About HazelXHeart : Hey there :) Vegan pizza is AWESOME!!!
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HazelXHeart's favorite FMLs
by Unemployed / 10/16/2011 at 3:15am / United States (Oregon) / Work
Today, I was watching my cousin shoot at targets on hay bales with his plastic pellet BB gun. After my sister asked him if it would hurt to be shot with one, my cousin smiled at her and said, "Ask your sister" as he shot me in the leg. I think my screaming was obvious enough. It hurts. FML
by ThanksChris / 10/16/2011 at 3:06am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/16/2011 at 12:22am / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, while jogging in the park, I saw a man acting strange and trying to talk to 3 little girls. I jogged over to their mother and warned her about a 'weirdo' lurking around her daughters. Turns out that 'weirdo' is the woman's disabled brother. FML
by cristina_laila / 10/15/2011 at 9:13pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, my mom left for a business trip. Thinking it was a good time to throw a party, I mass messaged everyone on my contact list. I thought it was going to be a success. The problem with this? My mom is on my contacts list. She replied "I'll be home in an hour. You're grounded." FML
by mass message / 10/15/2011 at 8:47pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was kicked out of the mall along with a bunch of my friends, sworn at by the security guards, and personally escorted all the way to the sidewalk, only to find out we'd been mistaken for another group of people. FML
by -- / 10/15/2011 at 7:40pm / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous
by myfamilyisodd / 10/15/2011 at 1:05pm / United States (North Carolina) / Kids
by Anonymous / 10/15/2011 at 1:05pm / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, I went to visit my grandpa. He has an easily excited dog, who barreled into my freshly broken knee. I felt my knee move out of place again. The dog chipped a tooth. We went to the vet first. FML
by KilteDKilleR / 10/15/2011 at 10:02am / United States (Utah) / Health
by Ca13b / 10/15/2011 at 3:18am / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous
Today, I saw an unbelievably cute guy. He caught my eye and began to walk towards me. I adjusted myself and flashed him a smile. He came up to me, smiled back, and said "Hi, do you have a minute for gay rights?" FML
by Anonymous / 10/15/2011 at 2:58am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went shopping with my mom. I went into my department and tried on some clothes. After a few minutes, there is an announcement that a child has gone missing. Staff are searching the store. I see my mom and she hugs me in tears and yells, "I found her!" I'm almost 17. FML
by Ania / 10/15/2011 at 1:13am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
by dak-rod423 / 10/15/2011 at 12:33am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I made a half-hour bike ride to the movie store, only to realize I'd forgotten my money. I made the ride back home, grabbed my money, went back to the store, paid, then made a second ride home. I got home exhausted, and opened the case. They gave me the wrong movie. FML
by CPD / 10/15/2011 at 12:12am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I came home from school to find almost every single personal possession and piece of furniture from my bedroom all laid out or disassembled in the back yard. My dad smugly told me I'd better start moving it all back. This is his revenge for me salting his coffee this morning. FML
by Anonymous / 10/14/2011 at 9:48pm / Canada / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 3Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his…