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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Guillaume

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Guillaume
  • Town/Country : Paris, France
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3896
  • Number of comments : 121
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Guillaume : Co founder Fmylife.com

Guillaume's last visitors

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Guillaume's favorite FMLs

Today, I tried to hint to my husband that we needed a new washing machine. I mentioned that we got our current one way back on our wedding day. He replied, "Yeah, and I got you too." FML

#17999890 (190)

I agree, your life sucks (18537) - you deserved it (5100) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/16/2011 at 5:08pm - love - by poluxe - France

Today, at work, a regular started talking to me. Subject of choice? His overwhelming amount of earwax. Apparently he'd like to make a candle out of it once he goes to the doctor to get it removed. FML

#17106852 (77)

I agree, your life sucks (15486) - you deserved it (1205)

On 07/14/2011 at 11:25am - work - by Breanne - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, after dealing with tons of drama and working a 14 hour shift, I took a shower. When I stepped out, a weak spot in the floor gave way. While falling through the floor I grabbed the toilet tank lid, which fell into the tank and broke it. Now my leg hurts and the bathroom's flooded. FML

#14969181 (45)

I agree, your life sucks (21477) - you deserved it (1911)

On 02/14/2011 at 2:11am - misc - by TheKingDavis (man) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I arranged to have some flowers delivered at work for Valentine's Day so that my colleagues will think someone likes me. FML

#14967945 (82)

I agree, your life sucks (19223) - you deserved it (14281)

On 02/14/2011 at 12:34am - love - by alone (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I found out that it is never, ever a good idea to put a band-aid of any kind on your penis, because eventually you will have to take it off. FML

#14967873 (110)

I agree, your life sucks (5952) - you deserved it (33886)

On 02/14/2011 at 12:31am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, on the bus, water kept dripping on my head so I stood up to move. As I got up, the bus turned round a corner and I fell over into a man's lap. When I tried to get up, I slipped down between his legs. FML

#14963197 (56)

I agree, your life sucks (18718) - you deserved it (2162)

On 02/13/2011 at 8:18pm - misc - by alice (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my roommate complained about his penis being smelly and itchy. It's been a week. Yesterday he woke me up in the middle of the night, asking if I had some kind of Vaseline or moisturizer he could use for the itching. He still refuses to go to the doctor. FML

#14962241 (88)

I agree, your life sucks (20189) - you deserved it (1627)

On 02/13/2011 at 7:09pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, it was my first day at work as a cashier. I was so nervous that my whole body got numb and my eye sight completely blurred. I ran to the bathroom blind while bumping into everything in the store, making sure that everyone knew I had a problem. FML

#14905447 (123)

I agree, your life sucks (15505) - you deserved it (4973)

On 02/09/2011 at 2:32am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got mugged. But luckily I had on my keyring the pepper spray that my husband had insisted I keep with me. Unlucky for me, my husband's co-worker, who borrowed my keys, emptied my pepper by spraying it on a brick wall one day when he was bored. FML

#14902184 (117)

I agree, your life sucks (23227) - you deserved it (1840)

On 02/08/2011 at 10:27pm - misc - by Username -

Today, I went to get an ultrasound of my reproductive system done because I was having some abdominal pain. Everything was fine until the tech suddenly gasped and said, "Oh my God! You have two uteruses! Want me to print off a picture so you can show them off to your friends?" FML

#14898622 (195)

I agree, your life sucks (24214) - you deserved it (2146)

On 02/08/2011 at 6:29pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I got a call from my daughter’s teacher asking me to come pick her up. My daughter wouldn’t tell her what was wrong. I left an important work meeting. When I got there she stated her boyfriend broke up with her and she couldn't emotionally make it through the rest of the day. She's 5. FML

#14895489 (236)

I agree, your life sucks (42028) - you deserved it (5331)

On 02/08/2011 at 12:46pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was attacked by clowns at work. I don't work at the circus. FML

#14894865 (95)

I agree, your life sucks (22262) - you deserved it (2503)

On 02/08/2011 at 11:27am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, while on the treadmill, my iPod fell and shot out underneath my feet. I got off to get it, and when I tried to get back on, I slipped and fell on my face on the moving track. The whole gym watched me get beat up by a treadmill and clapped when I finally got back on. FML

#7124600 (70)

I agree, your life sucks (17878) - you deserved it (3902)

On 01/03/2010 at 11:28am - health - by i-should-probably-stick-to-swimming (man) - United States (California)