About HazelXHeart : Hey there :) Vegan pizza is AWESOME!!!
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HazelXHeart's favorite FMLs
Today, I was over at a friend's house for a party. I was trying to strike up a conversation with one of my cute guy friends, so I showed him this funny picture of me that my friend took. His reply was "Hahahaa those Fatbooth pictures are hilarious!" It wasn't a Fatbooth picture. FML
by sophhiee / 11/05/2011 at 7:45am / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous
Today, my girlfriend sent me a sexy picture of herself in my boxers. I thought it would be funny to take a picture of myself in the thong she left in my room and send it to her. She thought it would be funnier on Facebook. FML
by kdeeeceee / 11/05/2011 at 3:25am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, on the subway, a woman got off without her suitcase. I grabbed the case, chased her onto the platform, and shouted, "You forgot your suitcase!" while the doors closed behind me. In actual fact, it wasn't her suitcase, and its actual owner was still on the train. FML
by Lavalise / 11/05/2011 at 3:11am / France / Transportation
Today, I was dared to walk home through a rough part of town. My rep hung in the balance, so I accepted. A kid kicked a football in my direction, so I kicked it back at him hard. It hit him in the nuts, and the next thing I know, I'm running for my life from three bald, shirtless, six-packed thugs. FML
by Anonymous / 11/04/2011 at 9:21pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 11/04/2011 at 3:38pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by foreverashamed / 11/04/2011 at 2:57am / Canada / Love
by me / 11/04/2011 at 12:38am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by oneillrox / 11/03/2011 at 4:06pm / United States (New Jersey) / Money
by peonypiney / 11/03/2011 at 3:32pm / United States (Florida) / Kids
by Anonymous / 11/02/2011 at 4:18pm / United States / Kids
Today, I overheard my dad telling his work buddy that he's disappointed in his kid. I assumed he meant my brother, for flunking out of school. He meant me, for quitting sports to focus on my studies. FML
by Anonymous / 11/02/2011 at 10:43am / United States (Minnesota) / Kids
Today, my boyfriend confessed that he hates horror films. Our relationship was born out of our 'love' for horror films. I have endured 3 years of watching films that absolutely terrify me only to find out he doesn't like them either. FML
by duped / 10/29/2011 at 7:32am / United Kingdom (Warwickshire) / Love
Today, I finally found out where my great grandmother's antique handheld mirror disappeared to. According to the headmaster, my eleven year old son has been using it to look up his classmates' dresses at school. FML
by Anonymous / 10/28/2011 at 8:25am / United States / Kids
by Anonymous / 10/27/2011 at 11:48pm / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous
Today, I had to sit patiently at the checkout at work, listening to my own father rant about how the twinkies he was buying were "twice the size back in my day", and how "you could buy a dozen of these suckers for just 10 cents." He didn't stop there. No, he tried to haggle over the price. FML
by Angelica / 10/27/2011 at 9:48pm / United States (New York) / Work
- 1Today, my religious dad caught my brother jerking off and decided to give us both a lecture about… 2Today, I discovered, after years of being grounded for losing my belongings, that I didn't actually… 3Today, eight tornados hit the town where I live. The only person who tried to get a hold of me and…