Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Han1156

Search for a member

Han1156
  • Town/Country : Philadelphia , United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 13 December 1996 (17 years)
  • Number of visits : 4930
  • Number of comments : 84
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

About Han1156 : So I've been around for awhile before boners quit sad face on app a lot but message me I'm on here religiously

Han1156's last visitors

falconjadetall_midgetrapunzel3416lorenlizzyClockworkHeartThursdayxoCanadiansPleasen_bagg05graceinsheepwearwestcoastkpjadeluvWizardo

Han1156's FML badges

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Han1156's badges

Han1156's favorite FMLs

Today, I accidentally let a huge one rip while tending to an older patient at the nursing home where I work. The patient passed away shortly thereafter. Coincidence? FML

#21116703
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13418) - you deserved it (1875)

On 04/18/2014 at 9:19pm - work - by Anonymous - Norway (Nordland)

Today, I got a call from the police that my house had been burglarized, but an off-duty cop caught the criminal. I pull up to see my detained, psycho ex-boyfriend sheepishly grinning at me. He had three of my lace panties and two of my bras, claiming it was "all for memories sake". FML

#21115090
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36329) - you deserved it (2812)

On 04/16/2014 at 11:14pm - love - by exasperated (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was telling my dad about how annoying it was to constantly have my ten-year-old cousin message me about her new boyfriend, when he suddenly bursts out laughing about how she can get a boyfriend at ten, and I have never even kissed a guy and I'm seventeen. FML

#21114115
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33582) - you deserved it (3997)

On 04/15/2014 at 10:18pm - love - by Foreveralone17362562 - Canada (Alberta)

Today, our family went to a water park. The park's mascot came up to greet us, and my daughter got scared. She then refused to go inside, so we had no choice but to leave. FML

#21114019
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28599) - you deserved it (4230)

On 04/15/2014 at 8:20pm - kids - by Someone (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my 12-year-old sister watched Frozen. She's spent the last two hours playing the song Let It Go on high volume over and over, and in different languages. I now have a skull-splitting headache, and my dad just sarcastically told me to "let it go". FML

#21113787
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37581) - you deserved it (4741)

On 04/15/2014 at 3:24pm - kids - by fuckyouharddad - United States (California)

Today, my house was robbed. My two 70-pound German Shepherds obeyed me when I told them to attack. They also obeyed the robber when he said, "Sit". FML

#21113538
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42989) - you deserved it (3746)

On 04/15/2014 at 8:08am - animals - by stupiddog (man) - United States (California)

Today, in the middle of sex, my girlfriend yelled, "STUFF ME LIKE A TURKEY!" I couldn't finish. FML

#21112870
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40651) - you deserved it (4756)

On 04/14/2014 at 4:12pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I had to convince my 3-year-old son that there were monsters in the house just so he would lie in bed and cuddle me. FML

#21112742
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29360) - you deserved it (21074)

On 04/14/2014 at 12:57pm - kids - by tinytiny1124 (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, 30 minutes after finishing a great date with a great girl, she texted me and said, "Yeah, uh, never come near me again." FML

#21112056
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36172) - you deserved it (4592)

On 04/13/2014 at 4:33pm - love - by lax22 - United States (California)

Today, a customer threw his hot coffee all over me, because it was taking "too long" for their credit card to be approved. FML

Today, my obsession with saying "your mom" reached a new level when my anatomy teacher asked what I did with my pencil. FML

#21108224
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17898) - you deserved it (41841)

On 04/09/2014 at 1:17am - misc - by Motha - United States (Utah)

Today, my in-laws moved in. FML

#21107985
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56549) - you deserved it (4927)

On 04/08/2014 at 9:42pm - misc - by Great (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was feeling horny, so I told my boyfriend, who lives 30 minutes away, that "I really needed him". He replied, "Did you fall in the toilet again?" FML

#21107872
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38914) - you deserved it (8253)

On 04/08/2014 at 7:06pm - intimacy - by that girl (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, in an attempt to potty train my step-son, my boyfriend and I put underwear on him, hoping that when he peed himself, he would realize using the potty is the way to go. Instead, he peed while sitting on the couch, got up, took off the underwear, and then switched seats. FML

#21106771
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34481) - you deserved it (10743)

On 04/07/2014 at 1:43pm - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at the café I work at, I was yelled at by a woman because the drinks and food she ordered were "taking too long". Before I had the chance to get a word in, she stormed out and said she would never come back. I didn't get the chance to inform her that she hadn't ordered yet. FML

#21106207
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40329) - you deserved it (2703)

On 04/06/2014 at 8:20pm - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: