Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Hazardsoflove

Offline (the 06/01/2015 at 3:28am) | Search for a member

Hazardsoflove

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 22 February 1996 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1373
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Hazardsoflove : Just a kid on a midnight adventure.

Hazardsoflove's page activity

Visits<b>Monday_funday</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 4:14pm

Hazardsoflove's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

See all of Hazardsoflove's badges

Hazardsoflove's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at the doctors office after throwing up for the past week. My diagnosis? Apparently I'm the first pregnant man. After several minutes of me freaking out and him explaining how it was possible, he told me he was joking and that I'm fine, but my reaction was the best thus far. FML

#13787466
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48863) - you deserved it (17807)

On 11/10/2010 at 5:28am - health - by youreajoker (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I asked my boyfriend what he would do if I were to get pregnant. Expecting him to give me a cute and supportive answer, he replied, "We'd be finding you a nice flight of stairs to accidentally fall down." FML

#13031931
298 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40147) - you deserved it (12855)

On 09/13/2010 at 5:14am - love - by vikinggirl (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, after going down on my boyfriend, we were cuddling and I went to kiss him. Just before I could reach his lips, he ran his finger over my mouth and whispered, "S-s-s-semen." FML

#11542106
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31195) - you deserved it (24856)

On 06/29/2010 at 1:34pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, in math class, I had the urge to fart. I had the bright idea that if I dropped my textbook and farted at the same time, nobody would hear it. I dropped my textbook, everyone looked at me, then I farted. Loudly. FML

#11389778
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19092) - you deserved it (58936)

On 06/22/2010 at 9:41pm - health - by fartwoman - United States (California)

Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. While I was asleep, he drew a face on my stomach and when I woke up he was talking to it. He said it would be less weird if he was talking to my stomach with a face on it, representing the baby. According to him, our child is going to have a mustache. FML

#11198427
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20707) - you deserved it (26994)

On 06/14/2010 at 7:13pm - kids - by gibsonSG323 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job, which was great, until she started saying "milk the penis... miiiiilk the penis." FML

#10667407
311 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49263) - you deserved it (14332)

On 05/21/2010 at 11:46am - intimacy - by mperrotta913 (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, fifteen minutes after dinner was served, my blind date says "It's good that you're smart. Not to be rude, but most girls aren't. I mean, at some point, I'm going to pull my dick out of your mouth and then it's good if you have something interesting to say." Check please. FML

#9643258
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44421) - you deserved it (7899)

On 04/05/2010 at 1:14am - intimacy - by Hate2Date (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, while making out with my boyfriend, he started playing with my nipples. Suddenly he stops kissing me, looks at my nipples and says, "Have they always been like this? They look like joysticks!". He then started singing the Super Mario Brother's theme song and playing the game with my nipples. FML

#9086835
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26901) - you deserved it (5165)

On 03/14/2010 at 10:09pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. As I was beginning to enjoy and really get into it, I heard him say, "Oh my god, this is good shit." I looked up sexily, only to find that he was eating a Twinkie. FML

#7339757
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30549) - you deserved it (5322)

On 01/14/2010 at 3:36pm - intimacy - by scubai (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my mom put some bubblewrap on my desk because she thought I would have fun with it. I'm 18. It was awesome. FML

#3229865
298 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71614) - you deserved it (41901)

On 06/26/2009 at 2:13am - misc - by Jeweler (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that the girl I've been dating online for over three months is actually a very bored 14-year-old boy. FML

#1617373
514 comments

I agree, your life sucks (109403) - you deserved it (282618)

On 05/04/2009 at 2:12am - love - by Iman (man) - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: