Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Grimmerie

Search for a member

Grimmerie

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 4 December 1991 (22 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4445
  • Number of comments : 648
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 25 posted

About Grimmerie : Hey guys. I'm generally a pretty chill guy, with a very sarcastic, dry sense of humour. Occasionally I become very opinionated.

I like animals. I currently own a rat, a rabbit, and a dog.

I used to own a white's tree frog, fire belly newts, red fin sharks, a turtle, bettas (bred them for a few years), aquatic frogs, and a saltwater tank full of sea horses and live coral.

My girlfriend keeps and breed snakes, as well as owning a blue-tongued skink.



Why did Sally fall off the swings?
She has no arms.

Knock knock
Who's there?
Not Sally.

Grimmerie's page activity

Visits<b>RagingWill</b> - yesterday at 10:02pm<b>NotAUser</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 12:39am<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 12:37am<b>epic174</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 11:17am<b>Queensland</b> - the 09/25/2014 at 11:39pm<b>chipinn</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 11:57pm<b>tagallopes</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 9:37pm<b>simplysarcastics</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 7:14pm<b>adamjcurryy</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 4:55am<b>delhh</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 8:57pm<b>FrenchieJoking</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 10:34pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 2:52pm<b>ImTheAlpha</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 12:34am<b>Gemma_Mansonite</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 1:24pm<b>Nooblah</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 3:08am<b>shanekicksass</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 4:57pm<b>bkirky</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 4:21pm<b>Jumbabaginji</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 5:32am

Grimmerie's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of Grimmerie's badges

Grimmerie's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my grandfather smiling at his penis. FML

#20449931
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33104) - you deserved it (4724)

On 01/09/2013 at 11:48am - misc - by lovingthis - United States (Florida)

Today, my girlfriend looked me straight in the eye and said, "I know about the sea turtles." I asked her what she was talking about and she said, "Next time, shut up or I'll show you pain." I have no idea what she's talking about. FML

#20170012
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20744) - you deserved it (1944)

On 11/19/2012 at 8:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went out of my way to avoid street preachers thrusting hateful propaganda at me. A young woman ran up to me and started waving paper in my face, and I snapped at her to fuck off. Right afterwards I realised she was returning something that fell out of my pocket. She looked terrified. FML

#20133994
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7149) - you deserved it (29552)

On 10/26/2012 at 8:24am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I got back my history paper. The whole paper had been crossed out and at the end, my professor had written "Really?!" I still don't know what I did wrong. FML

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. When she went to give me a blow job, I got embarrassed and told her I'd rather just please her instead. Now she thinks she's inadequate and I'm being a jerk. FML

#20132312
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23836) - you deserved it (16479)

On 10/25/2012 at 1:45am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my young son and I were in line at Subway. I guess he got bored and started to insult the teenage girl behind us. I tried to get him to stop, but he wouldn't listen. Eventually the girl punched him in the face and left. As my son cried uncontrollably, everyone else there clapped. FML

#20129296
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9644) - you deserved it (51885)

On 10/23/2012 at 12:25am - kids - by Bratty son (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I saw my music teacher, who I considered one of my role-models, on TV. Too bad it was because she'd robbed a church. FML

#20128657
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18898) - you deserved it (1538)

On 10/22/2012 at 6:51pm - misc - by musicthief - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I learned that scorpions can apparently hold their breath for hours, and that doing so makes them angry. I found this out when I removed a scorpion from the bottom of my pool and found that it was not entirely drowned. FML

#20112873
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23536) - you deserved it (2209)

On 10/11/2012 at 10:56pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my 6-year-old son pooped in the back yard and used a stick to throw it over the fence into my neighbor's yard. FML

#20109382
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19987) - you deserved it (3166)

On 10/09/2012 at 6:56pm - kids - by fionnathehuman - United States

Today, I was really impressed with the man I've been in a relationship with for over 2 years. He had finally really cleaned his apartment. Everything was washed and fixed, even my stuff was cleared from open surfaces. All so his lover would not find out about me. FML

#20094642
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23371) - you deserved it (2050)

On 09/30/2012 at 2:29am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Oslo)

Today, I found out my little brother is a highly committed Nazi. He goes to meetings and everything, my parents think it's great he is "getting out and developing a social life." FML

#20078083
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29013) - you deserved it (1762)

On 09/18/2012 at 5:46pm - misc - by he is going to hell (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went for my follow-up appointment with my surgeon. He walked into the room and said, "I thought you died." FML

Today, my boyfriend called out the word "scalpel" when he orgasmed. He won't tell me why. FML

#20072555
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24868) - you deserved it (2550)

On 09/15/2012 at 3:36am - intimacy - by not the scalpel (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was out shopping, when I noticed a teenage girl with a double stroller picking up a pack of condoms. I couldn't help but mutter that it was a little late for those. A guy who must have been her boyfriend then stormed over and beat the shit out of me. FML

#20066250
331 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17005) - you deserved it (67976)

On 09/10/2012 at 1:52pm - intimacy - by killmenow - United States (Washington)

Today, my co-worker and I were having a conversation in Russian. Our boss overheard us talking, shouted, "I know you're talking about me! I speak Spanish too!" and threatened to fire us. FML

#20061927
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25214) - you deserved it (2968)

On 09/07/2012 at 12:23pm - work - by PuddlePirate (man) - United States (Minnesota)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: