GreeenEggsAndHam

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GreeenEggsAndHam

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3744
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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GreeenEggsAndHam's page activity

Visits<b>Mons</b> - the 03/02/2016 at 4:57pm<b>Robert3Lee</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 12:44am<b>Crazion</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 12:48pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 01/19/2016 at 8:06pm<b>legendairy3000</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 3:06pm<b>alex_gen</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 12:40am<b>scott421</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 8:29am<b>macaire</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 7:59pm<b>Scarylizard1798</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 6:51pm<b>vlader08</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 4:48pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 6:22pm<b>Kylandeshon</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 4:00am<b>mcdekree</b> - the 03/03/2014 at 9:52pm<b>Way2Fast8</b> - the 02/28/2014 at 12:39am<b>Furby94</b> - the 02/09/2014 at 4:42pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 3:38am<b>bmba94</b> - the 10/15/2013 at 6:57pm<b>mariepastyglue</b> - the 10/03/2013 at 12:50pm

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GreeenEggsAndHam's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that the girl who my high school boyfriend cheated on me with is now the woman my husband is having an affair with. FML

by sad / 01/08/2011 at 12:22am / United States (Oregon) / Love

Today, my boss decided to post a photo of a piece of crap on Facebook. He tagged me in it. FML

by poop / 01/07/2011 at 8:31pm / United States (Missouri) / Work

Today, I went on a date for the first time in months. Over dessert, my date told a joke, and I tittered vigorously, causing me to choke and throw up all over my date. FML

by Anonymous / 01/07/2011 at 6:42pm / United Kingdom (London) / Love

Today, I realized that every time I hear running water, I have less than a minute to find a toilet or I'll pee my pants. FML

by walnutbladder / 01/07/2011 at 4:46pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, while on a six hour flight, someone offered to pay me $20 to swap seats with them. It seemed like a great deal, so I immediately accepted and moved to my new seat. I didn't realize my new neighbor was an old man with a raging boner. FML

by anonymous / 01/07/2011 at 3:21pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I told my boyfriend about my foot phobia. To help me "get over it", he took his socks off, pinned me down, and rubbed his foot against my face until I started sobbing. FML

by BiteMe14 / 01/07/2011 at 2:10pm / United States / Love

Today, I asked my boyfriend if my ass looked big in my new jeans. He looked, and then started singing "I like big butts and I cannot lie". FML

by Anonymous / 01/07/2011 at 8:12am / Sweden (Orebro Lan) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via text message. You would think he could at least spell my name right while ending our relationship. FML

by bunnyyy / 01/07/2011 at 3:41am / United States (Wisconsin) / Love

Today, I got diarrhea while on a trip with my daughters. At our third stop, I had to sit in the stall listening to my 5 year-old informing everyone who came in that "mommy is stopping at EVERY bathroom to poop." FML

by Anonymous / 01/07/2011 at 3:03am / United States / Kids

Today, I had to walk three miles home from work. Both my parents were at home. The reason they wouldn't collect me is apparently because I've "gotten so fat, your grandma cried after she saw you". FML

by biscuit / 01/07/2011 at 12:46am / United Kingdom / Health

Today, my mom duly informed me I'm the reason people have middle fingers. FML

by edulover / 12/31/2010 at 8:16pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was applying some Icy Hot to my sore thighs, when I accidentally got a little on my dime sacks. For the next hour, it felt like someone had lit a match under my plums. FML

by person / 12/26/2010 at 12:59pm / Jordan (Amman Governorate) / Health

Today, my last remaining pet, a hamster, died. Even he thinks it's better to drown in his water dish than brave the world living with me. FML

by Anonymous / 12/19/2010 at 3:51pm / United States (Arizona) / Animals

Today, as I got to my first class seat on an airplane, I saw the person I'd be sitting next to wafting the smell of her vagina towards herself and breathing in deeply. It's an eight hour flight. FML

by Anonymous / 12/17/2010 at 8:28pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, my six year old told me I have a big nose. When I told her that she hurt my feelings, she laughed and said "Don't be silly mummy, ugly people don't have feelings." FML

by uglywoman / 12/14/2010 at 3:21am / Australia (Queensland) / Kids