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An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, I got my period. Last week, I fell out of a window and landed between my legs on a bush; I have massive swelling down there, and stitches over the ripped flesh. Now I'm bleeding out my period on top of the lingering wounds down there. It hurts even to pee, let alone menstruate. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35918) - you deserved it (3107)
On 11/01/2011 at 5:50pm - health - by stitchesupmyass (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I logged on to Facebook to find that my boyfriend's relationship status had changed to in a relationship with his ex. I asked him about it, and all he said was, "I guess I forgot to break up with you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (31187) - you deserved it (1719)
On 10/01/2011 at 7:03pm - love - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was dragged to the food store with my mom. While we were shopping, the fire alarm went off. My mom pushed the cart at me, nearly knocking me over, and sprinted for the door. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20822) - you deserved it (1578)
On 08/10/2011 at 12:31am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my parents think that I don't realize all the sexual euphemisms in their conversations. One of the more recent ones being made by my dad at the dinner table: "This sausage is great, honey, but mine is bigger and tastier!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (35941) - you deserved it (2701)
On 07/13/2011 at 2:16pm - intimacy - by wittlegirl - United States (California)
Today, my husband and I had just got over a big argument, and I asked him to cut me some cucumbers for my eyes to help me relax. I was laying down, eyed closed, and he set them on my eyes. They weren't cucumbers, they were lemons. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17584) - you deserved it (31043)
On 05/22/2011 at 9:58pm - misc - by lemonhead -
Today, it was sunny and bright so I woke up feeling great. I pulled back the curtains in my room and saw my cat dead on the lawn. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37666) - you deserved it (2847)
On 04/07/2011 at 3:11am - animals - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)
Today, I got banned on Club Penguin because I said "shit" while I was in a fight with another penguin about whose igloo is cooler. Shouldn't I have better things to do on a Friday night? FML
I agree, your life sucks (8436) - you deserved it (32566)
On 02/12/2011 at 1:30am - misc - by courtbabbbby (woman) - United States
Today, I was walking in the park with my boyfriend of 3 years. He stopped and knelt down in front of me. I started to panic, then he told me to calm down, my shoe was untied. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24173) - you deserved it (9532)
On 02/09/2011 at 12:48pm - misc - by maddie! - United States (New York)
Today, I was casually looking through my girlfriend's phone while she got ready, though she made me promise not to. To my confusion, I discovered that she had me listed as 'Saturday' in her contacts. There was also a Thursday, Friday and Sunday listed. I only ever see her on Saturdays. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35225) - you deserved it (7360)
On 10/20/2010 at 12:47am - love - by iprobablyhaveherpes - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, I was at a red light when the guy next to me gave me that look people give when they want a street race. I won, but I should've seen the word "Sheriff" written on the side of his car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6403) - you deserved it (55735)
On 08/01/2010 at 3:41pm - misc - by Our Talisman - Sent from mobile version
Today, I accidentally filled the lemonade machine with margarita mix that already had the tequila mixed in. It was served to three kids before anyone figured it out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8492) - you deserved it (26525)
On 07/13/2010 at 10:10pm - work - by magnolia (woman) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I was checking out a gorgeous woman in spandex with beautiful flowing long black hair on the treadmill at the gym. I spent a few minutes just watching her body move and ripple under the material. She turned off the treadmill and got off, only for me to find out that it was a guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8229) - you deserved it (29142)
On 02/21/2010 at 10:16am - love - by anonymous - United States
Today, it was the last day of finals. After sleeping less than three hours in the last two days, I got in the car to go to school. For a second, I thought my steering wheel, the gas pedal, and brake pedal were all missing. That's when I realized I was sitting in the back seat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23037) - you deserved it (9527)
On 12/10/2009 at 8:08am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)
Today, at 4am, I remembered that I had not studied for my Spanish exam. I panicked, jumped out of bed, and frantically began searching for my notebook. It wasn't until I destroyed my desk and woke up my roommate that I realized that I'm not enrolled in Spanish this semester. It was a nightmare. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24548) - you deserved it (6925)
On 11/30/2009 at 7:19pm - misc - by Stressmess - United States (Vermont)
Today, I wanted to be creative. I hid an engagement ring for my girlfriend inside one of her running shoes. I expected her to find it and wake me up, but she didn't. Later, when I asked if there was anything in her shoe, she responded, "There was a rock. I just shook it out outside. Why?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (18326) - you deserved it (40787)
On 08/28/2009 at 11:08am - love - by fmlll (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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