Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

HeretoBlame

Search for a member

HeretoBlame

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 20 January 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1469
  • Number of comments : 123
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About HeretoBlame : yawn...

HeretoBlame's page activity

Visits<b>cupcake1128</b> - the 06/27/2013 at 9:18am<b>iEatGlass</b> - the 04/03/2013 at 3:19pm<b>Gunnie</b> - the 01/22/2013 at 8:09am<b>El_Mojiiito</b> - the 09/29/2012 at 1:49pm<b>Trollx</b> - the 07/01/2012 at 6:05pm<b>cestplat</b> - the 06/30/2012 at 3:27am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:57pm<b>Abnuf</b> - the 03/09/2011 at 8:07am<b>valri3</b> - the 02/23/2011 at 7:54am<b>fluffingclouds</b> - the 02/15/2011 at 11:27am<b>anonymous1132</b> - the 12/29/2010 at 2:19am<b>Bored_ToDeath</b> - the 12/24/2010 at 7:51am<b>lilauer13</b> - the 12/20/2010 at 10:24am<b>anquilla</b> - the 12/02/2010 at 5:42am<b>Aniblecoby</b> - the 12/01/2010 at 12:05am<b>Tikwichka</b> - the 11/30/2010 at 2:57pm<b>heymickey123</b> - the 11/23/2010 at 12:12am<b>candy29</b> - the 11/20/2010 at 5:03pm

HeretoBlame's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

HeretoBlame's favorite FMLs

Today, I dreamed that I was making out with a cute girl. Just as I was about to take it to the next level, she suddenly burst into tears and said, "I'm sorry, I can't do this." I can't even get laid in my dreams. FML

#16609106
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54286) - you deserved it (6838)

On 06/11/2011 at 10:24am - intimacy - by Ryan - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, after spending thousands of dollars and several years pursuing a higher education so I could get a high paying job doing something that requires skill and brainpower, I finally got my first job offer after months of searching. I will be cleaning houses. FML

#16546066
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35194) - you deserved it (5269)

On 06/07/2011 at 1:05pm - work - by disappointed (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I was walking down the street and I saw an old man, and me feeling nice I asked him if I could help him cross the street. He responded with: "Only if you let me touch your tits." FML

#14549895
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30588) - you deserved it (5997)

On 01/12/2011 at 12:31am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. He decided to make gun sound effects as he came. FML

#14518129
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25992) - you deserved it (5179)

On 01/09/2011 at 5:18am - intimacy - by S - Singapore

Today, I found out that my wife was having sex with my friend. It turned out that my genius cat realized it wasn't me there and attacked his balls, severely cutting them. I now have to kill my cat and pay for his medical bills to sew his balls back. FML

#14512160
458 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68420) - you deserved it (3647)

On 01/08/2011 at 8:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, while at my mom's birthday dinner, I started to pretend to drum with one hand, using my left leg as the drums. Everybody stared at me and started to yell. Now they all think I was masturbating. FML

#14090215
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22058) - you deserved it (10319)

On 12/05/2010 at 12:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, while at my mom's birthday dinner, I started to pretend to drum with one hand, using my left leg as the drums. Everybody stared at me and started to yell. Now they all think I was masturbating. FML

#14090215
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22058) - you deserved it (10319)

On 12/05/2010 at 12:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend confessed his desire to have sex while I'm on my period. He calls it "bloody victory." FML

#14087170
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35431) - you deserved it (5270)

On 12/04/2010 at 7:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, someone whistled, so I turned around. The guy behind me then said: "Did you seriously think that it was meant for you?" FML

#13017861
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33964) - you deserved it (4430)

On 09/12/2010 at 10:04am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I went to a zoo that had a gorilla in a cage. I walked up, and the gorilla stopped what he was doing, looked me in the eyes, and started jacking off. FML

#13005397
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37890) - you deserved it (9628)

On 09/11/2010 at 3:25pm - intimacy - by gorillalove - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to a zoo that had a gorilla in a cage. I walked up, and the gorilla stopped what he was doing, looked me in the eyes, and started jacking off. FML

#13005397
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37890) - you deserved it (9628)

On 09/11/2010 at 3:25pm - intimacy - by gorillalove - United States (Texas)

Today, my family and I argued whether getting a period or boner in the middle of class was worse. At the dinner table. FML

#12986098
382 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26880) - you deserved it (12163)

On 09/10/2010 at 1:30am - intimacy - by Me - United States (Washington)

Today, I went with my family to go see a notoriously creepy abandoned house. We noticed the people had left a lot of stuff behind so we loaded up the car with books, records, etc. As we were leaving, we saw the family who lived there drive up. I robbed a house with my grandma. FML

#12826740
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9937) - you deserved it (43812)

On 08/30/2010 at 8:04pm - misc - by tikizombie (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was moving out of my old place. While walking around to make sure I would get my damage deposit back, I stepped on my roommate's lipstick and smeared it all over the white carpet. Then, I tripped on the phone cord and ripped the whole thing out of the wall. FML

#12823670
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29343) - you deserved it (7400)

On 08/30/2010 at 4:10pm - misc - by tikizombie (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was moving out of my old place. While walking around to make sure I would get my damage deposit back, I stepped on my roommate's lipstick and smeared it all over the white carpet. Then, I tripped on the phone cord and ripped the whole thing out of the wall. FML

#12823670
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29343) - you deserved it (7400)

On 08/30/2010 at 4:10pm - misc - by tikizombie (man) - Canada (Alberta)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: