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GooglyFML

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GooglyFML
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  • Number of visits : 2323
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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GooglyFML's favorite FMLs

Today, my boss told me his cancer test results came back positive. I congratulated him and asked how he planned to celebrate. It turns out a positive cancer test result is a bad thing. FML

#20083093
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5093) - you deserved it (39859)

On 09/22/2012 at 2:24am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my five-year-old told me she had accidentally swallowed a thumbtack. In panic mode we raced to the ER. With no insurance. Only after the tests, examinations and X-rays did she tell me was "just joking." FML

#20081621
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26715) - you deserved it (2837)

On 09/21/2012 at 12:51am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I had breakfast with his grandmother. She told him how I'm prettier than "that Mexican" he'd brought home for dinner last week. We had dinner with her last week, and I'm that same Mexican. She then went on to how Mexicans are what's wrong with the economy. FML

#20071462
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24676) - you deserved it (2540)

On 09/14/2012 at 10:13am - misc - by MexicanMe (woman) - United States

Today, I learned that I'm expecting twins. A boy and a girl. My husband, upon finding out about this, immediately suggested that we give them Star Wars names. But not Luke and Leia. Oh no. He wants to name them Darth and Vayda. And he is absolutely serious about this. FML

#20068529
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21709) - you deserved it (3434)

On 09/12/2012 at 3:03am - kids - by AGeeksWife (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I spent five minutes sitting in my car, panicking and tearing my purse apart because I couldn't find my keys. I then found them. They were in the ignition, and the car was running. FML

#20066828
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5636) - you deserved it (23491)

On 09/10/2012 at 10:04pm - misc - by mrs14 - United States

Today, I was driving with my boss and she held her breath as we drove past a cell tower, because she didn't want to "breathe in any radiation." I have to take orders from this moron. FML

#20060271
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17586) - you deserved it (1033)

On 09/06/2012 at 9:45am - work - by Heavy D - United States

Today, I'm quite ill. My new step-mother believes that the genetic wheat allergy I got from my mother would have gone away since she's now married to my father instead. Looks like dad picked a winner. FML

#20057050
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21706) - you deserved it (977)

On 09/04/2012 at 4:53am - misc - by hooligyn123 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were watching TV and there were penguins laying eggs. He said, "Penguins are mammals, they don't lay eggs." I replied, "Penguins are birds." We fought about it for ages until he realised that I was right, and has since stopped talking to me. FML

#20054655
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18849) - you deserved it (2060)

On 09/02/2012 at 8:10pm - animals - by difference between birds and mammals. - Australia

Today, I found out my husband has been talking to another woman on Facebook. His only defense was "I thought I deleted the messages." FML

#20051914
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18805) - you deserved it (1852)

On 09/01/2012 at 2:02am - love - by gmac0417 - United States

Today, I received a call from my future sister in-law, telling me that she and her future husband had decided to hold their wedding ceremony on my birthday. I was told not to celebrate my birthday, as it would "take away the attention to the true meaning of the day." FML

Today, I wore an expensive vintage blazer which I'd purchased at a market in Paris. Turns out my colleague has the exact same one, only hers is from a clearance rack at Target. FML

#20045097
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17292) - you deserved it (7553)

On 08/27/2012 at 8:10pm - misc - by arh (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by picture, during a game of Draw Something. FML

#20042043
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27456) - you deserved it (1867)

On 08/26/2012 at 1:03am - love - by wtf - New Zealand (Southland)

Today, I realized how much I hate my girlfriend, when I got excited as the doctor told me I should refrain from having sex for the next two months. FML

#20035872
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8464) - you deserved it (24391)

On 08/22/2012 at 4:08pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was so desperate for any kind of male romantic attention that I googled "prison pen pals", and I'm considering writing to one. FML

#20033437
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8778) - you deserved it (18054)

On 08/21/2012 at 4:39am - love - by desperategurl (woman) - United States (Arizona)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

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  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

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