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HawnSun

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HawnSun

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  • Number of visits : 146
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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HawnSun's favorite FMLs

Today, I was helping clean my grandpa's garage when I found some of his old election posters from the '50s. They included slogans such as, "Dick: you know it feels right" and "Want growth? Choose Dick." I'm not sure whether to be disgusted or impressed. FML

#17279382
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26016) - you deserved it (4139)

On 07/27/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Nick (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I woke up to a mosquito feeding on my morning wood; probably the only thing that will ever suck my penis. FML

#16277810
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59080) - you deserved it (10069)

On 05/21/2011 at 5:07am - intimacy - by no one - United States (Alaska)

Today, I called my mom and I got voicemail: "Hello, this is Joyce. I'm not here at the moment, so leave a message and I will call back as soon as possible. Except if it's Sophie. If it is, get the hell out of my life, biiitch." I'm Sophie. FML

#16277125
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39434) - you deserved it (5202)

On 05/21/2011 at 2:42am - misc - by thatsasquee - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I got motion sickness while having sex. FML

#16265516
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38531) - you deserved it (6226)

On 05/20/2011 at 10:39am - intimacy - by mikeycoco -

Today, my girlfriend asked if we could spice up our sex life. She didn't think it was too funny when I laid out all of our spices on the bed. She now refuses to have sex. FML

#16200408
314 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20189) - you deserved it (60782)

On 05/16/2011 at 1:40am - intimacy - by phoenix101 -

Today, my girlfriend and I were playfully arguing about who loved the other more. After about a minute of this, my girlfriend walked over and kicked me in the crotch as hard as she could. She then said, "There, now you don't love me as much. I win." FML

#15539670
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46017) - you deserved it (15394)

On 03/28/2011 at 11:33pm - love - by ouch - United States (Arizona)

Today, my boyfriend told me how he used to collect little things when he was younger. He then decided to tell me about his current big toe nail collection. FML

#6976804
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25043) - you deserved it (3107)

On 12/27/2009 at 5:34pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I opened some small cute birthday gifts at my boyfriend's house. As we left to go out, he slipped me a Tiffany box and said he wanted me to open it in private. Flushed and excited, I open it to find a ziploc filled with hair. It was his mustache I had been begging him to shave for months. FML

#3997843
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34213) - you deserved it (18655)

On 07/24/2009 at 2:31am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was at work laminating a large photo. While I was doing this, I had a sudden itch on my nut sack. So I quickly scratched it away. When the customer came to pick up the print, I noticed that one of my pubic hairs had laminated itself on the cheek of the woman in the photograph. FML

#869023
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15989) - you deserved it (90087)

On 04/08/2009 at 10:48am - work - by StevieMe (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was feeling sick and having trouble breathing easily. I decided to take a nap and apparently ended up sleeping with my mouth wide open since breathing was an issue. I woke up to my boyfriend trying to put his penis in my mouth. FML

#632473
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (167351) - you deserved it (34001)

On 03/26/2009 at 9:45pm - intimacy - by coughandcold (woman) - United States (California)



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