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Hannahmgp

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Hannahmgp

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 1 October 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1061
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Hannahmgp's page activity

Visits<b>woodencoffin</b> - the 11/24/2012 at 5:05am<b>WiseGuy79</b> - the 10/30/2012 at 5:48pm<b>ncbeach22</b> - the 08/13/2010 at 10:43am

Hannahmgp's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

Hannahmgp's favorite FMLs

Today, my elderly neighbor along with our community church's priest came to my house and demanded to "give them the girl". The girl is my 3-year-old daughter, who has natural born red irises and is photo-sensitive. And yes, we are also Romanian. FML

#20985281
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53110) - you deserved it (2932)

On 12/08/2013 at 5:07pm - kids - by OakStake (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend's idea of foreplay was to offer to make lunch, leave the room for a few minutes, then come back with no clothes on and offer me a "cockmeat sandwich". FML

#20982904
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48520) - you deserved it (8063)

On 12/06/2013 at 3:23pm - intimacy - by fuckadaisical (woman) - United Kingdom (Rhondda Cynon Taff)

Today, we went boating with friends. For some reason the bottom of our tube deflated, causing me to be bounced roughly up and down on the water. As a result, I had the most intense orgasm of my entire life, while sitting 2 inches away from my dad's friend. He definitely noticed. FML

#20862305
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56331) - you deserved it (6003)

On 08/31/2013 at 9:21pm - intimacy - by SplishSplash (woman) - United States

Today, my wife shaved her pubic hair so that it resembles Hitler's mustache. She won't stop referring to it as "the Clitler". FML

#20637691
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60531) - you deserved it (9142)

On 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my grandmother tried to upstage me at my wedding by wearing an actual wedding dress because she "never had a real wedding". FML

#20609675
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53687) - you deserved it (3922)

On 04/21/2013 at 8:26am - misc - by gamerguru13 - United States (New York)

Today, I spent most of my daughter's 8th birthday with her in the hospital while her broken arm was put in a cast. Apparently, my son had told her that some people gained the ability to fly on their 8th birthday before encouraging her to find out by jumping off the slippery slide. FML

#20486554
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23905) - you deserved it (2032)

On 01/30/2013 at 5:50pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I realized my girlfriend makes the same exact noises in bed and when she eats. I don't know if I'm a really good cook or a really bad lover. FML

#20444730
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27657) - you deserved it (3531)

On 01/06/2013 at 8:06am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out that there's something my new wife hates more than spiders. Black people. FML

#20441551
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25828) - you deserved it (5219)

On 01/03/2013 at 9:19pm - health - by WellShit (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I had a proper look at myself in the mirror. I have recently lost 5 lbs. Turns out that it mainly shows on my boob. Not boobs. Boob. Right one only. FML

Today, while studying liver pathology and highlighting important lines in my textbook, I realized that I could count the number of words I hadn't highlighted on one hand, over the last six pages. FML

#20143160
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15829) - you deserved it (7921)

On 11/01/2012 at 5:18pm - misc - by ThisisMedSchool - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my parents gave me a sock and card for my eighteenth birthday. The card said, "Now that Dobby is free, get out." FML

#20118693
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26943) - you deserved it (3327)

On 10/15/2012 at 9:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, while I was using my computer, my cat ran up to the power strip, looked me in the eyes, and hit the power switch, turning everything off. She does this quite often. FML

#20116072
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23284) - you deserved it (4270)

On 10/14/2012 at 3:00am - animals - by stop it ninja - United States (Virginia)

Today, I found out why my cat hasn't been coming home for regular meals. Apparently, my elderly next door neighbour has forgotten that her cat is dead and puts food out for it every morning. My cat is exploiting her by impersonating her dead cat to get better food. My cat is an asshole. FML

#20110144
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27506) - you deserved it (4729)

On 10/10/2012 at 4:43am - animals - by assholecat (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I dropped a whole batch of penis-shaped cookies on the floor. Then I thought, "5-second rule" and started eating them. And then I realized that I was home alone, in pajamas, eating broken dick-cookies off the floor. FML

#20081762
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21962) - you deserved it (12263)

On 09/21/2012 at 3:31am - misc - by RawrSparkle (woman) - United States (California)



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