32690)
On 07/09/2009 at 12:27pm - misc - by Anonymous - France (Midi-Pyrenees)
Today, I noticed a string was following behind our family cat. After close inspection I realized it was a plastic kite string he partially digested. I had to pull the other three feet of plastic kite tail from his rectum. He purred the entire time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39490) - you totally deserved it (2079)
On 07/03/2009 at 3:06pm - misc - by RachelDC (woman) - United States (West Virginia)
Today my friend told me that he was having a scrabble tournament at his house with a bunch of our friends. I told my dad about the tournament and he gave me a special scrabble dictionary to bring. Hesitantly I brought the dictionary and as I walked in everyone was playing beer pong. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24547) - you totally deserved it (7473)
On 06/17/2009 at 1:15pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I bought a brand new flat screen TV. When I brought it home it didn't work. Furious, I walked into Best Buy and yelled at a guy in a tucked in blue polo and khakis. I asked him why it didn't work and he said he didn't know. I kept screaming. He didn't have a nametag. He didn't work there. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6289) - you totally deserved it (70688)
On 04/18/2009 at 10:44pm - misc - by asdfghjkl (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML
I agree, your life sucks (107333) - you totally deserved it (27597)
On 04/02/2009 at 1:13am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was jogging through my neighborhood and then I notice this cute guy running beside me, we stoped and flirted for a while and my mom drove past. She then rolled down the window and said "Honey, you owe me for the dry cleaning on your period pants." FML
I agree, your life sucks (65759) - you totally deserved it (2273)
On 03/28/2009 at 12:50pm - misc - by Lolrus - Qatar (Ad Dawhah)
Today, I decided to ask my girlfriend of 3 years to marry me. I made brownies with walnuts and put an engagement ring into the brownie I gave her. Not only did she choke on the ring, but on the way to the emergency room, I find out she is highly allergic to walnuts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21530) - you totally deserved it (53044)
On 03/27/2009 at 9:10pm - love - by Jim (man) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I was a TA for a history class and the class was taking a test. About halfway through, I noticed one kid had a small piece of paper in his hand. I ran up the row, grabbed his test, and ripped it into four pieces. Then I took the note from him. It said "I believe in you, -Mom." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20577) - you totally deserved it (137062)
On 02/26/2009 at 10:30am - misc - by Noname - United States (Michigan)
Today, I decided to send my boyfriend a pic text of me naked. I accidently sent it to my dad and got a text back saying "You definitely take after your mom". FML
I agree, your life sucks (23773) - you totally deserved it (39806)
On 02/05/2009 at 9:09am - intimacy - by ruffrider (woman) - United States (South Carolina)
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