About GracesDelirium : I won't hate you unless I have a reason to. Any questions, just message me. I usually use the app, so I may not get back to you for awhile.
~Grace'sDelirium
Ps. Fuck what my profile says, I was born on the 12th. Girl scouts day. ._.
Things I've learned from FML:
If something important is happening in your life, you should expect to get your period at the same time.
You should never have kids, because apparently they 'say the darnedest things'.
Whenever your boyfriend/girlfriend does anything slightly offensive, you should dump them straight away.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, I went to my daughter's room with clean laundry. I found her lying on her bed with a hand down her pants, totally zoned out and staring blankly at the Justin Bieber poster on her wall. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38100) - you deserved it (4753)
On 03/03/2013 at 12:03pm - misc - by parental failure (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, someone painted the "Dark Mark" on the side of my car. It won't come off and my kids refuse to get in because it means "a wizard died in there." FML
I agree, your life sucks (27556) - you deserved it (3153)
On 12/19/2012 at 9:59am - kids - by spellbound - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, at a Christmas party, my crush came up to me and cutely pointed out that I was standing under mistletoe. The only response my stupid brain could think of was, "Probably full of nargles though." He gave me a confused look and walked away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19802) - you deserved it (8926)
On 12/16/2012 at 6:51pm - love - by Rhine (woman) - Barbados (Saint Michael)
Today, my friends and I were playing truth or dare game. It was late and we were drunk, so they dared me to run naked into my neighbor's yard while yelling, "Help! The pixies took my penis!" I ran screaming right into their big family reunion. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5385) - you deserved it (26374)
On 11/21/2012 at 4:06pm - misc - by nekkidness (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I told my son to go clean his mess of a room. He yelled, "Dobby has no master! Dobby is a free elf!" and walked off. He turned 18 a week ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20324) - you deserved it (9447)
On 07/25/2012 at 6:54am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, my sister, knowing that I'm terrified of his face, taped a picture of Michael Jackson over our toilet. When I entered the washroom, I sprinted back out screaming. Minutes later, while in the shower, I happened to glance up at the ceiling. Guess who was grinning down at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20687) - you deserved it (7339)
Today, my 24-year-old brother tried to convince me that Hogwarts is real, because there is no way a person could have written that based on imagination. My parents agreed with him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20243) - you deserved it (2881)
On 06/04/2012 at 3:19am - kids - by nanall - United States
Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (9700) - you deserved it (39858) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France
Today, I discovered the hard way that all the scare stories I'd heard about rats getting into pipes and finding their way into your toilet are, in fact, true. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19010) - you deserved it (1359)
On 02/21/2012 at 2:17pm - misc - by TheHezzer - United Kingdom (Bristol)
Today, I came home to find my house destroyed. I was so devastated, I cried. I had spent days hand-crafting the house to perfection, down to the finest detail. On Minecraft. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10369) - you deserved it (29909)
On 08/13/2011 at 4:22pm - misc - by ifailsobadly (man) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)
Today, while walking home from work, a young teenage girl ran up behind me and dumped a carton of milk on my head. She said, "The cow master baptizes you!" and then ran in the opposite direction, cackling madly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28542) - you deserved it (3236)
On 07/29/2011 at 8:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I went to see a movie I'd been waiting months for. A couple of women sat down a few rows in front of me with five infants. The infants cried and wailed throughout. I'm not sure I have any idea what was actually said in any of the dialogue. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23631) - you deserved it (2005)
On 07/22/2011 at 7:49pm - misc - by AceGeek (man) - United States (California)
TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30152) - you deserved it (24879)
On 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)
Today, I went into my room and found a plastic snake on the floor. I yelled out to my sister, "Good one, Ellen!" I picked up the snake to take it to show her. The snake started moving in my hands and bit me. I had to go to the hospital. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24830) - you deserved it (5528)
On 12/04/2009 at 8:16pm - misc - by olive_costume (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my son's hamster died. It was overweight and got stuck in its plastic tube. My 6 year old son came downstairs to me smashing a plastic tube with a dead hamster in it on the kitchen table. He thinks I killed it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25162) - you deserved it (3411)
On 10/27/2009 at 3:35pm - animals - by freylero - United Kingdom (Greater London)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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