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Grace598's FML badges
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Grace598's favorite FMLs
Today, I was in a big Skype chat, which somehow turned into a heated argument. My friend lost it, typed "your stupid" and called me a "looser." When I pointed out the irony of his messages, he rage-quit, drove all the way to my house, and punched me in the face at the door. FML
by -1 friend / 05/17/2013 at 5:16pm / United States (Florida) / Health
by LibraryPedo / 04/25/2013 at 9:37pm / United States (California) / Kids
by traitor / 04/23/2013 at 7:04pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love
Today, in my job as an assistant at a music venue, I had to get posters signed by that night's performer. When I walked into the dressing room, I was told, "unless you're sucking my cock then get the fuck out of here" and had the posters slapped out of my hands. It's my job to deal with these pricks. FML
by Anonymous / 04/02/2013 at 9:26pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Work
Today, I was feeling sick and fainted while teaching my kindergarten class. I came to when one boy poured a cup of water on my face. Three kids were crying into my walkie talkie telling the office I was dead, and the rest of the class had disappeared. FML
by kindergarten teacher / 03/23/2013 at 9:25am / United States (California) / Kids
Today, a guy wolf-whistled me as I walked to the shop wearing comfy joggers, no makeup and my hair scraped back. Feeling rather pleased about it, I told my best friend and my fiancé. Their unanimous conclusion: the guy must have been drunk or taking hallucinogenic drugs. FML
by bananamontana85 / 02/17/2013 at 5:20am / United Kingdom (Wigan) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was in the elevator, when a big bearded guy stepped in, wearing a dress. It's not an uncommon sight where I live, but my friend cracked up and asked him if he was wearing underwear. He took it as a challenge, and I can safely say that no, he was not. FML
by juvenile friends suck / 01/10/2013 at 3:52pm / Germany (Schleswig-Holstein) / Intimacy
by Jane / 12/22/2012 at 6:29pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids
by Anonymous / 12/13/2012 at 7:37am / United States (California) / Kids
Today, my boss was telling everyone that he knew a guy who went to a college at which multiple people were shot and killed recently. Being extremely socially awkward and uncomfortable, I blurted, "That's awesome." Now everyone in the office is terrified of me. FML
by Adan / 12/04/2012 at 4:34pm / United States (Washington) / Work
Today, I played paintball with a bunch of friends. By the end of the day, my girlfriend and I were the only people left on the field. She shot me mercilessly, and I screamed like a little girl. 30 people watched, 4 people filmed. FML
by Z / 11/26/2012 at 5:26am / Australia / Miscellaneous
Today, at work, I took an order from a stuck-up sounding lady over the phone. She said her last name was "duckling, but with an F". Bemused, I wrote her name on the order. When she arrived to pick it up later, she told me she'd said "s", not "f". FML
by Anonymous / 11/24/2012 at 7:25pm / New Zealand (Canterbury) / Work
Today, my boyfriend and I got into an argument; however, his new-found passion for hardcore rapping meant that he tried to "diss" me using bad rhymes and ill thought-out putdowns. It was ridiculous, and didn't really make any sense, so I started giggling. He stormed off, grumbling. FML
by Popscene / 09/26/2012 at 5:06am / Australia (Queensland) / Love
Today, I learned I'm not allergic to gluten. My mom has kept me on a gluten free diet since I was 5. She was convinced I was allergic to it. I'm 25 and I am writing this over my first slice of pizza in 20 years. FML
by Emma / 09/04/2012 at 5:38pm / United States (Missouri) / Health
by scarredforlife / 08/16/2012 at 12:05am / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous